“The bullies have left the playground, graduated, and joined corporate America.”

I remember my first day at a company where I could immediately sense that I wasn’t wanted. It started with small things—misspelling my name on purpose, denying me standard company merch, and “forgetting” to send my work equipment. But as time passed, the behavior escalated.

I became the subject of rumors: being labeled “un-American” because of my immigrant parents, having my citizenship questioned, and my living situation scrutinized. Petty comments about whether I had a car, and even worse, assumptions about my salary and whether I “deserved” it at my age. And of course, the classic, "you're only here because you're black."

Then came the gang-stalking on social media—mocking my posts, inappropriate comments from older colleagues, and being told to give up a side hobby that paid for my tuition, apartment, and car. Even changing documentation. I had to block 50-year-old men stalking my profile, sending inappropriate messages, and making lewd comments. They even held a watch party for my Ted Talk just to tell me it "sucked."

What truly got me were the fake meetings—hour-long sessions designed to misdirect and waste my time. Had I not documented everything, I would have doubted my own sanity.

I finally made a report to HR which was leaked, causing me to be cornered and threatened.

Then it hit me - They're miserable and they wanted me to be miserable too. These adults must be to behave that way at their age. Their entire lives seemed to revolve around a job, and it became clear that their attacks were mask for their jealousy and envy. The goal? To break my confidence. It kills me with laughter to see their LinkedIn profiles advocating for "diversity" and a "positive" work environment. It’s almost tragic—people so consumed by their own insecurities that they lash out at others. To this day, they are still stalking my socials and, attempting to contact me. It's not natural to be so consumed by the day to day life of someone you don't respect or admire. But, that's the kicker - they do and, they hate themselves for it.

Here’s the lesson I’ve learned: Instead of staying in that toxic environment, instead of playing their game, I realized my own power to walk away. Leaving that situation opened doors to new, better, opportunities, environments, and true personal growth.

You don’t have to stay where you’re not valued. THIS IS JUST A JOB!

(edited)

I immediately requested a break from work and tapped into my amazing network that has come to my aid, without fail, for 4 years. Once I put myself out there, I was inundated with companies who wanted to hire me and, closed the year off with 7 6 figure job offers!

When you recognize your worth and trust in your ability to thrive elsewhere, the doors will open. Keep pushing forward—your success is waiting on the other side of your courage.

I,now, see it for what it is. And I’ll never let it define me. Your book is yours to write.

Below I have attached an article on workplace mobbing so, you can have the language to articulate what you're facing and properly protect yourself: https://www.allvoices.co/blog/what-is-workplace-mobbing

(edited to include tips if you are experiencing mobbing)

Recognizing Workplace Mobbing or Toxicity

1. Look for Patterns: Mobbing often involves efforts to isolate, undermine, or demean someone. If multiple people seem to target you in subtle or overt ways, it might not be a coincidence.
2. Document Everything: Keep a detailed record of incidents, including dates, times, witnesses, and behavior. Save emails, messages, and other communications that demonstrate toxic behavior.
3. Trust Your Instincts: If something feels off, it probably is. Gaslighting is a common tactic in toxic environments, so don’t second-guess your experiences just because others try to downplay them.

Protecting Yourself

1. Know Your Rights: Familiarize yourself with company policies, labor laws, and anti-discrimination regulations.
2. Set Boundaries: Assertively address inappropriate behavior when it happens. Sometimes, calling out bad behavior can stop it from escalating
3. Leverage HR Strategically: If you decide to report incidents to HR, present your case clearly and professionally with documented evidence. Be mindful that HR’s role is to protect the company, not necessarily you, so assess your options carefully. They are not your friend (learned that the hard way).

Deciding to Leave

1. Evaluate the Cost of Staying: If the environment is taking a toll on your mental health, confidence, or career growth, it might be time to move on. No job is worth sacrificing your well-being.
2. Plan Your Exit Strategically
3. Leave on Your Terms: When you’re ready to go, resign gracefully, even if the experience was terrible. Staying professional ensures you leave the door open for future opportunities and keeps your reputation intact.

Healing and Thriving Post-Toxic Workplace

1. Focus on Growth: Use the experience as a lesson in resilience and self-worth.
2. Surround Yourself with Positivity: Seek out workplaces and teams that value inclusion, collaboration, and respect
3. Share Your Story: Talking about your experiences, as I’ve done in this post, not only helps others but also empowers you to reclaim your narrative.

Additional Tips

• Professional Help: Therapy or career coaching can help you process the experience and rebuild your confidence.
• Online Communities: Join LinkedIn groups or forums where professionals share experiences and advice about toxic workplaces. Reddit is your best friend or at least it was mine, haha
• Books and Articles: Read “The No Asshole Rule” by Robert Sutton or articles on navigating workplace toxicity.