Boy Love is Needed by All

Love is an essential ingredient to all healthy relationships and healthy solutions.??Our boys need and deserve every resource, every opportunity that we can offer them to create more healthy environments from home to school to work then family.??As we continue to elevate our girls, daughters and women, we must also give attention to the preservation of boys.??There are a lot of factors that contribute to the success and the disengagement of boys becoming healthy men, husbands and fathers.??It is easy to see that boys in America face a range of challenges that can have profound impacts on their health, well-being, and life expectancy. From gun violence, suicide, to absent fathers to disparities in healthcare access, these challenges can contribute to a cycle of violence, trauma, and negative outcomes that disproportionately affect boys in certain demographic groups.??When we contemplate these disparities we have a better view of what we can do individually and collectively.???

One of the most pressing issues facing boys in America is suicide. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, suicide is the second leading cause of death among individuals aged 10-34 in the United States, and men die by suicide more often than women. In 2020, 21,564 men died by suicide, compared to 6,305 women. There are several other factors that may contribute to the higher suicide rate among boys and men. These include societal pressures to conform to certain ideals of masculinity, such as being tough and self-reliant, as well as a lack of access to mental health resources and support. Boys and men may also be less likely to seek help for mental health concerns due to stigma or a fear of being seen as weak. Again, each of us can make an impact starting with the boys and men we know. We can help them know their importance and value.??We can speak kind words to them. We can tell them how we believe in them.??It may seem small but respect and value have a huge impact on males.

Another pressing fact adversely affecting boys and men is gun violence.??According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), gun violence is a leading cause of death among boys in America. In 2020, there were over 6,000 firearm deaths among boys and young men aged 15-24, and the rate of firearm deaths for black boys was nearly ten times higher than for white boys. Addressing the root causes of gun violence, including poverty, lack of access to mental health services, and a culture of violence, is critical to reducing the toll of gun violence on boys in America. In fact, gun violence and murder are also significant challenges facing boys with devastating consequences. According to the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, over 100 Americans are killed with guns every day, and boys and men are disproportionately affected. In 2020, 19,379 people died by gun homicide, with men making up many of the victims. While its true that the number of murders in the black community since 1970 is a complex and multifaceted issue, it is not impossible to stop or to intervene.??According to data from the FBI's Uniform Crime Reporting program, there were 44,758 Black homicide victims between 1976 and 2005. However, it is important to note that this figure does not include deaths related to police brutality or other forms of state violence.??Again, where there is fear, lack of love, respect and value, violence can disproportionately grow.??

In addition, the absence of fathers and positive male role models can have a profound impact on the lives of boys, particularly in the Black community. Research has shown that boys who grow up without fathers or positive male role models are more likely to experience a range of negative outcomes, including poor academic performance, substance abuse, and involvement in the criminal justice system. Imagine what it would look like to see more boys smile, thrive, create, innovate, and engage in safe, healthy and intentionally challenging activities with positive men to model, what their lives an outcome could be. To address this issue, it is important to promote positive male role models and encourage male involvement in the lives of young boys.??

Dr. Warren Farrell, a prominent advocate for boys and men's issues, has spoken extensively about the challenges facing boys in America. He has highlighted the importance of addressing issues such as absent fathers, mental health, and education, stating that "boys are not ‘defective’ girls. They are, instead, different from girls in some ways that have significant implications for their socialization." He has called for a greater focus on the unique needs of boys and a shift away from a "one-size-fits-all" approach to education and support.??Encouraging father involvement through programs such as EMIY Leaders, Good Fathers Only, parenting classes and father-child activities can help to promote positive outcomes for boys. Supporting male mentorship programs can help to connect boys with caring adults who can help them navigate the challenges of growing up. Promoting healthy behaviors through education, outreach, and support programs can help to improve the overall health and well-being of boys.

In conclusion, boys in America face a range of challenges that require a comprehensive and collaborative approach to address. By promoting fatherhood at birth, positive male role models, encouraging father involvement, addressing underlying issues, promoting access to healthcare, supporting healthy behaviors, and promoting equity and inclusion, pouring in more love, respect and value; we can work to improve the overall health, well-being, and life expectancy of all boys in America.

Calvin T. Mann is President of two local nonprofits and the author of the book “15 Things You Didn’t Know About Fatherhood” and 4 other books, host of EMIYTV podcast and speaks to audiences’ on the value of boys, men, husbands, and fathers and EMIY’s Smash Suicide campaign. You?can reach him at?[email protected] ?for mentoring, speaking engagements and panels.

by Calvin T. Mann