Breaking Free from Fear, Doubt and Setbacks
It’s rare that life follows a smooth pathway and, if you’ve had to face any kind of setback, you’re probably all too familiar with the self-doubts that follow in the wake of defeat. It’s as if we accept the setbacks as evidence that our lives are not supposed to follow a straight and even pathway. Many of us see our problems as inevitable and interpret then as evidence that we’re not really supposed to succeed. And this is the kind of attitude that persuades many to quit or reduce their efforts – because they don’t believe their goals and dreams are achievable.
The real problem is that the doubts were already there, lurking unseen, hidden beneath the surface, just waiting for something to go wrong before they could emerge like unwanted guests at a wedding feast, fully intent on spoiling everything and demolishing our dreams.
The fact is – we all have doubts. The challenge is to recognise them in advance and limit their potentially damaging influence upon our lives.
Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. ― William Shakespeare
The origins of our doubts and disabling beliefs can often be traced to those early childhood days when we were taught not to expect too much from life. It was an innocent attempt to protect us from disappointment. But, if you grew up in a family that was suspicious of money – and especially suspicious of anyone who had any kind of wealth – it probably seems completely natural to feel uncomfortable around financial success. These early, conditioned behaviours sowed the seeds of doubt and called our precious ambitions into question. We feel excluded from the ranks of those ‘others’ who seem destined to achieve everything their hearts desired.
This is the real problem with doubt. It feeds into our insecurities and silently erodes our confidence. It confirms our deep-set fears and mocks our ambitions. It whispers darkly in the depths of our hearts and reminds us that we’ll never truly be worthy of success. One minor setback and we throw up our arms in despair and quit the race. Because ‘it was never meant to be.’ This is the truly poisonous effect of doubt that seeks to undermine our efforts and derail our plans. This is when you need someone to challenge your disabling views and help you get back on track.
?Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.
― Suzy Kassem
The first step is to recognise that these doubts exist. The antidote, however, is not to adopt a blind and unquestioning certainty. We still need to retain our healthy degree of cynicism. We need to be free to question anything that crosses our path. But the deeper doubts that question our worthiness need to be exposed and uprooted and neutralised. The best clue to these largely hidden aspects of our personalities can be found in the way we frame our emotional responses.
When you ask yourself how you really feel about success, for example, you might be surprised to discover unexpected feelings about the people who’ve achieved major success in their lives. Any hint of jealousy, resentment or a burning sense of injustice will reveal insights into how you really feel about success. When you feel comfortable about success in other people’s lives, you’re more likely to feel comfortable about success in your own. The same principle applies to the delicate subjects of money and financial reward. As you identify any discordant feelings about your goals and ambitions, you’ll be able to take steps to free yourself from their pernicious influence. Having a mentor or a professional coach on hand to challenge your negative outlook can be immensely helpful in restoring your confidence and encouraging you to get back to your quest for success.
Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.
-?????? Dale Carnegie
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Many people have resolved the stubbornness of their deeper doubts by adopting a simple but powerful personal mantra to repeat throughout the day. It usually involves regular repetition of a phrase that declares in simple but direct terms that the individual is truly worthy of happiness, success and financial reward. These new, emotionally-driven declarations gradually filter into the subconscious and provide a more positive framework for future behaviour. Problems and setbacks still show up. That’s the nature of life. The difference is that the problems are now accepted as the natural by-products of any attempt that will help you make progress towards your goals.
Once you begin to exorcise your doubts, the problems will no longer have any power to deter you from your dreams. They will no longer be able to trigger your doubts and fears. You’ll be free to focus your energy on resolving and removing the obstacles that you’re bound to encounter along your pathway. Your determination, confidence and commitment will now remain perfectly intact.
Kill the snake of doubt in your soul, crush the worms of fear in your heart
and mountains will move out of your way.
-?????? Kate Seredy
Many have discovered that the best antidote to their fears is to take the next step forward and let action be their guide along their chosen pathway and the elimination of doubt. Nurturing a feeling of confidence and a deep belief in your ability to overcome the odds and succeed against life’s inevitable challenges have always been the hallmarks of success. Make today the day when you banish the shadows that doubt that would hold you back from your true potential. Break free. Smile in the face of adversity. Look to your heart and feel the reassuring power of absolute belief in your worthiness to fulfil your dreams and ambitions.
An exciting and inspiring future awaits you beyond the noise in your mind, beyond the guilt, doubt, fear, shame, insecurity and heaviness of the past you carry around.
-?????? Debbie Ford
If you enjoy these blogs, you can imagine how much fun it is to have Greg in the room as an inspirational and highly perceptive speaker. If you’d like to invite Greg to talk to your company or organisation or event, either in person or via a live link on the Internet, feel free to get in touch.
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