A Boy, A Sloth & A Forever Bond

Wyatt was 10 years old when he died of brain cancer.

He was my daughter’s best friend.

On that day, 5 years ago, my daughter’s heart shattered for the second time.

The first time was when she lost her twin brother.

Two HUGE losses.

One 11-year-old girl.

And a grief so palpable you could almost touch it.

As her mom, I couldn’t take away her pain - and boy did I want to!

SHE had to feel it.

SHE had to go through the emotional pain that rips your heart in two and turns your world upside down.

I could only be there for her, loving her, supporting her.

It was her grief journey.

And, man, did I learn a LOT from her ??

My daughter, Lily, was a warrior.

She faced her grief head on and allowed her feelings to be there, to cry, to hug, to remember.

She grieved like any child would grieve…with full abandon and honesty.

She wasn’t old enough to “know” she needed to hide her feelings or pretend she was OK.

And on the Monday after Wyatt’s death, when she came home from school and told me that she had written her speech to say at Wyatt’s funeral, I wasn’t really surprised.

That’s who she is.

He was her best friend and she was going to honour him.

And honour him she did ??

In front of two packed rooms of people, with tears streaming down her face, Lily shared her memories of Wyatt, how much she loved him, and how she was glad that he wouldn’t be alone in heaven…he would have her brother with him.

Not a dry eye in the place.

It was THE most beautiful and heartfelt moment and meant so much to Wyatt’s parents.

To make sure that a part of Lily stayed with Wyatt, his parents put her hand-written speech in his casket so he would always know how much he meant to her.

Her, and his sloths ??

His most favourite animal E.V.E.R.

A couple of his favourite stuffed sloths made it into his casket, too.

He was most definitely not going to be alone on the next step of his journey.

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To this day, Lily still talks about Wyatt and has pictures of the two of them on her desk.

She’s 16 now.

Sometimes we cry when we talk about him.

Sometimes we laugh hysterically remembering his unfiltered sense of humour and unbridled joy as he drove his electric cars around the field with wild abandon.

Wyatt is always in her heart and she will never forget him.

But she is LIVING her life with so much joy, happiness and laughter.

Wyatt’s death didn’t break her.

It certainly left a mark, but she is not defined by it.

Lily approached her grief the way it should be approached - honestly, fiercely, and with full authenticity.

She taught me that it is OK - and necessary - to grieve whole-heartedly.

For the only way forward, is through.

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With today being World Cancer Day, I wanted to share their story, to honour both Wyatt’s passing and Lily’s survival.

…’cause it is a heart-stopper ??

Cancer can rip us apart and leave us ragged, beaten and emotionally depleted.

It is a grief that can be experienced on so many levels.

I hope Lily & Wyatt’s story inspired hope for you, as it did for me, that moving forward with your grief does not mean forgetting.

It means LIVING.

YOU are worth it!

M. xo

P.S. If you are struggling to move forward after grief, and are ready to start taking those steps, I am here to support you. ?Book a short call, send me a message or email - [email protected] and let’s explore what that support might look like.