Building

Introduction

Winston Churchill said, “To build may have to be the slow and laborious task of years. To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day.”

If the intent to destroy is purposeful, it may not even take that long.

Let me tell you a personal story that illustrates this.

My wife and I really enjoyed our across-the-back-alley neighbors. They were a retired couple, frequently visited by their extended family members. As the years went by, their lifestyle changed. They decided to downsize and sell. They had a very attractive, serviceable home. My wife and I knew it would sell quickly.

After the sale, some time passed. One morning, I was having coffee on the back patio before heading to work, and I heard heavy equipment starting up. Then I heard a crash-boom-bang not normally associated with our residential neighborhood. I went to the alley and to my surprise, a bulldozer was running through the exterior walls of the house. Ninety minutes later, there was nothing but rubble where an attractive and serviceable home had once stood.

The clean up of the lot took a couple of more days, and then the property sat idle for months. When the developer started to build anew, it took more than a year to complete the job. The new house was twice as big as the old house. A taller fence, modern appointments, and an electric gate.

I like the new neighbors; I even like the new house. Every time I go in the back alley, I am constantly reminded of the fact that it is easier to destroy than to build. It makes me sad to think of something attractive, serviceable, and very functional replaced by something newer and bigger. In my view, it illustrates both the good and bad of capitalism at once. Some would call it progress. Some would call it wasteful. It is clearly a sign of the times that I am older than I think I am.

Body

There are some other things besides houses that take longer to build than to destroy.

Reputations. Relationships. Physical Health and Wellbeing.

It can all change in an instant.

Reputations

According to Businessman Jeff Bezos, “A brand for a company is like a reputation for a person. You earn reputation by doing hard things well.”

Arthur Anderson and Enron. Devastating to shareholders.

OJ Simpson and Legal Troubles. Unbelievable to football fans, fatal and life-changing to some.

Richard Nixon and Watergate. Damaging to the country.

These three examples show how fragile a reputation can be.

Contemplate your own reputation, your own brand. How have you defined success for yourself? Does the way you spend your time reflect the building and grooming of your reputation? Is your reputation strong enough to weather any of the storms brought ashore by career, family, or community?

There are many temptations out there, calling to us to disregard the building we have done, waiting for the opportunity to destroy our reputations without a second thought.

We protect our reputations through careful thought and considerations of the actions we undertake and the choices we make. We think through the likely outcomes and impacts. We make choices that help us build.

Relationships

Actor Henry Winkler said, “Assumptions are the termites of relationships.”

Jennifer Anniston and Brad Pitt. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Schriver. Al and Tipper Gore.

Shocking the public, Surprising the public, and surely painful to them and their friends and families.

These three examples show how fragile a relationship can be.

Consider your own important relationships. It is not just spouses and significant others. Family relationships. Friend relationships. Professional relationships.  How have you defined happiness in those relationships? Does the way you spend your time reflect the caring and commitment to your relationship? Is your relationship strong enough to support you through the inevitable valley’s life forces you to walk through?

There are many distractions out there, vying for our attention, taking away from the foundation of our relationships, driving a wedge between the parties at every opportunity.

As we did with reputations, we likewise protect our relationships through careful thought and considerations of the actions we undertake and the choices we make. We think through the likely outcomes and impacts. We make choices that help us build and sustain.

Physical Health and Wellbeing

 “We know a great deal more about the causes of physical disease than we do about the causes of physical health.”, noted Psychologist M. Scott Peck.

Life is a wonderful gift we have been given. It is ours to make the most of it. To make the most of it, we must achieve and maintain our physical health and wellbeing. We must take care of ourselves first, before we can take care of our reputations and relationships. We are fortunate to have a lot of information and assistance available to us via the internet.

Diet. Exercise. Sleep.

We are what we eat. A nutritious, balanced diet is the fuel and the building blocks of our bodies. We all know people whose diets are out-of-balance, and it is easy to tell when our own diet is out-of-balance. It helps to have an eating plan, and to not put things in the pantry that are contributors to those out-of-balance conditions. It is not hard to eat a little healthier, cook a little healthier, live a little healthier. It is just different, and it requires us to make different choices.

Most of us are not in training to be professional athletes, and most of us do not need an exhaustive regimen of physical activities. Moderate exercise a few times a week is well within the framework of our busy lives. I count myself among the many who could do a little better in this department. It is hard to be a hardbody, it is not hard to walk 30 minutes three times a week. It is just different, and it requires us to make different choices.

A good night’s sleep is a big contributor to a successful professional day. The brain needs time to process the day’s events, regroup and recharge. We all know what it is like to be over-tired, to try and work through a headache, to power through a day after a late night the night before. It’s no fun, it’s not healthy, and in many cases, it can be a threat to your reputation, your relationships, and your health and wellbeing.

There is always more to do than there is time to do it, so making the time to sleep well is a choice that must be made to maintain our physical Health and wellbeing. Does the way you spend your time reflect your commitment to physical health and wellbeing?

Close

My main point in this article is that it is easier to destroy than to build.

I believe that most of us are builders, builders of reputation, builders of relationships, builders of our own personal health and wellbeing.

If we examine the way we spend our time in these areas, we can learn a lot about the effectiveness of our building strategies. I’m certain we can all do at least a little bit better.

To circle back around to the Winston Churchill quote, “To build may have to be the slow and laborious task of years. To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day.”

We spend a lifetime building. If we look back over our own personal histories, it is an amazing investment we have made. It is an amazing accomplishment we have achieved. Yet it is still unfinished business. 

As we have gleaned from the examples above – it can all change in an instant, and it is up to us to protect ourselves from those instants of temptation and distraction.