Breaking Free from the Comparison Trap: Social Media and Goal-Setting

In a world where everyone’s life seems perfectly polished and curated online, setting and achieving personal goals can feel like an uphill battle. Social media can be a double-edged sword, it inspires AND motivates, but it can also foster self-doubt and unhealthy comparisons.

As I wrote in SMASH IT!, self-comparison is a natural part of being human, and, at its best, it can push us to do better. Festinger’s social comparison theory supports this idea, showing that comparing ourselves to those achieving what we aspire to can inspire us to believe our goals are attainable. I’ve certainly had my fair share of positive role models, both online and in real life, who’ve shown me what’s possible.

But here’s the thing: without clear boundaries, social media can have the opposite effect.

Constantly scrolling through highlight reels can demotivate and discourage you, leading to a sense of "I'm not good enough" or "I'm not worthy enough", "They're doing better than I am". It’s easy to forget that social media is just that—a reel. As my Mum used to say, “No one knows what goes on behind closed doors.” That person flaunting their dream life on Instagram might return their rented Maserati only to go back to their parents’ box room.

Your goals and resolutions shouldn’t be shaped by someone else’s curated story. They should be about you. After all, the only person you’re really competing with is...... yourself.

Finding Balance: Using Social Media as a Tool, Not a Trap

This doesn’t mean you should abandon social media altogether—it’s about using it intentionally. Platforms like Instagram or LinkedIn can be excellent sources of inspiration, but only if you remain mindful of how they affect your mindset.

1. Follow the Right People: Curate your feed to include accounts that genuinely uplift and inspire you. Unfollow or mute anyone whose content leaves you feeling “less than.”
2. Set Boundaries: Limit your time online, especially during vulnerable moments when self-comparison might creep in.
3. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection: Celebrate small wins and remind yourself that no one’s journey is as effortless as it might appear online.

The Power of Sharing Goals in the Right Environment

Sharing your goals can be a powerful motivator when done thoughtfully and in the right context. While social media often turns personal achievements into public performances, opening up about your aspirations in supportive environments can amplify your chances of success.

Here’s how sharing your goals in the right way can help you thrive:

1. Authentic Accountability: Sharing your goals with trusted individuals—whether close friends, mentors, or a like-minded community—creates a sense of accountability that is rooted in support rather than judgment.
2. Collaborative Energy: Discussing your resolutions with others can lead to new insights, fresh ideas, and unexpected solutions. A collaborative environment allows you to see possibilities you might not have considered on your own.
3. Reinforced Motivation: Speaking your goals aloud solidifies your commitment and helps you stay focused. It’s not about seeking validation but about creating a tangible connection to your aspirations.

Resolutions Are for You

Remember, this isn’t a competition to outdo someone else’s life or follow trends you see online. Your resolutions are yours, and the real joy comes from smashing them on your own terms.

It’s time to stop letting social media dictate your goals or your worth.

At SMASH IT!? Live, you’ll get the clarity, tools, and motivation to focus on what truly matters: smashing your own goals in your own way. Forget the filters, the followers, and the comparisons—this is your chance to reset, refocus, and reignite your passion for living the life you want, all in a safe environment of supporters.

Join us on January 16th, and let’s smash it together!