Building Your Relationships - Dormant Ties
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Building Your Relationships - Dormant Ties

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In this edition, I want to challenge the common belief that maintaining active connections is necessary for relationships to be useful or relevant.

Instead, there is enough empirical evidence that dormant business relationships, if reestablished, can be a valuable source of knowledge.

Additionally, strong past ties can offer a combination of the benefits of both strong and weak current relationships, including efficiency, novelty, trust, and shared perspective.

I have no doubt that dormant ties as a valuable yet often overlooked source of social capital that is worth considering from a practical, strategic, and theoretical perspective for the growth of your professional practice.

"Dormant ties as a valuable yet often overlooked source of social capital"
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The term dormant ties come from a?paper published by Rutgers University professor Daniel Levin?in 2011.

Dr. Levin's research found that it is easier to reawaken dormant ties or relationships than to create new ones.

During the pandemic, I suggested to many of the professionals I mentor to do the same I have been doing. I just reconnected with many people from my past by simply calling them and asking them - “how are you doing?”.

I did not need anything from them. I did not try to sell them anything.

It was genuine reaching out to people you have not talked to in years and reconnecting and rekindling the relationship.

I can imagine that some of you think it is strange and?awkward?that you’re calling. In fact, many of my mentees thought the same.

But in fact, after following my advice, they found out that they were wrong.

The opposite happened.

Their connections thanked them for reaching out and reconnecting.

And I am sure you will do the same.

If someone sent you an email or even called you and said, “I was thinking of you today and wanted to know how you are doing,” would you say, “wow that person must be looking for something from me?”

I do not think so. I think you would probably be excited to hear from someone.

Right?

Practical Steps

In my work with many professionals and professional firms from all over the world about building winning client relationships, I share 5 steps on how to rejuvenate a relationship that is not as strong as it once was.

Let me share them with you:

Step #1: Find a Good Reason

So, before you go and try to rekindle those relationships that have been dormant, it's important to take a step back and ask yourself, "Is it really worth it?"

"Before you go and try to rekindle those relationships that have been dormant, it's important to take a step back and ask yourself, "Is it really worth it?"
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You see, sometimes the best thing to do is to just let certain things be and not try to rekindle old flames that may have fizzled out for a reason.

Whether it's because the other person was a bit of a handful to work with, or they did not pay your bills or whatever the case may be, it's important to consider if the effort is truly worth it.

But, if you do decide to give it a shot, it's also important to take a closer look at what caused the relationship to become dormant in the first place.

Was there a disagreement or a falling out? Was it simply a case of neglecting contact? Or, was there a misunderstanding?

Whatever the reason may be, it's important to understand it before you try to move forward.

And, of course, you also want to consider the motivating factor behind wanting to rejuvenate the relationship.

Is it for business reasons? Personal reasons? Whatever it may be, make sure that it's worth the investment of your time, money, and energy before you take the plunge.

Because, at the end of the day, it's all about making sure that the effort is truly worth it.

And it is up to you to decide!

Step #2: Think about the other

"When it comes to trying to bring a relationship back to life, it's not just about what you can gain, but also about what the other party can gain as well."
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When it comes to trying to bring a relationship back to life, it's not just about what you can gain, but also about what the other party can gain as well.

This is the key to making sure that the relationship not only comes back but it’s there to stay.

So, think about it this way, what can you offer that's new and improved? Maybe it's a product or service that you now offer that would better meet their needs than what you had before. Or, perhaps there was an issue with one of your staff members and you've made a change in personnel - that can be a game changer.

The point is, you want to be creative and find ways to make it worth their while to invest their time, money, and energy into rekindling the relationship. Because let's face it, the advantage of something new and fresh can bring a whole new dynamic to the table and create some great opportunities.

Step #3: Reassess

It's important to remember that things have likely changed for both parties and not just assume that everything is the way it used to be.

That's why, it's a good idea to take a step back and do an assessment of where the other party is now. What are their current needs? What are they looking for? By understanding their current situation, you can better explore new opportunities to help them.

And it's also important to be open to new possibilities that may not have existed before. Times change, and with that, new opportunities arise. So, don't limit yourself to the way things used to be, be open to new possibilities. It's all about being flexible and adaptable to change.

Step #4: Provide enormous value

In order to bring a relationship back to life, it's all about providing value, and not just any value, but value like never before.

"In order to bring a relationship back to life, it's all about providing value, and not just any value, but value like never before."
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So, think about it, what problems can you solve for them? How can you create new opportunities for them to grow their business?

By positioning yourself as a partner who is there to help them, you increase the chances of rejuvenating the relationship.

Tip: One of the best ways to add value is to think about how you can connect various members of your network with each other. As I teach many of my mentees when both parties win, they remember who brought them together, and that can only keep the spark of the relationship.

Step #5: Add Value Consistently

Just adding value once is not enough. Rejuvenating a relationship is not always an easy task, but one approach that can be effective is by providing value in a consistent and gradual manner.

This can be achieved by sharing for example relevant articles, curated content, links to videos, and other resources that align with the other party's current interests and needs.

By doing this, you are building trust and demonstrating your willingness to be of assistance, which can help in rekindling the relationship.

How to Start?

Let me share with you a really easy way to get started.

(a) Go to your LinkedIn profile and pull up your list of contacts.

(b) Pick a letter randomly.

(c) Go through your list of connections that begin with that letter and select 5-10 dormant connections that you want reach out to.

(d) You could send them an email or pick up the phone and call them. You can use a simple message saying, “I thought of you today and was wondering how you are doing.”

(e) Don’t expect everybody to reply to you. But some surely will. So, do not dwell on those that do not respond.

(f) With those who do respond, make some efforts to schedule a Zoom or a phone call (in some cases you may want to meet them face-to-face).

(g) Repeat!

When should you start?

Now.

Now is the time to reach out and?awaken dormant?ties, and be humble and vulnerable.

Oh, and once you’ve rejuvenated the relationship, keep it strong this time!

Imagine you keep this habit for 30 days. How many dormant connections will you wake up?

Are you willing to take action?

Please share your comments and input with me, I read every comment personally.


???Join my brand new online course “Networking with Results” [for a special price] here and get access to the content, community, and coaching you need to grow your practice or schedule a strategy call here.


If you have any specific questions with regard to building authentic relationships with clients, client retention, or referrals, please send us an e-mail and I will be happy to help.

Keep standing out,

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Itzik is considered the global leading authority on business development, business networking, client relationships, and personal branding. He is a highly sought-after international speaker, trainer, business mentor, & attorney-at-law. He is also the bestselling author of “The Attention Switch” & Founder of THE SWITCH?? , the leading online training, and education platform for professionals globally. Itzik teaches, trains, and mentors lawyers, other professionals, and professional firms to attract and win their ideal clients by becoming seen as authorities in their field, creating and maintaining successful and strategic relationships, and learning to SWITCH their relationships to referrals+revenue+results.

See more information: THE SWITCH?? | itzikamiel.com or connect with Itzik via: [email protected]

Itzik Amiel

International Business Development|Power Networker| Professional Public Speaker| BRIC international expansion expert

1 年

As research shows— “Dormant ties are great sources of unexpectedly novel insights. After all, just because people lose touch does not mean that they go into hibernation. Instead, they continue to encounter new and different experiences, observations and information, which makes them particularly valuable resources for information and advice. Reconnecting can tap into a wealth of knowledge that other people have discovered.” ?? read more in this edition!

Lori Donofrio-Galley

PR Consultant & Storytelling Facilitator

2 年

The concept of "dormant ties" and your recommended strategies to re-engage these connections are so related to intentional networking. As careers and businesses evolve, it seems natural to reach out to past contacts. In fact, sometimes, they will reach out to you, especially at a time when you share a significant announcement. It happened to me when I launched @The Right Angle Strategic Storytelling LLC. Past friends and former work associates sought out my strategic PR services. Thank you, Itzik Amiel. Always enjoy your posts.

Jo Joshi MSc

Founder & CEO | Female Founder | Tech Innovator | Travel Industry Expert | Mentor |

2 年

Great post ??

Lisa Hammett, CPQC

A Champion for Obliterating Burnout in Healthcare & HR | Transformational Keynote & TEDx Speaker | Author | Certified PQ Coach | Mental Fitness * Wellness Coach

2 年

Always great reading your posts Itzik!

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