In the Bleak Midwinter - Part 2 of 2

5 principles to deal with self-doubt.

This article provides the final 3 of 5 principles for keeping your head when you are going through a wobble – or crisis - of self-doubt.

Principle 3: Trust your process – and tweak it

How many of us loved running Time Trials and Cross-Country at school or college?

How many have carried that forward into our current routines, whether that’s casual running or training for marathons, half- marathons or 10ks?

I used to enjoy Time Trials: road-running a 2.5 miles circuit and a 10-mile circuit. (I’m getting back into it in a small way during lockdown, but very slowly!)

I remember that, common to both the 2.5 and 10-mile route, there was a long road, through a posh area. You could make this phase of the run quite pleasant by noticing the large houses and the lovely cars in some of the driveways (think 1970s Aston Martins and Ferraris).  

The only trouble was that the pavement we ran on was made up of those little red paving stones about a foot long and 4 inches wide. They certainly looked nice but were very, very uneven in most places!

This was not such a problem when you were walking – the occasional stumble almost added a certain charm to your progress – but it was quite a threat to your wellbeing when you were running against the clock. There were quite a few falls and injuries!

I still remember the sensation of running ‘up and down’ with the undulation of the pavement. It was strange and meant you had to make a more conscious effort to run that stretch.

My point?

As a runner you had to choose between running more ‘consciously’: thinking about how you were running, to avoid mishap or injury. Or you found a new type of routine to deal with that different type of surface, so that you could run more on ‘autopilot’ mode.

I found ‘conscious’ running tiring and draining (and still do). However, finding a new pattern – which for me involved repeating a short mantra while focussing on a large white house at the end of the road – removed my need for conscious effort.

I only had to focus on my basic breathing and moving my limbs in a certain rhythm: I could let my mind go blank, which as all runners know, is deeply relaxing.

In the same way, we can establish new elements of rhythm and process quite quickly when we encounter the unusual surface of self-doubt, and the buffering and disruption that causes to our usual rate and style of progress.

We should remember to trust our well-proven processes and switch to a stoic sort of ‘auto pilot’ because we know that delivers high-impact results – and then tweak them for the ‘surface’ we need to run on. 

I guess it’s like running the unglamorous back straight on an athletics track: that stretch lacks the optimism and energy of the first 100m and the promise and ‘all-guns-blazing’ of the 200m mark and home straight respectively.

The unglamorous back straight is the bridge between optimistic, energetic starts and the reward of accelerating to a finish-line. By trusting our ‘autopilot mode’ we conserve ourselves for that final push to our goal!   

(Image: Hobi industri, Unsplash)

Principle 4: Seek out – and deliver - high impact that suits you, even if it doesn’t pay well

Rather than wavering in the face of self-doubt, it is often better to seek out and engage with a high-impact opportunity to raise or refresh your level of achievement.

Do you know what a ‘gamechanger’ achievement will be for you? Do you know where that win/win situation lies for you and the people who need your help? How can you gain access to make that offer and generate the result that meets their need and yours?

If you are finding it tricky to decide your strategic direction, I have found the Keirsey Temperament Sorter to be a help over the years. I was introduced to this during my time at Henley. It’s not just another psychometric. Rather it uses your expressed preferences to recommend the sort of career roles or callings that might suit you. I complete this profile annually (you get some free information and can pay a small amount for a personal report) and I get consistent results and suggestions for work roles.

The most valuable aspect for me was the suggestions of careers and roles I had never even heard of before! By the way, I have no vested interest in promoting Keirsey, I’ve just found it of practical use to me and have recommended it to many friends, who have found the same.

Aiming for, and delivering, high impact results will counteract self-doubt and drive forward your level of belief in your ability to fulfil your mission and purpose.

Principle 5: Build the power of the team

Daniel Priestley of Dent Global observes that ‘environment dictates performance’. In other words, those we mix with will raise or lower our bar of expectation and performance over time. Therefore, where will you go to become a member of aspiring and high-performing teams?

How do you do that? One way I’ve used is to volunteer for high-risk/high-impact assignments that others prefer to avoid.

When you deliver it builds your confidence assuming, of course, that you build and deploy suitable technical and interpersonal skills to enable this.

The other key factor is to build and fuel ambitious and high-performance teams. This sounds kind of posh but in my experience, such a team is made up of motivated round pegs in round holes, aligned to a common purpose and with compatible values such as mutual trust and respect.

How do you build the teams you’re in? I like Mary Parker Follett’s conclusion:

The most essential work of the leader is to create more leaders – Mary Parker Follett

Given this principle, what reciprocal ‘fuelling’ relationships have you established in your team? That is, do you have a trusted friend who can challenge, rebuke, inspire and counsel you and who can hold you to account for your attitude and delivery? How effective are you in doing the same for them? How much do you care about their success?

SUMMARY

Everyone who has made, or is making, high-impact in their sphere experiences times of self-doubt. This may be at a critical pressured time or is more likely to come in waves or episodes.

Important ways to handle moments or seasons of self-doubt include:

1. Expect – and accept – episodes of self-doubt

2. Remind yourself of your track record of specific achievements – or they may blur and recede

3. Trust your process – and tweak it

4. Seek out – and deliver - high-impact

5. Build the power of the team

(Image: Katya Austin, Unsplash)

David Santineer is a Co-Founder at Proactive by Design. Having led change teams in private, public and third sectors, he specialises in foresight for high stakes decisions and self-starting skills for better results from change.