“Body Language - 5 Everyday Secrets To Help Increase Your Success” - Negotiation Tip of the Week
Greg Williams, CSP
The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert at The Master Negotiator
“To increase success, observe body language. Body language displays the evidence that leads to facts.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert ?(Click to Tweet)
People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.
They had a whole list of questions. And they were unsure of the answers based on the body language gestures that accompanied the answers. Thus, they were confused about what to do next. Success felt like it was slipping from their grasp.
Have you wondered why someone displayed a particular body language gesture at a specific time? Or, have you questioned yourself about your effect on someone? People express their inner thoughts through their body language. But most observers miss the signals that could increase their success.
The following information contains five body language secrets that will enhance your success. Being aware of them will give you greater insight into someone’s thoughts. And by observing them, you will have more significant opportunities to connect with others.
1. Facial Expressions
You may have heard someone state that a person had a sour look on their face. Or that they could tell someone was happy based on someone’s smile.
When people speak in person or on the phone, they add additional meaning to their spoken words based on their facial expressions. And even if you cannot see their face, you can sense when someone is smiling or frowning – the additional insight is delivered based on their demeanor.
So, when communicating with others, note the facial expressions they display. Observe to what degree their facial expressions align with what they are saying. And if there is a misalignment, follow the path of the gesture. It will expose someone’s true thoughts. ?
2. Nonverbal Cues - Listening With Eyes – Seeing With Ears
What you hear and see is another factor that leads to success when interacting with others. As I alluded to when talking about facial expressions, you can gain more insight into a person’s mindset by listening to what they say and how they speak. But I am referring to what you hear with your eyes and what you see with your ears. Let me explain.
Note when someone changes their cadence, tonal pitch, and their demeanor. Those are points of consideration to ponder. By using your ears to see what you may have missed and your eyes for what you are hearing, you will become more in tune with more aspects of the communications you are involved in, leading to increased success.
3. Invading Space (Observe temperament for greater insight)
When someone becomes aggressive or wishes to be more deliberative, they may lean in. If the gesture is slight, you can assume that person is emphasizing their point. But if they prolong the action or draw closer, note the demeanor difference before and after the display. And if you carefully listen when speaking on the phone, you can hear someone’s altered temperament. That will be the signal that a mental change has occurred in them.
4. Hand Gesture/Placement
Hand placement and gestures can deliver great insight into a person's inner thoughts. The following are a few body language signs to observe to increase your success with others.
A.) Hands On Hips
Research has shown that when people place their hands on their hips, they feel empowered and experience more confidence. And those observing that action perceive that person as being more confident. Accordingly, I have two suggestions.
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First, use it with others when the situation is warranted. Second, when someone displays that gesture in your presence, question if they are trying to impress you because they feel inferior to you? Either way, you will have gleaned insight about that individual, which you can use to enhance your persona and increase the success you have with them. ??
B.) Placing Hands On Tables/People
When someone places their hands on another person or object, such as a table or chair, they indicate that they feel safe doing so. That is an excellent tell, meaning someone feels comfortable in that space.
If their gesture suits you, continue discussing the topic at hand. If their interaction is not pleasant, ask them not to lean on the table or chair and stop touching you. Doing so will allow you to control the flow of the communication and their demeanor. ?
C.) Palms Up/Down
Palms displayed up or down are strong signals disclosing how someone feels at that moment. In general, palms up display openness, but there are other gestures to consider when making that assessment. For example, note how close their elbows are to their body – the shrugging of one or both shoulders, etc. Those gestures convey a sense of guardedness. Note the added information to what someone says when they emit either gesture. And if you are unsure of what you see versus what you are hearing, ask them for clarification.
5. Intuition
Okay – this will surprise a lot of people. When observing body language, intuition can be a great ally. Why? Because sometimes you will have a feeling about something. In most cases, what you experience is stimulated by a sensation from something you heard or saw. It registered on a subconscious level but not at your level of consciousness. Suffice it to say, observe your feelings. They are your sixth sense summoning you. ?
Reflection
To increase your success with others, you must become better at reading body language. One way to accomplish that is by observing and implementing the five everyday body language suggestions in this post. That will allow you to increase your accomplishments along with enhancing your persona. It will also allow you to anticipate actions better, expose the unexpected, and always have success fitting readily in your grasp. And everything will be right with the world.
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Remember, you’re always negotiating!?
After reading this article, what are you thinking? I'd like to know. Reach me at [email protected]
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Member Marshall Goldsmith 100 Coaches. Marshall Goldsmith Certified Leadership, Executive & Team Coach. Global Leadership Coach. Helping Leaders Become The Leaders They Would Follow. Visionary Leadership Coach.
2 年Greg Williams, CSP, you are such an inspiration!
Helping Sales Professionals and Sales Leaders Reclaim Their Confidence and Their Energy!
2 年Outstanding insights Greg!! So much for me to learn, practice and do!
CEO, Leadership & Executive Coach at BigBlueGumball. TEDx speaker. Author of “VisuaLeadership.” MG 100 Coaches.
2 年Great stuff, Greg Williams, CSP !
Helping others learn to lead with greater purpose and grace via my speaking, coaching, and the brand-new Baldoni ChatBot. (And now a 4x LinkedIn Top Voice)
2 年Wow! This is cool Greg Williams, CSP love it!