Is body dysmorphia stopping you from living life to the fullest?

The level of body dysmorphia with women is at pandemic levels. The daily complaint about their bodies, the god given vessel that they were born with is rife. 

The degree of self-analysis, self-critique, self-abuse is extreme with women.

The most dangerous aspect of the negative cycle of self-judgement is that our thoughts create our reality. There is a large disconnect between what we ‘want’ and what we ‘do’ to achieve it. What we often want is to have a successful career, loving and fulfilling relationships, a thriving health and more, but the thoughts which we are running in our mind about ourselves are often negative without even realising.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”

– Epicurus

Comparison, lack of self-appreciation and lack of self-acknowledgment seem to be a norm. There are women who are incapable of accepting a compliment due to shame and embarrassment they experience daily. There are women who are paralysed by their own insecurities incapable of living a life of full expression physically, emotionally, financially, sexually, spiritually. Instead of embodiment of desires we have entrapment in bodies we do not love and that’s heart breaking.

"I used to be fit, and now I can't even recognise myself"

"Nothing seems to work for me anymore"

“I cannot fit into any of my clothes”

“I have never been able to lose the weight”

“The hormone imbalance and menopause ARGGGGGHHHH”

“I have never been able to lose the baby fat”

“There is ‘fat gene’ running in my family”

“It feels like I am always on a diet”

“I would never let my husband to see me naked like this”

“Who would want to be with me when I look like this”?

“I am ashamed of my body”

“I hate my body”

These are just some of the words which women use to describe their bodies. Unfortunately, an underlying context here is that women often allow their perception of their appearance to determine their value. The worth is judged by preconceived subjective inner voice, which often isn’t truthful to the world, it is only truthful to the person who feels “not good enough”. Since our perception is our reality, that’s the reality many women live in. How is this an issue? Just stay with me for a moment and imagine what is happening in the mind of a little girl, or a little boy hearing their mom, their aunty, their sister speaking words of “not good enough” about themselves. Is this going to ignite a positive or negative internal dialogue for them? You know it, certainty negative. Why? Because all beliefs are learned!

Remember: “You are not your thoughts” Ekhart Tolle

You are also not your body! Your body is something which you have. You have your body so you can experience your life to the fullest – that’s your birth right!

In preparation for writing this article with the intention of highlighting the importance of the quality of the relationship we have with our bodies, I came across significant data which I am eager to share with you today.

"Women are culturally raised to not talk about 'women's problems', including periods, pain and sex," says Elizabeth Farrell, gynaecologist and medical director at Jean Hailes for Women's Health.

One study posted on www.now.org reports that at age thirteen, 53% of American girls are “unhappy with their bodies.” This grows to 78% by the time girls reach seventeen.

According to 2016-2017 report by AIHW, 60% of women in Australia are overweight, and 30% of women are obese (BMI over 30.0).

Having worked in fitness and wellness industry with professional women, most of them in leadership, for over a decade I know that the key to creating the results and sustaining them is experiencing a breakthrough with the relationship you have with your own body. In order to do so, we must first acknowledge the following factors:

1)   Your language (especially self-talk) determines your reality.

2)   Don’t love yourself when you get the results, love yourself first, to create the results.

3)   Quit creating new habits in a disempowered state of not being excited about this habit – otherwise you have self-sabotage! The benefit of a new habit must outweigh the benefit of an old one ie. If you want to lose weight but you drink half a bottle of wine every night, choose which habit you love more, knowing you choose the consequences of it too. Which habit would the future healthy, vital, vibrant, energetic version of you choose?

Remember that your internal dialogue affects not only your emotional and mental state, it does affect your physical health. That’s right! The words you think of yourself, whether positive or negative, adequately affect your inner organ function with that your hormonal environment, your digestion, your energy levels, and all systems which keep you functioning every single day. In other words your body shape, your general wellbeing and the sense of ‘how you feel’ are all determined by the level of self-love and self-kindness you have.

Can you imagine being in your body where you only ever loved it, acknowledged it, felt grateful for it and celebrated its power? The next time you go to your wardrobe you are proud of what you see in front of the mirror. You feel excited trying new clothes on because you feel good in your own skin. You love the look on your partner’s face when they see you standing in your power, confidently, being in your element. You love spending time with your friends and family doing the things you love doing, simply having fun. Your career is thriving because you show up every day embodying empowered leadership. 

If you are ready to honour your body and be proud of it being one of your biggest assets then let’s talk – over and above coaching feminine leaders one of my areas of speciality happens to be ‘fitness and wellbeing’ having worked in that industry for over 1 decade!

You deserve to love yourself today!

Are you ready to champion your next level of trajectory personally and professionally to lead and live the Ultimate Life?

We are excited to announce the launch of the Feminine Leaders 90 Day Online Group Coaching Program commencing on Thursday the 22nd of April 2021 at 7am AEDT.

We are looking for 10 powerfully committed women who are ready to break through the perception of the glass ceiling, reclaim their moxie and feminine leadership qualities to achieve stratospheric outcomes!

The group is purposely immersive in nature with focused accountability for sustained momentum for the full 12 week period.

This Feminine Leaders 90 Day Group Coaching Program is not for the faint hearted but is designed for those who are TRULY COMMITTED to experiencing RESULTS to unprecedented levels.

If you are interested or know of anyone in your network that would be interested then I would love to hear from you!

Email [email protected] or DM directly.

Much Love and Respect,

Ela Staniak Leaupepe

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