Break Biases through Optimism

This year’s International Women’s Day (IWD) theme is Break the Bias. My take on the theme is that we should break the bonds of negativity within us so that we can break the biases that surround us. It’s 2022, yet a world that is diverse, equitable, and inclusive is still far from reality for many women and young girls. With so much happening around the world and around us, it can feel overwhelming. I strongly believe that an antidote to all that is optimism. Optimism is a habit we can build and a path we can take, and optimism is how we tackle one day at a time, one bias and one barrier at a time.?

The COVID-19 pandemic has been especially tough on many women. In many cases, a woman's role as caregiver has been amplified. Our caring instincts are heightened, and may I say, for me personally, I go into overdrive being the protective mama bear taking care of our children, family, our teams and our friends to keep them safe.?

All this caring and giving can take a toll on us, physically and mentally, and we are expected to perform our best wherever we are - professionally and personally. It is important to realize that performance is linked to well-being. The saying “you can’t pour from an empty cup” is very true. Well-being is greatly linked to optimism and our outlook on life. And I’d like to share with you three suggestions on how we might progress towards this path of optimism:?

Our self-worth is not based on the roles we play?

I mentioned above that we wear many hats as women but we are not solely defined by those roles we play. When we do not distinguish ourselves from the roles we play, be it at work or at home, we tend to sacrifice all of ourselves to fulfill that role. For example, if we conflate our identity with our job, our success at our job becomes the measure of our self-worth and happiness. We then tend to take things personally if something goes wrong at work. Identifying less with our role will allow us? to live into the multiple roles we play more fully and happily, and achieve a level of resilience that will enable us to perform well while maintaining a healthy sense of self.

For more on this, I recommend reading the article “When Your Job Is Your Identity, Professional Failure Hurts More” by Timothy O'Brien.?

Let’s practise optimism mindfully?

Notice the word ‘practise’ being used here - yes, being optimistic is something that we need to train ourselves to do. Being pessimistic and always guarded was useful when we lived as cavemen/cavewomen defending ourselves in the wild, where danger lurked in every corner. In today’s world? Not so much. Studies show that optimism is 25% inheritable, but it is something that we can train ourselves to do and be better at. Not to confuse optimism with happiness, being optimistic is about choosing how you respond (vs react) to stressors. I believe that if we flex our optimism muscles mindfully, we will be more resilient in dealing with different situations and whatever curve ball life throws at us. I recommend you to check out ‘Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life’ by Martin E. P. Seligman and ‘Optimism, pessimism and mental health: a twin/adoption analysis’ by Plomin et al.

Exercise both our bodies and mind

Last year, I had a rude awakening after a routine health check. My health was far from ideal. More than that, I had not made the connection on how much my physical health can affect my mental state. I think we all need to find a routine and regime that works for each of us, because not everyone has the commitment or determination to clock the recommended 10,000 steps a day, or hit the gym every day. But the point is to start somewhere, and establish a rhythm that sets you on the right path to wellness. I know of many who work out every morning, not just because it is good for their body but also because it makes us feel sharper and helps us start the day in a better mood!?

This is not meant to be a fool-proof guide nor is it a guide just for women - I wanted to share what has helped a worry-wart like me transform into a more optimistic and resilient person. As we celebrate this year’s International Women’s Day, breaking biases and barriers in an ever challenging world, take care of your own self first before others. And we can all emerge stronger.?

Happy IWD!?

With Heart,

Chin Yin?