Every leader is bound to take some actions that don’t work out as expected. One of the hardest skills a leader has to develop is recovering when this happens.?
Recovering from a “mistake” involves three steps:?
- Deal with the Feelings.? Recovering from a mistake is hard because we are overcome with emotions that are some of the hardest and most uncomfortable to sit with - regret, shame, disappointment.? Acknowledging the presence of these feelings is hard for most people - it’s much easier to move to frustration, blame, anger and defensiveness.? But allowing these feelings to run their course (by acknowledging and accepting them) is what allows them to pass.?
- Tell a Story that Serves You. ?Even labeling the situation as a “mistake” propagates a particular story, that what happened should not have happened, and a different choice would have yielded a better result.? In reality, the only thing we know is what actually happened, the rest is projected.? When we reframe our stories to explore the purpose behind what actually happened, we will always find one - a learning, an opportunity, a lesson, or growth.?
- Respond to the Present Moment.? The topic of recovering from mistakes was top of mind last month as so many of us watched the world’s best athletes compete in the Olympics.? It was also been the world’s best demonstration of how to be resilient.? Performance athletes don’t have the luxury to spend hours and days in the two steps above - they have just microseconds to reset. ?The key to resilience is recognizing that even in the presence of uncomfortable feelings and stories, our best work will come from responding to the present moment, and not the past.??
Resilience is born from the conviction that even uncomfortable feelings are valid and will pass, and that purpose and growth can be found in all situations.?
P.S. If you or your team would like my support building more resilience, let’s talk about my team workshops.
Awesome article