Bring IT On!!!

One thing I know in life is that it's not an easy ride, no matter how much we would all like to just be happy and for it to just be easy, sorry to say that's a pipe dream and not reality.

From the age of 5, as a petite, brown curly haired, small innocent little girl I learnt that people can be shit.

I learnt that I had to pretend to be fearless, to not be hurt by the bullies that would lay in wait for me, the ones that would gang together and taunt my name - cos it was a boys name, or my clothes, because my Mum made them, (which I loved by the way).

Going to school was a test for me every day, at the age of 7 I remember, I'd sit in the class and when the bell went at 3 o'clock I run to the back of the class as fast as I could to get the hell out, before Nadine and her cronies could get to me, I'd run across the school hall, and out of the glass fronted doors and out past the bike sheds and down the slope to the school gates, where Ronnie, my Mum's friend would always be to pick up her kids, I knew if I got to her I could walk home in safety, and ignore the name calling and abuse.

It didn't end there, in senior school till the age of 15, every morning I would run to school early, so I could be there to hide in a doorway, where the caretaker would open up and my teacher would be in early and I'd sit in class for safety.

Going home wasn't so easy, every night I would walk and Nadine the aggressor would literally prod and poke me in the back and many times would want a fight, so I would turn round and fight her, I never threw the first punch, I would let her go first and then I'd go in, my heart thumping and - most of the time worrying about getting mud on my clothes, for which my mum would go mad about.

I never told anyone, my Mum and Dad never knew, until Nadine up'd her game and started appearing on at my front door, and threatening my brother and sister. As the oldest, I would again fight her off.

Even as I write this I have tears running down my face, I am 55 for gods sake and this still hurts like hell, but do you know what, I can honestly say now - after a lot of soul searching and working on this stuff, I can thank Nadine and the rest of the cowards that followed her lead, because that ability to face into what ever shit she decided she was going to put me through, for over ten years, to pretend to feel confident, to pretend to be fearless, to be determined that she would not make me cry, to have the tenacity to get up, every time I was knocked down and face the next day again, never knowing when or if it would ever stop, has served me well.

In my career when I faced the pale, stale male's - short, fat, angry men - and a few more bitches, and over the last 12 years in business when the shit has really hit the fan, I know, no matter what happens I will get through it, I will always get back up and I will always have confidence and tenacity, even if, now and again, I know I am still faking it!!!!!

My motto for me and now my clients - Step Forward Into Growth In Every Moment...

And the Picture on my office wall is my reminder... of my journey and of my greatest virtues... zest and courage - see below...

OMMS - Obstacles Make Me Stronger...

Bring It On...

Tx