A bird that flew away ??

Last week millions of data points were erased. Millions of feelings shared between couples disappeared, at least from our database. It was the last day of the Couplenss app.

Let’s start my newsletter series Candid Beginnings with an ending. I want to give you the backstory of what’s to come.?

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For over three years, I lived and breathed Coupleness, an app for couples to share feelings and well-being. With thousands and thousands of downloads, a handful of features like “Apps we love” by the App Store, and tons of media coverage, we were pioneers amongst relationship apps.?

The best part? Testimonials from couples reaching out saying: “You saved our relationship", or “Now, I understand what he feels.”

When to kill your startup?

Knowing when to kill your startup is a separate newsletter. Still, it came down to needing product market fit/long-term retention in our app that could justify a sustainable business and a lack of developers to iterate fast to find that product market fit.?

Jere Vento (co-founder of Five Letter Foods) told me: “Knowing when to quit is an important skill as having the grit to push forward.”

Letting go of your startup

How do you let go of something so close to you that it is you? My strategies:

1. More than. I am not Coupleness. I am a mother, partner, and friend. My startup is just a part of me and for many founders for a specific time in their lives ??
2. The right people. I talked to other founders and investors. Not friends. Talking to other founders and investors gives you perspectives few others can provide. Thinking aloud helps, also bouncing and twisting.
3. Therapy. I’ve been going to therapy since I was 30, which supports me mentally ?? Folding with Coupleness, I have not felt like a failure; I did my best. I am not ashamed Coupleness did not turn out how I wanted it to be and I know investors take a huge risk investing in early-stage startups.
4. Working out. The past three months from February, when we decided to fold, until April exercise have been super helpful. My yoga classes, lunch walks and floorball evenings, when you can’t think of anything else ??
5. It's not the end. Entrepreneurship is getting back on the horse again ?? Knowing I can give it another try. Necessarily not with the same team/value prop and investors. But I can make it happen again.??

An HBS study found that while first-time founders have a 21% chance of succeeding with their company, Second Time Founders who succeeded with their first company have a 30% chance of succeeding in their next company. Second Time Founders who failed in their first company have a 22% chance of succeeding with their second.

I've now increased my chances by 1%, but my learnings from Coupleness feels way more than that ??

A bird that flew away

The best for the last but not for everyone. What made me let go fully of Coupleness was a breathwork/reiki/energy healing session with Elin because the sorrow was in my body, not in my head.?

When I came to Elin’s studio, I lay down, breathed, and cried for an hour. Elin guided me through this, and my eyes were closed. Did I say I had so many creative thoughts and visions?

The most beautiful was that Coupleness came to me as an image of a bird. Then it turned its head and flew away. Honestly, this made me let go entirely.?

Time for Candid beginnings

So here I am, ready to embrace a new journey. Many fun opportunities have come my way in the past month like three CEO and three co-founder requests from exciting companies, but I will do something else.?

I’m prepared to be candid, and I hope you’d like to follow me here.

The next chapter will entail the following:?

1. Consultancy work. I help impact-driven individuals and companies cut through the noise and reach their target audience. Contact me to learn how I can help you succeed.?
2. I’ll also do a board training with deb. ?It will be fun to be back in school ??????
3. And last but not least... I will embark on a new startup journey with my co-founder from Coupleness, Peter Viksten . More about that in my next newsletter ??

Ps. Feel free to reach out if you’re struggling with your startup. I had several founders contacting me over the past months. I've been listening and we've been bouncing and twisting together ??