Boost your status and command respect ????????

Welcome to Quick Confidence! This weekly letter delivers a spritz of stories, tips and actions that will build your confidence and power. Each tip bolsters confidence in your body, mind, and relationships so you can lead yourself and others to greatness.

?? This month we’re focusing on confident assertiveness to celebrate the second edition of my book, Pushback, out on September 18th ! More on why it's a big deal below. ??

Have you ever found yourself downplaying your own expertise without even realizing it?

I remember attending a large meeting where one of my mentees—a highly competent and knowledgeable project manager—was presenting to a client. As he spoke, he kept prefacing his points with, "I'm just going to...", “I’m not sure if this is right but…” and "I hope that’s OK with you all..." His voice would trail off, and he would quickly apologize as if he was unsure of his own authority. Despite the excellent quality of his work, it was clear that these habits were chipping away at the impact he was making in the room.

We’ve all been there. It’s easy to slip into patterns that unintentionally diminish our status—like over-apologizing, qualifying our ideas, or minimizing our presence—especially when we want to be seen as approachable, polite, or considerate of others’ opinions. But the truth is, these habits can prevent us from being taken seriously, even when we have valuable contributions to offer. So, while behaving less assertively might feel like it makes us come across as less threatening, beware that it can also send the message that we’re unsure of ourselves or that our ideas are less valuable.

The good news? A few key changes can elevate your status, subtly but significantly, while still being true to yourself. Here are three techniques my mentee and I worked on that made all the difference—and can help you stand tall, too.

Quick Confidence Tips to Boost Your Professional Presence

1. Mindset: Embrace your expertise. Shift how you view your knowledge and contributions. Remind yourself that you have valuable insights and experiences that others can benefit from. Instead of thinking, "I hope they like my idea," think, "I’m excited to add value to this discussion." When you believe in the importance of what you bring to the table, you’re less likely to downplay it. Sharing best practices from other clients or projects can serve as helpful precedents that demonstrate your expertise.
2. Embodied: Take up space. Your body language speaks volumes. Standing or sitting up straight, keeping your shoulders back, and freely using gestures all communicate confidence. Allow yourself to be visible - conspicuous even! - and claim your bubble of space. You earned your place in the room just as much as anyone else!
3. Interpersonal: Elevate your “I” words. Words matter. Using clear, direct language without qualifiers or excessive apologies can significantly boost how others perceive you. Instead of saying “Maybe we could think about…” try saying "I recommend…", “I want to recognize…” or "I suggest we…" These small shifts in phrasing make your communication more assertive and authoritative.

Boosting your status doesn’t mean being aggressive or overbearing. It’s about stepping into your power, owning your contributions, and communicating with confidence. By embracing your expertise, projecting confident body language, and using assertive language, you can enhance your professional presence without diminishing your true self.

Remember, you deserve to be heard and seen as the capable, knowledgeable person you are. Next time you're tempted to downplay yourself, take a breath, stand tall, and let your confidence shine.

What strategies have helped you project confidence in professional settings? Share in the comments!

Pushback 2.0 and Quick Confidence in paperback!

The second edition of my book Pushback, and the paperback of my book Quick Confidence both come out on September 18th!

Unusual? Definitely. I don't know of any authors who've had a dual book release. Books need to sell a lot of copies to merit a second edition (yay, Pushback!) or paperback version (yay, Quick Confidence!), so I'm pretty honored and excited about this.

If you want to be part of the movement, place a preorder of Pushback 2.0 for yourself, mom, team, friends, daughter, niece...you get the idea. Preorders help more people learn about the book and increase its chance of getting on a bestseller list. And if you've been patiently waiting for the paperback edition of Quick Confidence, your wait is over! You can preorder the paperback version now . Thank you as always for your continued support!