Building Your Relationships - the Power of Likability

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Do your potential clients like you?

Do they perceive you as likable--and I mean really likable?

If they don't, none of the rest of your efforts to establish yourself as the answer to their problems will matter.

As a professional, have you ever wondered why some professionals seem to garner all the praise and success, while others stay a ‘best-kept secret’ and are overlooked?

Do you think it’s sheer luck – being in the right place at the right time? Or maybe because these professionals work so much harder than others?

The truth is far away from it.

In my research for my bestselling book “The Attention Switch”, I found out that all of us like to get attention and to be recognized.

Not surprising. Right?

According to the author of the paper “The Politics of Recognition” by Charles Taylor:

“Due recognition is not just a courtesy we owe people, but a vital human need.”

I must confess to you.

I never met any professional -or actually any human being- that does not strive to be acknowledged for their efforts.

This acknowledgment is an important part of building and creating your everlasting authority position.

But here is an interesting finding.

There is one asset that can have a tremendous influence on your capacity to garner that respect and recognition and help you build your authority faster.

Do you want to guess what it is?

This week, we're going to?SWITCH ON your likability factor.

It is – the L-Factor - Likeability.

Do you need evidence?

Let’s go back to your school period.

Can you recall if you rated your teachers by your likability?

The University of Hawaii conducted a students survey about course evaluations to investigate the link between liking and learning.

They found that:

“Students who rate their instructor high in likability, they reward that instructor with a high rating on overall teaching ability…likability was the strongest predictor of students’ overall rating of their teachers.”

The same is also true about the students themselves.

Likable students receive recognition and reach better positions due to their likability factor as well.

Very interesting...

...but again-not surprising.

This is true also in our professional environments.

Yes, you read it right.

People are emotional creatures, like our bosses, clients, partners etc.

A likable professional, that produces positive feelings in others, be it their colleagues, partners, clients or even their boss, will get better annual reviews and opportunities than an unlikeable professional.

And more importantly, the likable professional gets more sincere feedback from different people, who really want to help them succeed, allowing for continuous improvement.

Want some evidence?

Based on a study done by TalentSmart, with more than one million people, found that people who are highly likable outperform those who aren’t.

The same holds true in the professional industry.

Why is it so important?

With so many demands on your clients' attention these days, they have to filter and carefully select what they are going to pay attention to.

This is why becoming and establishing yourself as a highly likable authority is so important.

It is quite obvious that without having (the right) people paying attention to your message, you will not establish your authority position.

Do you agree?

Your potential clients need a reason to deem your message important enough to sit up and listen to it.

Now, if you're likable, you've got a better shot at capturing their attention.

And, they are far more likely to remember what they've heard and see you as an authority in your field.

Let us revisit the Hawaii university research again.

When the university checked if likable teachers received good ratings because of their likability or because they in fact taught well, they found that

“students who perceive a teacher as likable, in contrast to those who do not, may be more attentive to the information that the teacher delivers, they’ll work harder on assignments, they’ll be more receptive to grading, and they will learn more.”

In other words, the positive feelings you invoke in other people, also as a professional, are returned to you.

This is called – ‘The Feedback Loop’. It influences your authority building as a professional.

You probably noticed the pattern in your professional life- and also in your personal life- when you try to give someone advice.

The more likable you are to the other person, the more positive your relationship is with that person, the more they seem to listen, and the more you feel your authority position.

Or in other words - you feel more certain that the other person intends to act on your advice.

To emphasize the power of likability in building your authority position as a professional and a better relationship with your clients, I will dare to say that a likable professional tends to be skilled in convincing others to act and helping them understand exactly what they need them to do.

Let me explain.

What Makes Someone Likable?

People prefer to say yes to those that they like.

This is the reason why Dr. Caldini describes it as one of the 6 Principles of Persuasion in his classic book “Influence”. He calls it the principle of “liking”.

But what makes someone likable?

Persuasion science tells us that there are three important factors.

(1) We like people who are similar to us.

(2) We like people who pay us compliments.

(3) And we like people who cooperate with us towards mutual goals.

Actually, it may surprise you to learn that the key to the liking principle isn’t so much about getting others to like us; it’s really about us coming to like them.

Too often people are concerned that building their authority means doing whatever it takes to get people to like them.

It is the opposite (!)

Please realize that if you genuinely like the person you’re with, that person will sense it and naturally reciprocate- at least in most cases.

So let me share with you a Super Simple Secret-

Your likability has an enormous impact on your perceived value.

So what's the straightforward secret to a better and faster route to build your authority?

Just be attentive and present.

We find those people who genuinely give us their full attention to be the most likable and charismatic.

As I prove in my bestselling book “The Attention Switch” - if you meet someone who is completely attentive to you and actively engaged in the conversation, you are much more likely to find them likable and interesting.

Why?

Because at that moment, the only thing that seems to matter to them is you. You are the most important person there, and they have gifted you with their most precious asset – their time.

The Power of Likability

There’s no doubt about it: Highly likable professionals have more and achieve more.

They have more business relationships.

They have more clients.

They get more work.

They retain more loyal clients.

You witnessed it yourself.

When an exceptionally likable professional walks into a room, people?want?to know them.

Correct?

Highly likable professionals are more?positive, open, charismatic,?and?influential.

Basically, every professional can become more likable.

This is not nice to have, it’s a need to have...

... And I believe each one of you can be one too.

Likability builds your relationships with your clients and colleagues.

Likability builds your authority position.

As you can see, the vital need to be recognized may be more controllable than you think.

Your personality will have as much to do with your recognition and building your authority, as your results or even your luck.

Develop your credibility, establish yourself as an expert, strive to be your most likable self and you'll quickly become the best and most obvious choice for clients to work with.

“Likability is the greatest predictor of popularity and social acceptance in a group for adults, more important than wealth, status or physical attractiveness.” – John Kinnell

It’s time to make likability a priority.

If you have any specific questions with regards to building your authority position and your personal brand or on building authentic relationships, please send us an e-mail and I will be happy to help.

Until the next edition, SWITCH ON and keep STANDING OUT!

PS> Subscribe to SWITCH ON with Itzik?to receive my next newsletter unpacking the secrets of ‘last impression’ as an important component of the art of building long-lasting business relationships.

PSS> As promised, to learn new practical ideas and strategies to grow your practice- Don't miss our 2nd edition of the #WomeninLaw Global Rainmakers Summit -?HERE?- [wilgrs.com] on 29-31 March 2022.

?? We will bring a handpicked lineup of 50+ world-class Women in Law rainmakers with successful legal and business experience together - including Women in Law thought leaders and experts, leaders of global legal networks and organizations, senior faculty and practitioners from the legal field for 3 days of learning and deep dialogue.

Warmly,

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Itzik is considered the global leading authority on business development, business networking & personal branding. He is a highly sought-after international speaker, trainer, business mentor, & attorney-at-law. He is also the bestselling author of “The Attention Switch” & Founder of THE SWITCH?? , the leading online training, and education platform for professionals globally. Itzik teaches, trains and mentors lawyers, other professionals, and firms to attract and win their ideal clients by becoming seen as authorities in their field, creating and maintaining successful and strategic relationships and learning to SWITCH their relations to referrals+revenue+results.

See more information: itzikamiel.com | THE SWITCH???or connect with Itzik via: [email protected]