Built To Last: 5 Learnings How to Sustain your Relationship with Your Co-Founder

My co-founder Carlo and I founded our company AppLike six years ago and worked together for eight years in total. I’m turning 30 this year, so eight years is roughly 25% of my life. That’s a long time.

From what I’ve heard, most founder-teams have “broken up“ by this point in their relationships. Bucking that trend, it feels like we just started. In fact, Carlo and I just came back from a 10-day yoga and surf vacation (who would have thought... we are not Yogis). 

People tend to be surprised (and amused) that — next to spending let’s say 50-70% of any regular work week together — we even like to share our free time. During the last vacation days I took the time to reflect on why Carlo and I actually work together so well, and how we have sustained such a well-working professional relationship and — even more importantly — genuine friendship. 

Here are my five main learnings: 

1) Shared values are key to success

We met in 2012 at a business plan competition. At a much earlier point in each of our lives, both of us seem to have individually developed a high level of drive and seek independence and competitiveness. Carlo was a swimming and fighting sports champion, I won classical piano competitions. Carlo made his first money by selling products on the Internet before Google was founded. I sold lottery tickets to my neighbors, walking from door to door. Carlo financed his studies alone from day one through software freelance jobs. I left home at 16 after organizing myself a scholarship that allowed me to go to a boarding school. 

Sitting in the driver seat of our lives has always been a priority for each of us.

We both grew up with teachers as parents, (i.e. we had a stable financial background but rather down-to-earth lifestyles), where being part of the local sports club took a larger share of life than expensive long-distance vacation trips. We don‘t like pricey cars, watches, or clothes. We put a premium on authenticity. For both of us, money is seen as a tool for independence, not to impress others. 

Our values play a crucial role in building our companies at AppLike Group. People asking us questions such as ”Is that the right decision?”, ”Is this a good or bad business?“ or “Can Susanne take two days off as her grandmother is in hospital?” would get the same answer, no matter which one of us they ask. In that way, we value that we agree on how to treat people, build a business, and what really matters in the long-term.

2) Combining different personalities makes building a company exciting and successful

While we agree on what‘s right and wrong, the key characteristics of our personalities could not be more different.

Carlo seeks confrontation, is passionate in every up/down and always hears the WHAT in what people say. I rather tend to equalize tension in meetings, I try to stay calm as a basis to derive action and instead ask myself WHY someone said something (before looking into the WHAT). Carlo drives an enormous amount of action points per day, aiming to solve any issue right when it appears. I reflect and analyze to change the overall structure we work in. As we find in nine out of ten cases that we are much stronger together than alone, we have developed strong trust, connection, and personal appreciation for each other.

3) Complementary skills mean we need each other

AppLike is an Ad-Tech Company in the wider sense. In a nutshell: Carlo is “the Tech”, I am “the Ad.” We are dependent on each other’s strengths. If Carlo left the company tomorrow, I would have difficulty running the business. And he just told me the same some days ago. 

I love to make deals and negotiate, Carlo likes to build products that work and make money. I have relevant skills in business modeling, marketing, finance etc. Carlo can build an app, API, or backend himself. I enjoy presentations from a connecting with people point of view; for Carlo they are tools to transfer information.

Of course, we also share some skills as well e.g. analyzing a competitor's product and business strategy in three minutes. But the majority of our skills are complementary. 

4) Always have a shared milestone to keep working in the same direction

You need a common goal. There are a lot of books about how to create a big vision for your company. You simply must agree on the direction of your company. That's the basics. 

However, when it comes to day-to-day-conflicts with your co-founder, your vision can increase your problem rather than solve it. You might fight over a simple topic such as the product roadmap for Q3 this year. You believe A, she/he believes B. As both of you think you are right in the context of the more significant cause, the discussion can be emotional and endless.

We found it works much better to agree on an ambitious goal you want to achieve in six months to derive priorities e.g. increasing daily revenues from 100k USD to 200k USD. “That would be awesome Carlo, right?“ ”Yeah, that would be super great.” (both excited) ”Which feature helps us more with that, A or B?” ...

Agreeing on a next milestone allows you to argue in a much more actionable way, making it less personal and more about your shared excitement to succeed.

5) Spending professional and private quality time keeps us sane

It‘s important to invest into your relationship, this counts for your significant other, and also for you and your co-founder. I figure there are three levels of time investment, which are important. 

Make your weekly meeting holy — no exceptions! 

There is no one in the company that can give you such honest feedback as your co-founder. The value that comes out of our weeklies in terms of actions for business is key. 

Take the time for strategy offsites!

Twice a year, we travel somewhere to discuss company strategy and where we stand in our relationship. Just the two of us. These are usually five-day trips, always in another city.

Spend friend time!

Every few weeks, we meet on the weekend to play sports, have drinks, and to walk my dog. Work is usually not a topic here. It‘s all about spending time together as friends. Recently, someone asked me:

What do you believe will survive longer: Your company, or your friendship with Carlo?

The short answer: Our friendship. The long answer: Building AppLike brought that friendship to the next level. By further investing into our friendship, we are going to take AppLike to the next level. Starting tomorrow.

What are your learnings how to sustain your work-relationships? I'd be happy to hear more ideas!

Jonas

www.applike-group.com