?? This blockchain just WOKE UP

?? This blockchain just WOKE UP

Namaskara, this is the doodhwala. The crypto newsletter that feels like being in a Spielberg movie. ??

We’ve got action like Indiana Jones. Heartwarming drama like E.T. And more importantly, super fun comedies like Jurassic Park and Jaws.?

Wait, Jaws is a comedy…right?

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Here’s what we got for ya today:

  • Bitcoin whales are filing their bags
  • Keeping Up with the Fraudashians
  • Star Wars: Fantom Of The Menace
  • Milky Meme Of The Day

LFG!

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Bitcoin whale are filing their bags ??

From sharks to whales. Specifically Bitcoin whales.

What are Bitcoin Inc. whales doing?

Well apart from doing crazy backflips and causing massive waves (that’s how waves are caused, right?)

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???Whales are adding to their Bitcoin bags! ??

That’s right with Bitcoin’s price as boring as that one time when you watched golf on TV, whales are buying up Bitcoin.

Bitcoin addresses that hold:

  • 0.01-1 BTC
  • 1 - 10 BTC
  • 10- 100 BTC

Have all increase their holdings.

The spikes in this chart ???are almost as high as the number of flights outta Qatar right now.

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Why are whales buying Bitcoin?

3 reasons.

1???No price action

Bitcoin’s price right now FLAT AF, basically is the opposite of any road in India.

Bitcoin’s realized volatility is down to its lowest level since October 2020.

With no price action, whales would rather accumulate than trade.

Can ya blame them? ?? ♂?

2???Exchanges run

Since July over 500k BTC ($8.4 billion!) has moved off exchanges.

In the last 7 days alone, 65k BTC worth $1.1 billion left one exchange — Binance .

Where’s this Bitcoin heading? → Straight to cold storage. ??

3???Not open for interest

Because of the ???2 reasons, Bitcoin derivatives trading is taking a hit.

Derivatives trading is measured by = open interest (the value of contracts open and trading in the market)

And it’s pitted against the market cap.

If open interest > market cap = more derivatives trading

If open interest < market cap = less derivatives trading

And what’s it now?

The average open interest to market cap is down by 75% in 2 months.

??

And this is why whales are adding to their BTC bags while everyone takes a breather this holiday season. ??


Buidlers: Want support? ??

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?? An Angel Di Maria to Messi’s Miracle.

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???A Scottie Pippen to Michael Jordan’s Last Dance.

We know just the partner for you!

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Brinc x Animoca Brands

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They’re bringing their ZK Advancer Accelerator to ???? .

If you're a web3 startup in India or a web3 startup entering India, apply to their accelerator program.?

Apply?here.

Registrations close on 30 December.

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Keeping Up with the Fraudashians

Man…feels like the whole FTX saga started YEARS ago!

So many interesting developments have happened since then and it’s been SO HARD to keep up!

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That’s definitely what she said.???

But don't worry! The doodhwala is here to bring you up to date. (I mean, that’s literally our job)

Today we’ll give you a quick “wtf is going on!” update on the continuing FTX saga.

SBF is flyin’ high

High in the air…on his flight to his home country, U…S…A!

Yuppity yup yup! ?

SBF was arrested in the Bahamas a few weeks back and was also denied bail.

Now, he is being extradited to the U.S. so he can appear in court to face all the charges.

Our man didn't even fight the extradition process. ?

Cuz if he did, he knows it would have taken a LONG time and he would have had to stay in the notorious prisons of Fox Hill in the Bahamas, until it was over.

Witches be snitches

Caroline Ellison, the moon of SBF’s life, his sun and his stars, the Simran to his Raj, decided to snitch on her him. ??

Woah! Really?

Caroline Ellison, ex-CEO of Alameda Research, and Gary Wang, the co-founder of FTX agreed to a plea deal with the U.S. Justice Department. ??

They pleaded guilty and hence would have their charges waived off, except criminal tax violations ofc.?Can’t escape the tax man, not even if you nail down a billion-dollar criminal!??? ♂?

All of this is in exchange for FULL cooperation with the U.S. Attorney.

This means she might be a witness in SBF’s trial and she will have to cooperate.

Damn. That’s a sad love story. ??

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But there’s ONE CATCH to this plea deal.

Caroline has to be a U.S. Citizen or she will be immediately deported to her home country.

Well, you must be wondering “Ofc she is a U.S. Citizen. She was born there.”

You are right about here being born there but you might be wrong about the citizen part.

Wtf is going on?

As you might already know, (especially if you’re in ????) not a lot of countries are crypto-friendly.

But in order to set up your crypto entity, most people go to crypto-friendly nations like:

?????Singapore aka?the destination of every desi’s first international holiday

?????UAE?aka the country where Dubai is in!

?????Taiwan?aka China *loading*

…and set up residence. ??

So if Caroline followed a similar path and renounced her U.S Citizenship for let’s say the Bahamas, then this whole deal falls through. ??

I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

If you were the judge what punishment would you give FTX’s main man SBF? ??

REPLY and let us know.


???Help The doodhwala???

We started this newsletter as a fun thing! ??

It went well.

  • you laughed
  • you told us our humor is ??
  • you even sent us a bottle of spoiled milk

But most importantly crypto is kinda fun for you now.

Our goal has always been to give you the ???milkiest ?? content ever.

And it ain’t just news. And it certainly ain’t just newsletters.

??

It’s a whole buncha things!

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We’ve got a few ideas. Some good, many?many?very terrible.

So, we wanna know what you think.

Be a cool doodh and take this survey pls.

????????

Help The Doodhwala


Chaach and Charts: Fantom of the L1 Opera

When we say L1, what pops into your head?

Well, one thing that doesn’t pop into your head is… Fantom . ??

What’s a Fantom?

Fantom is a Layer 1 blockchain that’s super scalable and super fast.

It’s kind of a new chain that was released in 2018.

Like most projects during the 2021 bull run, Fantom gained A TON of traction and users.

And just like every other project, the traction has been dead since the beginning of the year….

…until now.

Fantom now seems to be back from the dead.

Both in terms of users and especially, with the number of smart contract creations.

Around?23m contracts have been created on Fantom so far.

But the majority of those were created just in the past couple of months!

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Tweet ?? This

Milky Meme of the Day

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If you want more doodh then, be sure to follow our Twitter (@DoodhwalaDaily)

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