“Bounce Back” The Ultimate Cliché for Overcoming Stress

As we attempt to thrive in this VUCA environment, we become chameleons, continuously reconfiguring who we are and trying to adapt to the daily pressures that we find ourselves in.

Whilst we can’t predict the future, we can take control of how we view our challenges and manage our reactions to them, in order to limit the impact of stress on our psychological and physical health. If you have read my previous articles, you will know that I have an aversion to the term “bounce back” simply because when managing adversity, rarely do we “bounce”, rather, it’s a process of recovery and learning how to thrive.

Here are my 3 Steps to control stress and recover from setbacks more effectively, so as to thrive in this VUCA world. 

Step 1: Understand Stress – What It Is; How Do We React to It? 

Stress defined: “A feeling of emotional or physical tension; our body's reaction to a challenge or demand”Wikipedia

3 Important Facts:

Big stress, or little stress…your brain doesn’t care.

• The “stress response” is instinctive.
• Regardless of the significance, it affects the body in predictable ways.

Risk or Reward?

o  Our brain constantly scans our environment to determine what is novel and possibly threatening, and therefore “stressful,” and what’s not. In defensive mode, it launches a fight-flight-freeze response to that perceived stressor, causing us to react irrationally.

o  Intended to be beneficial in enabling rapid reaction in the short term, if this chemical chain is repeatedly triggered, it exhausts the body and pushes it chemically out of balance; we become less smart; less flexible

o  Small stressors can sometimes cause the most harm. They sneak up on us every day for years, until they’ve compounded into a swarm of health issues. 

Feelings? Be on your guard!

o  We use “Stress” as a catch-all phrase to describe a general sense of feeling overwhelmed, rather than get specific about what emotion is behind it.

o  We can convince ourselves that what feels good, is the same as what really is good.  Regularly self-justifying those emotions and behaviours, can fool our brain as to what is the emotionally intelligent way of reacting in that situation.

o  Whilst feelings are important, our emotions are a gauge, not a guide. We are not our Feelings.

Step 2:  Develop Greater Self-Awareness 

How well do you know yourself? Recognise your capacity to perceive, process and regulate emotional information. 

1. Look internally.  Identify your strengths and focus on them.  We succeed from a place of strength, not weakness.
2. Analyse what pushes your buttons. What activates your negative responses? Note that your biggest strengths can be your biggest weakness, when they are neglected, overused or frustrated. Pinpoint your triggers. Notice patterns and make new choices.  Identify an alternative, easy win behaviour.  
3. What stories are you telling yourself?  Our reaction to anything, is based on the subjective perception we have about that specific thing.  This allows us to label it accordingly: threat or safe, bad or good? As part of our survival instinct, we are quick to make judgements. We can distort facts and make errors in logic, especially when triggered.  Rewind the story. What was upsetting you in that story scenario?  Is your interpretation fair? Is there a different way to see it? What other choices are there? Challenge the negative stories and reframe how you view that scenario,from a different perspective. Control meaning, not emotion.
4. Be mindful of your thinking traps. Certain patterns of thoughts tend to trap us in anxiety. Whatever thinking traps you tend to fall into, the first important step is to recognise which you identify with; then learn to challenge and reframe.  Is this thought helpful? Is it accurate?  Most events call for a more “moderate” explanation.  Manage your internal thoughts so you stay focused on the future and what you can do next.

Step 3:  Creating Internal And External Balance.  5 Tips To Build Resilience 

Forget big changes and concentrate on developing tiny habits. Retraining the brain to succeed at small adjustments at a time will result in the most effective outcome. B J Fogg -Tiny Habits

1. Leverage your Strengths.  You are likely to feel far more energised and perform better, than when trying to improve weaknesses. 
2. Know your WHY. In agreement with Simon Sinek we all know what we do and most of us can describe how but are you clear on why you do it and why it matters?Our WHY is the purpose that drives us and is the key to keeping us on track with our goals, even when the going gets tough.
3. Use Affect Labelling. If you can name the negative emotion you are experiencing; describe succinctly what is causing that feeling, you reduce the hold it has on you.
4. Get some Distance. Avoid reaction by creating time, space and pause, when you are under pressure.
5. Focus on your Circle of Influence.  This is the area of your life over which you have control and can act upon. As this enables you to initiate and influence change, your stress level drops and your happiness increases.  Steven Covey

This VUCA world may be our realitybut the simple realization that we have control over our life, is the foundation of managing stress. Stress is a happiness killer.  Are you in charge?

Would you like further information on promoting well-being, whether on a personal or corporate basis?  Please feel free to get in touch with me.