Break the Sorry Cycle

Have you ever prefaced your thoughts in a conversation with "I'm sorry"?

It's a common habit, especially when we believe we've caused an inconvenience. While "I'm sorry" is meant to show consideration, frequent apologies may inadvertently weaken our impact as a leader and our leadership presence.

A 2021 study by Harvard Business Review highlights that habitual apologizing, particularly among professionals, can project a lack of confidence, potentially undermining their competence in the workplace. Instead, turning apologies into expressions of gratitude can boost our self-esteem and enhance perceptions of our competence and reliability.

Sounds too simple right? Just last week, I had to reschedule a podcast interview at the last minute. When we reconnected, saying "I'm sorry" was on the tip of my tongue. And right when I started with "I'm", I held my breath and rather than apologizing, I expressed, "Thank you so much for your flexibility and understanding." This shift from fault to gratitude really transformed our interaction.

In this week's newsletter, I wanted to give you some info and practical strategies on how and why you should shift from apologizing:

1?? Acknowledge Instead of Apologize

Instead of saying, "Sorry I’m late," try, "Thank you for waiting for me."

McKinsey research from 2020 supports that this positive framing makes us appear more composed and respectful, thus encouraging more collaborative interactions.

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2?? Reflect Before You Regret

Pause before defaulting to an apology. Assess if it's genuinely warranted. This not only reduces unnecessary apologies but also enhances your presence.

According to the American Psychological Association (2020), leaders who exhibit this level of self-awareness are more adept at managing teams and navigating complex workplace dynamics.

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3?? Gratitude as a Growth Strategy

When feedback or criticism comes your way, try responding with, "Thank you for your feedback—I’ll consider this moving forward." This response not only shows strength in accepting growth opportunities.

Stanford University’s 2019 study revealed that individuals who approach feedback with gratitude are more likely to advance professionally and engage in continuous learning.

Every phrase we utter can either extend an image of competence or compromise. By opting for gratitude over guilt, we not only affirm our self-respect but also elevate our interactions.?

This week, take up the challenge to replace three routine apologies with expressions of gratitude. Notice the shift in your interactions and self-perception.

As always, I LOVE hearing from you… what are you taking from today’s content?

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