Building Resilience - you don’t have to climb ev'ry mountain!

My wife and I recently enjoyed a short break in the beautiful and historic city of Edinburgh.

On the last day, we decided to put on our walking boots and climb up Arthur’s Seat, a dormant volcano which is the highest of Edinburgh's seven hills, so we could take in its spectacular panoramic views of the city.

It was cold but dry and it hadn’t snowed during our stay so we thought it would be a pleasant hike. Although it's classified as a hill (251m/823 feet), it soon had us thinking that we’d given ourselves a mountain to climb.

We’d been making good progress but, as we got closer to the top, the wind picked up and the stepped path suddenly became narrower with a steep fall on one side and rocks on the other. Not great for someone with a fear of heights. Worryingly, the pathway also became increasingly slippy until it turned into a sheet of black ice.

Skating on thin ice

My nerve started to desert me as I lost my balance and ended up on the floor. I couldn’t stand up despite several slapstick attempts, and I was genuinely worried that I was going to fall over the edge or end up doing the splits for the first time in my life. It felt like I was re-living my one and only trip to an ice rink where I’d spent most of the time holding on to the side whilst doing my best impression of Bambi!

When I considered my options, I was left clutching at straws (well, the tiny tufts of grass that were sticking out of the rocks). I realised that I couldn’t go any further, so I started edging sideways on my knees and then, throwing all dignity aside, I proceeded to slide and bump down the steps on my backside. I literally escaped by the seat of my pants! My wife, who was just behind me, decided to go down backwards on all fours!

Thankfully, there weren’t too many witnesses to our embarrassing and less-than-hasty retreat, although there was a jogger coming back down who slipped on the same patch of black ice and also ended up on his backside!

I breathed a sigh of relief when we eventually reached a wider part of the pathway and we were able to stand up again. Thinking on our feet, we decided to continue our descent via an alternative route that had steeper steps but wasn’t as slippy.

We’d checked with a local who was on her way up and she said we’d be fine providing we exercised caution. We warned her that it was icy further up, but she just gave us a ‘no sh*t Sherlock’ look as she continued her ascent.

We managed to get back down safely without any further hiccups, but we’d ended up on the other side of the hill - about a mile away from our starting point!

The Englishman who went up a hill but slid down a mountain!

I was too focused on self-preservation to think about anything else at the time, but when we were back on terra firma regaining our composure over a pot of tea, I was able to reflect on the resilience we’d shown and thought it would be a good topic for an article.

I immediately came up with the above strap line by tweaking the title of a ‘90s film starring Hugh Grant and Tara Fitzgerald.

I thought an article would help me to process what had happened, learn from the experience, and commit to print my resolve to reach the summit next time. We’re determined to give it a go when the conditions are more favourable and we're better prepared. I want to prove that I’m not over the hill by getting over that hill!

Ironically, I’d been singing the Sound of Music classic “Climb ev’ry mountain” in the shower that morning in na?ve anticipation of our trip up Arthur’s Seat. With the benefit of hindsight, a more appropriate song would have been Chumbawamba’s ‘90s anthem, Tubthumping, with its defiant lyrics that could be the battle cry for the resilience party:

I get knocked down, but I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down.

Our climb was quite a scary experience - you should’ve seen the size of my skid marks! I wouldn’t say that my life flashed before my eyes, but it did make me reflect on some of the uphill battles and slippery slopes that I’ve faced.

In’t being resilient brilliant?!

The Oxford Dictionary defines resilience as "the ability to recover quickly after something unpleasant, such as shock, injury, etc."

I’ve recovered from two major head and neck operations, in my 20s and 40s, and had to make some life-changing adjustments. I genuinely feel that those setbacks have made me a stronger and more resilient person. They’ve also helped me to put the subsequent challenges I’ve faced during my career into perspective.

I’ve had to deal with unexpected redundancy, the end of short-term contracts, toxic cultures, and I left one organisation because we had polarised views regarding its future strategy.

Each time, I’ve left on good terms with my head held high and without the relationship going downhill, and I’ve found the subsequent job hunt to be slightly less daunting than the previous one.

Similarly, I’ve also had to tackle major incidents affecting people, systems, and buildings - each successive event has been a bit easier to manage as I’ve encountered fewer surprises or first-time situations.

Having said that, I’d assert that you can still gain experience from every challenge you face and use it to improve your ability to bounce back, but sometimes you might find that it’s a steep learning curve!

Building resilience - rolling your Rs

I’ve split my approach for building resilience into the following set of steps - the eight Rs:

1. Recognise - develop self-awareness and your ability to spot stress triggers, warning signs, pointless situations, and impossible tasks.
2. Review - assess the situation, consider your options, and draw from your experience bank. Determine whether fight or flight is the best response.
3. Refer - build strong working relationships and support networks, and don’t be afraid to reach out for their help, advice, and feedback.
4. React - be decisive, not impulsive, and take the most appropriate action. Acknowledge your limitations and be prepared to withdraw 'gracefully', compromise, or move on - you don't have to climb every mountain first time!
5. Relax - find ways to unwind after a tough ordeal, recharge your batteries, and look after your physical health.
6. Reflect - assess why the issue arose and process it. Keep things in perspective - don't make a mountain out of a molehill! Stay positive - congratulate yourself for getting through it and accept that the experience will make you stronger.
7. Record - identify the learning points from your near misses, failures, and successes, and add the wisdom to your memory bank for future reference.
8. Reboot - prepare yourself for your next challenge, and get ready to call upon and demonstrate your bouncebackability.

I've summarised my 8 Rs for building resilience on a slide - I hope you find it useful. Please click on this link to view it on SlideShare.

So, if you can build your resilience levels, you won’t have to “climb ev’ry mountain ‘till you find your dream”, but you may need to follow a few different paths or byways!