Blame is weak - the path ahead, needs your strength

Inspired by Grant Smith post on blame cykles I felt and urge to share. Thank you Sarah E Rosenberg for being the connector to Grants writing. And thank you to Javon Swaby for providing your amazing photo on Pexels .

Here is the result:

The human experience is often a tapestry woven with various emotional threads, some vibrant with positivity and hope, others darkened by insecurity, failure, and blame. It's a cycle that many of us find ourselves trapped in, sometimes without even realizing it. This toxic cycle, can be a relentless whirlpool, drawing us deeper into its pit of negative emotions.

But within this cycle, there is a glimmer of hope—a beacon that shines through the darkness. It is the recognition of our shared humanity, the understanding that we are not alone in our struggles. And that there is always a path forward. When we see our fellow humans in a positive light, we acknowledge the potential for goodness and growth that resides within each of us. This perspective is not na?ve; rather, it is a courageous act of faith in the face of adversity.

In a recent conversation, I argued that seeing the positive intention of people I encounter as the secret sauce to success. And my friend and I had an argumentative discourse about this. I held my point but was moved by the insight my friend had into being in toxic environments and surviving. We all have experiences of work relationships that are toxic.

Maybe because of my positive attitude or maybe because others wrongfully perceive me as a threat. I have my threads in my experience with relationships, that are suboptimal, less then positive and some even toxic. I don’t always have the option to move away and sometimes holding your ground is the right thing to do. I don’t want to be a slave to affect and negative emotion. I don’t want to quit in a rageful rant. I want to do better. I work consciously to direct my energy to move beyond the situation and reorganize the format of our interaction to be more constructive. It does not always make the interaction pleasant, and it takes courage and strength. But it gives me a way to progress intentionally and feeling of incremental success. In small steps every day climbing up the sides of the pit of toxicity. This compounds over time to exceed my expectations. I get a chance to grow.

Looking forward is an act of resilience and the audacity of hope. It is the conscious decision to use evaluation not as a tool for exposing failure but to foster future action. Blame, with its nasty grip, only serves to anchor us to the past. We can learn from our failure. But I believe that is not in the falling, but when we get up and find our footing again, is where we can learn and grow. So, when you stumble, look up and find your new stride. It will take you onward. As the musician Jelly Roll beaconed so passionately, "The windshield is bigger than the rearview mirror for a reason." Our focus should be on the path ahead, vast and full of possibilities, rather than the road behind us, littered with the debris of what could have been.

Sharing our stories and insights is a powerful way to connect with others who may be navigating their own toxicity cycles. It is a reminder that we are not journeying alone and that our reflections can serve as guideposts for those who are seeking a way out of the darkness. So, let us continue to share, to reflect, and to move forward, together.

Thank you for engaging in this reflective discourse. May your journey be filled with growth, understanding and please do share ??