Books that changed my life

As the year's end nears, I’m thinking about what books I found particularly inspiring or thought-provoking this year. When reflecting about it, I thought more generally which books have changed my life – not only this year but over the course of the last 36. Many books fascinate or entertain me – I could read Raymond Chandler novels all day – yet only very few changed how I see the world. I wanted to share some of them, and I’m looking forward to your suggestions, which else to add to the list. Here are my top 10 plus a long-list. I also added my top three from this year.

Here are my top 10:

1.    For whom the bell tolls (Hemingway) - this story about a guerrilla unit during the Spanish Civil War made me really think about death. It helped me see it less as something to fear and repress but as an undeniable part of our existence that can actually make us more courageous and leads us to life fuller lives. This made me more grateful for every present moment.

2.    Theory of Justice (Rawls) - Rawls lays out what became my own belief of how to think about justice on societal scale. He argues that material inequality is desirable but only to the point where incremental inequality still benefits the worst-off. I personally believe we are nearing this tipping point.

3.    Brave new world (Huxley) - This dystopia from 1931 left me with a powerful realization. A free society requires meaning. Without meaning, people are lost and look for other sources of structure and stability - the route to totalitarianism. You might disagree with my interpretation of the book but that's what I took away: meaning and purpose are the pre-requisite for freedom, which is a fragile good.

4.    Modern man in search of a soul (Jung) – This collection of essays gave me a more nuanced view of spirituality beyond the often-oversimplified public debate. It made me connect to a deeper morality and sense of purpose in myself that I might never be able to fully rationalize or articulate.

5.    Down & out in Paris and London (Orwell) - Like many of you, I live(d) a sheltered life, never truly exposed to people so poor they were not sure where their next meal or night's shelter would come from. This book put me in the shoes of two characters representative of how many people lived such lives in the heart of Europe until not too long ago. I found it extremely touching and it certainly deepened my empathy.

6.    Beyond good and evil (Nietzsche) - I won't claim that I understood everything of this dense prelude to Nietzsche's philosophy. However, his "God is dead" had a lasting impact. I read it not as triumphant but like a wake-up call to articulate a framework of morality based on reason and taking into account men's imperfect nature. It made me truly and critically examine my own moral standards and performance.

7.    Ordinary Men (Browning) - This powerful, historical account of a Reserve Police Unit in Poland during WWII made me wonder whether I would have been an outspoken opponent, silent bystander or active accomplice when faced with the reality of a brutalist regime that feeds from the collective unconscious. Not an easy question to answer I’m afraid.

8.    Remains of the Day (Ishiguro) - I read this elegant piece of literature as a metaphor for the need to constantly reinvent myself if circumstances change. I could have also listed the Leopard (Di Lampedusa) with its famous quote “If we want things to stay as they are, things will have to change”. At the heart of both books, in my view, lies the insight that you cannot hang on to anything. Change is the only stable thing. Or as Heraclitus put it “Everything flows and nothing stays”

9.    Clash of civilizations (Huntington) - I certainly don’t agree with everything Huntington stipulates. However, this book made me realize how strong the forces of culture and identity really are. In my view, this book foreshadowed the main fallacy of the global class - to which I surely belong - that increased diversity would be welcomed by all and everyone as long as it brought economic uplift. (Sadly), this is untrue.

10. The Life you can save (Singer) – This book challenged my self-image. I had always seen myself as a good person, but Singer challenges the reader and shows you what a truly moral person what do and act like. This book made me aspire to be a vegetarian (since I detest animal cruelty), engage in larger-scale philanthropy and made me realize that I’m not as “good” as I thought I were - and thereby made me aspire to a higher form – not that I’m always true to that unfortunately

Here the 20-longlist:

●     Tender is the Night (Fitzgerald), a powerful story of a breakdown of a marriage, which provided me with a deeper sense of the fragility of romance and love

●     The Corrections (Frantzen), a harsh critic of modern superficiality, which made me reflect about what I would be proud of at the end of my life and how strong my moral code actually is

●     Leopard (di Lampedusa), a chronicle of an old aristocratic family’s decline, which made me understand that one should never get stuck in life by being too attached to anything material or immaterial

●     A Fable (Faulkner), a metaphor about war and peace, which made me realize that the condition of the world is always a mirror of the state of human consciousness and unconsciousness. The only way to change the state of the world is to change how its people think and feel

●     The Sheltering Sky (Bowles), a beautifully crafted story of a couple’s travel through Africa, which made me realize that there is a difference between a traveler and a tourist and appreciate the value of cultural immersion

●     Disgrace (Coetzee), a famous political portrait of post-apartheid South Africa, which made me think about the question of collective guilt and atonement

●     Infinite Jest (Wallace), a monumental dystopian novel, which made me realize how much I resented every element of post-modernism, from political correctness to moral relativity to corporatism

●     The Human Stain (Roth), an elegantly written exploration of identity in the modern age, which made me steadfast in my belief that the only thing that matters is whether can look yourself in the mirror and that you shouldn’t care too much about other people’s perceptions – neither the positive nor the negative

●     Wind-Up-Bird Chronicle (Murakami), a fantastical masterpiece, which made me go through live more appreciative and seek the beauty in the little things

●     In Light of India (Paz), an abundant stream of consciousness of the many-colored impressions of India through the eyes of a foreigner, which made me weep through the beauty of its prose and opened my eyes for the necessity of duality

●     Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (Thompson), a dark humored portray of two men’s drug hazed journey through Las Vegas, which provided me with a sense of the 1960’s counterculture – the good and the bad

●     Grapes of Wrath (Steinbeck), a quintessential portray of the great depression, which made me think about all the lucky circumstances that enable me to life a life of comfort

●     Steppenwolf (Hesse), a story of a man seemingly unfit for the world he finds himself in, which helped me realize that life really is a struggle between one’s higher and lower nature

●     Waiting for Godot (Beckett), a play in the tradition of Camus, which made it abundantly clear to me that life - absurd as it is - shouldn’t be taken so seriously

●     To the Ends of the World (Golding), a trilogy of adventurous sea travel in imperial England, which made me think about the role of status in society but also in my own life and motivations

●     Orphan Master’s Son (Johnson), a fictional yet extremely well researched account of life in North Korea, which helped me understand the true value of liberty and strengthened my liberalism

●     Animal Farm (Orwell), a allegorical masterpiece, which made me reflect where I myself had been victim to group think and group identity

●     Empire Falls (Russo), a hilariously funny yet plentifully sad story of a declining small town in the rural US, which humbled me and made me thankful for all the opportunities that I enjoyed

●     On Beauty (Smith), a well written novel about a mixed-race family, which made me long for a world post prejudice and question my own biases

●     The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock (Eliot), a sentimental look back at a life full of missed opportunities, which made me realize to always live in the present and never to delay

And now to this year’s 3 favorites:

1.    The Testaments (Atwood), this sequel to ‘Handmaid’s Tale’ masterfully explores themes of authoritarianism, individual liberty, friendship, power, sexuality and so much more. Deeply though-provoking in its ability to confront us with the dark side of humanity, which likely has a home in each and every one of us

2.    Lost Children Archive (Luiselli), a powerful depiction of the struggle of migration and flight in front of the backdrop of a world which has become numb to this daily human drama at the borders of its comfortable enclaves. Made me think critically how much suffering so close to where I work and live I block out on a daily basis

3.    Black Leopard, Red Wolf (James), a masterpiece of the author of ‘The History of Seven Killings’ that is both the depiction of a hero’s quest and an exploration of everything that is wonderful and tragic about the African continent