Be Bold Enough to Ask: The Key to Fulfilling Your Goals

When someone you know tells you they’ve had a big sale, promotion, or other amazing opportunity, do you ever wonder if you’ll be next? Do you think, “If only people knew what I have to offer the world, I could be just as successful?”

Maybe the issue here is thinking to yourself. Other people don’t automatically know what’s on your mind. They don’t wake up thinking about how to surprise you with exactly the kind of support you need. They won’t, that is, unless you ask for it.

Psychologists call this the “illusion of transparency.” We know what we’re thinking, but others only get hints unless we express ourselves clearly. Coaches help people overcome this bias all the time through confidence-building and communication exercises. You might be nervous inside, but no one in the audience knows this. With practice, it’s possible to project confidence even when you’re not feeling it.

It’s not enough to wait for people to notice you’re doing a good job and support you. I’ve repeatedly seen that I must be clear about what I have to offer and, at the same time, ask for help. By acknowledging our strengths while asking for support, we create a sense of mutual help.?

Let me give you an example.

I admire a businessman and start-up investor named Kevin O’Leary, better known as Mr. Wonderful. You might know him as a panelist on the television program Shark Tank, where he has provided seed capital for worthy start-up pitches since 2009.

As it turns out, one of my colleagues is his good friend. He told me Mr. O’Leary would be visiting our campus. Immediately, I wanted Mr. O’Leary to be a guest on my podcast, Training Camp for Leaders, but would I be asking too much of my colleague to invite his famous friend to join me? Should I have asked for something smaller?

It would have been easy to get starstruck and talk myself out of asking for what I needed. Instead, I took a risk, and my colleague helped me get Mr. O’Leary the show for a great interview. (Listen here.)

Because of my ask, my listeners and readers will benefit from Mr. O’Leary’s leadership tips. It takes me back to capability, culture, communication, connection, and confidence, the Five Cs of Leadership outlined in my book, The Treasure You Seek.

Through my podcast, I had the capability to give Mr. O’Leary a chance to connect with my audience. I know how to communicate based on my long experience as an entrepreneur and teacher. What I needed here was connection and confidence. A prominent podcast guest was within my reach. I just needed to seize the moment and take action.

Please let me know what you thought of my conversation with Kevin O’Leary. I hope the conversation will inspire you to be bold enough to ask the next time a similar opportunity comes your way.

Archie