Building a Strong Foundation through Elimination

We spend much of our life trying to optimize our present condition by adding more of the things we want into our life. If we want more money, we work on getting a promotion. If we want a bigger house, we save up for a downpayment. If we want a family vacation, we book a trip to Bermuda.

But, all this focus on adding and optimizing may not lead to the picture-perfect life that we imagine it to be. Why? Because we don't spend any time working to fix or eliminate the things that are dragging us down. It's the equivalent of trying to build a glamorous mansion without taking a moment to ensure the strength of the foundation. If the foundation is weak, that beautiful mansion, that you worked so hard to build, may collapse when the first storm rolls through.

To strengthen the foundation of our life we must start fixing (and eventually eliminating) the bad habits that may be dragging us down before we try to build our mansion. One exercise I've found helpful in identifying these bad habits comes from executive coach & entrepreneur, Jerry Colonna . Jerry challenges us to think through one question that can help us identify the gaps and shortcomings in our own life.

Jerry recommends we take out a piece of paper and write the following question at the top of our page: "How am I complicit in creating the conditions I don't want?" Then, take 5-minutes to list out at least ten answers to this question.

To give you an idea of how it works, below are my answers to this prompt:

Question: How am I complicit in creating the conditions I don't want?

1. I check emails too many times a day
2. I stress about the small things
3. I over-accommodate for others at my own expense
4. I (occasionally) work on the weekends
5. I always think about work on the weekends
6. I'm not the best communicator of my emotions
7. I say yes to projects that don't excite me
8. I spend too much time trying to make money vs. spending more time with loved ones
9. I put too much weight on my career & personal success
10. I spend too much time daydreaming about the future

After you complete the exercise, reflect on what you've written. Then, circle or highlight one item that you'd like to work on fixing or eliminating from your life. If you're having trouble deciding, perhaps ask yourself this question: "Which item, if corrected, could create the biggest positive change in my life?"

Finally, once you've selected an item to work on, brainstorm one way in which you could make a change this week. Next week, return to your list and note your progress. Like any rebuild, it'll take time to make changes, but the upside is tremendous.

Building a beautiful life isn't possible if we don't first eliminate the conditions and habits that are dragging us down.

Work on creating a sturdy foundation first.

Then build your mansion.