Building Bonds Beyond Work: The Power of Personal Sharing in Teams

Creating a work environment where team members feel comfortable sharing aspects of their personal lives, within professional boundaries, is a subtle art.

And it all comes down to ‘trust’ and ‘psychological safety’.

This week, we delve into strategies that help your team build bonds and understanding.

[5-minute read]

THIS WEEK'S HIGH-PERFORMANCE BEHAVIOUR

"It's comfortable for team members to openly discuss their personal lives with each other."

Why is this behaviour vital?

• Builds Trust: Sharing personal stories fosters a deeper level of trust, empathy, and inclusiveness among team members.
• Enhances Team Cohesion: Personal connections can transform a group of individuals into a cohesive team, united by mutual respect and understanding.
• Supportive Environment: Knowing more about each other’s backgrounds and life experiences can lead to a more supportive and accommodating work atmosphere.

Consider Ella’s Story:

Ella, a key developer at a tech company, faced a pivotal challenge: lead a breakthrough project that promised enormous career growth, or support her family through her father's illness.

In her previous company, Ella witnessed a leader have a severe anxiety attack mid-project, and it later came out that they’d been facing significant challenges at home.

The culture in that previous company was to “keep your personal problems at home”.

Ella was torn.

She knew she was able to create a success of the project.

But she also knew she couldn’t do it without support.

She sat at her desk, feeling heavy from the risk of losing a monumental career opportunity.

Confronted with this dilemma, Ella made a decision: to share her situation with her team.

She learnt a valuable lesson.

Her new leaders didn’t believe in separating the “person” from the “work”. They empathised with her situation.

They gave Ella the opportunity to lead the project, and instead of dropping the high standards expected of her, they provided a forum for support.

The team devised creative solutions, enabling her to contribute remotely and maintain her commitments to her ill father, without sacrificing the project's momentum.

This approach not only preserved the project but deepened the team's unity, proving that personal challenges could be met with collective strength.

Ella’s story highlights the power of vulnerability and teamwork, reinforcing that compassion and empathy are invaluable in helping team members bring their best work.

BEHAVIOUR DRIVERS

It’s terrible when team members don’t feel safe enough to discuss their personal lives (within appropriate boundaries) because opportunities to support each other are missed.

Encouraging team members to open up about their personal lives involves addressing and reshaping certain perceptions that might inhibit this sharing.

LIMITING ASSUMPTIONS

? "Personal issues might distract from work objectives." This assumption suggests that discussing personal life at work could hinder productivity and focus.

? "Addressing personal challenges can improve overall team performance." Recognising and supporting each other through personal challenges can lead to a more supportive and productive work environment.

? "It’s unprofessional to show vulnerability in the workplace." The idea that professionals must always appear strong and in control can inhibit genuine interactions.

? "Vulnerability leads to stronger connections among team members." Allowing oneself to be vulnerable can build trust and promote a deeper understanding among colleagues.

? "People will use personal information against me." This fear can create a barrier to open communication due to concerns about privacy and trust.

? "A culture of respect and confidentiality encourages safe sharing." Cultivating an atmosphere where personal information is handled with respect and discretion can foster a safe space for sharing.

? "Team members prefer to keep interactions strictly business." This assumption may be based on a misperception of colleagues’ preferences and discourage personal exchanges.

? "Most people appreciate knowing and relating to their colleagues as whole persons." Encouraging team members to share personal insights can enhance interpersonal relations and collaboration.

? "Others might not be interested in my personal life." The fear of being irrelevant can keep team members from sharing.

? "Sharing personal stories fosters mutual interest and empathy." Demonstrating genuine interest in each other’s lives encourages a culture of care.

? "Discussing personal matters is inappropriate." Concerns about overstepping boundaries can prevent openness.

? "A respectful and trusting environment makes sharing appropriate." Establishing clear boundaries ensures that sharing enhances, rather than detracts from, team cohesion.

HIGH-PERFORMANCE TEAM EXERCISE

Build a more open team culture with this exercise:

1. Begin with a conversation about the importance of getting to know each other beyond work-related tasks.
2. Introduce a “sharing circle” where team members are invited to share something personal, such as a hobby, a recent trip, or a significant life event, in a casual and relaxed setting.
3. Ensure that each member has the opportunity to speak, and emphasise listening with empathy and without judgement.
4. Discuss how this exercise affected the team's feeling of connectedness and understanding of one another.
5. Agree to incorporate regular opportunities for personal sharing into team routines, reinforcing the value of these connections.

This exercise aims to normalise and encourage openness, transforming your team into a more connected and empathetic unit.

I'd love to hear how encouraging personal sharing impacts your team's dynamics. Please share your experiences or any feedback!

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Always here to support your journey towards a more open and connected team,

Your coach & friend,