Book Review - I Can’t Make This Up by Kevin Hart

I once saw a fantastic interview on Joe Rogan’s podcast with Kevin Hart as the guest. His drive, ambition and fascinating insight into the world was absolutely intriguing. I urge you to give the interviews a watch. Throughout the book, Kevin’s persistence and sheer hustle stand out as key attributes towards his incredibly successful career.?

Kevin’s birth was a mistake. I love the way he controls the narrative throughout his life to view events in a positive manner, his thought on this:

“Life is a story: It’s full of chapters. And the beauty of life is that not only do you get to choose how you interpret each chapter, but your interpretation writes the next chapter… You can’t control the events… but you can control your interpretation… choose a story that serves your life best.”

Life throws loads of scenarios at us each day, you could give 100x people the same scenarios and they would all interpret them in a different manner. For example, some see the seasonal change in weather from Summer to Winter as a terrible occurrence as they long for a warmer climate whilst others relish the chance to wrap up warm and enjoy the crisp morning air.

At an early age, Kevin’s parents split up. He would learn an extremely valuable skill, something he calls a ‘shoulder shrug’. In other words, an ability to simply put any negativity behind you, chalk it up as experience and move on. For me, how you handle when life doesn’t go the way you intended, is a fundamental cornerstone on the pathway to success. There is always going to be frustration, stress, anger, resentment, struggle and strife. The key is how you utilise this energy in a manner that serves your best interests, catapulting you forwards rather than pulling you back.

During his teenage years, Kevin talks of his mother being extremely strict. His school and recreational life were filled with military precision as she feared allowing him any spare time would provide an opportunity for him to participate in gang/street culture. This parenting approach instilled a phenomenal work ethic in Kevin that he is well known for. Kevin makes a point of saying:

“The things that I hated most as a child, served me well the most as an adult.”

Kevin didn’t take high school seriously and had no plan to go to college, as such upon graduation he had no direction. He handed his CV (resume) around and landed a job at a shoe store, he credits his time at the store as being paramount to moulding him. This was the first time that he learned that the power of personality coupled with knowledge (of the shoes he was selling) could warrant success. As eluded to, Kevin hated learning at school, yet loved it in his first role. I believe that the issue with modern schooling is the focus on pure rote learning to pass an exam to allow you to take another exam etc. In other words, you quickly associate learning as a chore, with little value after you’ve taken the exam. Is this really the way we want future generations to perceive education? Juxtapose that, with learning on your own terms, when you’re passionate about something (giving you purpose to your studies) your comprehension and retention is vastly superior.

Whilst working in a shoe store might not be everyone’s idea of a great job, Kevin loved it and thrived. He talks about having lots of energy and getting a buzz from his work. I firmly believe that everybody should be in an occupation where they feel this way (at least most of the time), work should be a marriage of your passions, skills and opportunity. If you don’t feel this way about your career, I implore you to find your lane. The thing that gets you out of bed in the morning, where you enter a focus level with time fading away - you should get to 5 pm on a Friday thinking ‘wow where did the time go, I wish I had more hours in the day’ vs clock watching from Monday at 10:30. Early jobs are of crucial importance in the development of young people (I actually believe they can be more important than traditional schooling), it is often the first dealings that an individual will have outside the comfort bubble of their friends and family setting. Learning everything from time-keeping, discipline, how to interact with others and the value of money. To those ends, I think that we should enforce at least one year in the hospitality/retail (the customer-facing nature is most conducive to learning) sectors as part of the curriculum to help set up each teenager better for their futures.?

The more time Kevin spent at the shoe store, the more his colleagues became aware of his sense of humour. They eventually convinced him to give stand-up a go at a local comedy club’s amateur night. Kevin’s friends however took a very different view, thinking it was a terrible idea and a recipe for onstage humiliation. Kevin had to have the courage to step out of his comfort zone and roll with his colleagues’ observations plus ignore the doubters. Kevin’s takeaway from this is as follows:

“Your friends may love you, but the problem is that they love you as you are… There’s no need to seek external approval when you already have internal approval.”

Added to the above thought, your nearest and dearest are also only used to seeing you in the context of their son/daughter/brother/sister, therefore they may not always be able to objectively see you in any other light. Their advice on whether you should do something or not is also only based on their limited insights/perspective upon limitless possibilities, thus be very careful as to whose advice you listen to and take. How many times have we all been discouraged to do something based on other people’s opinions? Instead, turn the doubt into added fuel to the fire for you to succeed.?

Kevin loved stand-up. He became obsessed, learning more about the craft. He would attend other comedians’ shows in an attempt to obtain knowledge. Every time he met a fellow comedian, he would ask to open for them, if that fell on deaf ears, he would attend their shows and continually ask until they agreed. In your own way, what can you do to put yourself in a position to learn from the best in a given field? What’s the harm in asking for what you want? A simple ‘no’ realistically. How can you keep persisting when you’re constantly told ‘no’? There is in my view, a point at which you should change your approach or goals in this instance, however only you can know how to play this particular art form on the grand canvas of your life.

As is the case in many of the memoirs I’ve read about hugely successful people, they more often than not move geographical locations to environments where more opportunities exist. In Kevin’s case, the comedy scene was very much alive and well in New York (Ask yourself, where is the Mecca for your passion?). He would travel from Philadelphia clocking up over 1,000 hours of commuting (sometimes over 30 hours per week for only 5 minutes of stage time) over the years, often he wasn’t even performing and when he was, he often wasn’t paid. This meant he was in the right circles, further enhancing his comedic skill whilst learning more about the business. The dedication and perseverance to his dream is highly commendable and inspiring. At some point, your faith and trust in the process will be tested, don’t give up on your dreams in the face of adversity. Particularly in today’s society, where life is instant from Amazon Prime, to Spotify to Netflix, we crave and expect instant success. The reality is that it takes time and requires patience.?

“Shortcuts may get you there quicker, but all the experience you gain on the long road allows you to stay there once you arrive.”

Keith Robinson became a mentor to Kevin and one particular conversation stands out to me in the book. When Kevin is starting to really make waves in the comedy business, he is invited to perform for and subsequently rejected by Lucien Hold (he helped break Eddie Murphy, Jerry Seinfeld and Chris Rock to name but a few) who said “I don’t think stand-up comedy is for you”. Throughout history, there are plenty of examples of famous rejections from James Dyson’s vacuum cleaner, J.K Rowling's Harry Potter books, Michael Jordan not making his high school basketball team and Walt Disney being fired for not being creative enough (the list is endless). The point is, this again is just one person’s opinion, don’t allow it to shape your life and knock you off course. Keith’s advice on this rejection is superb:

“You have people who understand what you’re doing right away, and you got people who won’t get it until everyone else does. That’s just the way it is. To succeed, you have to see how good you’re capable of becoming before anybody else sees it.”

To get to the next level in his career, Kevin was told by Keith to be more authentic and tell real-life stories rather than imaginary scenarios. Kevin was absolutely against this, after all, he had come this far using his imagination. There are three important takeaways here: 1) what got you to point ‘a’ may not necessarily get you to point ‘b’ and beyond 2) sometimes you should test out someone’s feedback which provides a fresh perspective, it could well change your life (as with the case with Kevin) 3) being yourself is the sure-fire way to forge stronger relationships and really excel in your endeavours.

Kevin was approached by Barry Katz who was Dave Chappelle’s manager. He turned down his advances as his gut told him that this wasn’t the best relationship for him to be in. Kevin did a similar thing when later turned down $1m (which was an enormous amount for him at the time) for a series of shows that in his opinion would destroy the personal brand he had carefully and meticulously nurtured. The same trait is true with both Will Smith and Matthew McConaughey, there is a trend with these hyper-successful types towards following your gut instinct ahead of the large proverbial carrot that is money. I think it is paramount to not just follow carrots, rather the cookie crumb trail of your wildest dreams.

Kevin’s next big breaks came in a film called Paper Soldiers and performing at Just For Laugh’s comedy festival in Montreal, Canada. This catapulted his notoriety, allowing for more Hollywood meetings and a few more roles in films such as Scary Movie 3. However, work soon dried up and Kevin went back to what he does best, stand-up. In an attempt to increase audience numbers at his shows, Kevin asked successful comedian Dane Cook how he went about this (major tip here, simply ask those that inspire you for help, you’d be amazed how willing people are to assist). Dave explained that he collected email addresses and used Myspace to connect with his fanbase. In later years, Kevin would be one of the first and most effective comedians to understand and utilise Facebook, Twitter et al.

Kevin’s idol was Eddie Murphy, he was working alongside him in a movie called Meet Dave, when he went up to Eddie and asked for his number. He later called Eddie to ask for some advice ahead of his first hour-long comedy special called I’m a Grown Little Man. Eddie’s words are so pertinent, in a world where we are all looking for a copy and paste manual of life:

“My advice is don’t ask for advice. Trust yourself and your own way of doing things. Just because something worked for someone else doesn’t mean it’s gonna work for you.”

Kevin’s hit the big time when he formed his own company HartBeat Productions to release another comedy special in theatres, Laugh at My Pain reaching the top 10 in the box office. Shortly afterwards, a movie called Think Like a Man which he starred in would overachieve in cinemas, heralding a renaissance of Hollywood’s interest in Kevin Hart. The fascinating story is that the film was not introduced to Kevin via the normal channels (which proved unsuccessful up until this point), instead, it was a stranger (Will Packer) who approached him at the airport. You never know whom you might meet and where. This works both ways, you should always be willing to present the best version of yourself to anyone and everyone whilst also being approachable when the shoe is on the other foot. Kevin would stick with Will, even when he had the pick of anyone in Hollywood to represent him. I love this, remaining loyal to those that believed in you in the early days, in an often very fickle world.

I leave you with two of my favourite quotes from the entire book:

“Waiting for other people to make your dreams come true is like waiting for a bus on a corner where there’s no stop. Sometimes the bus driver may feel bad for you and stop anyway, but usually, he’ll speed right past and leave you standing there like an idiot.”

“Life has a process of rejecting you to test you and prepare you to win…If you’re strong enough to handle rejection… without losing your passion or drive… you’ll be strong enough to reap the rewards.”