The Art of Small Talk

Growing up in India and living abroad for the last 24 years, I have learned several new things, one of which is participating in small talk across different cultures. While living in Japan for five years, I found myself in customer-facing roles with limited knowledge of local interests such as Sumo wrestling! However, my customers were kind and curious about someone from India, which kept the conversation going. Similarly, when I moved to the US, conversations revolved around topics like American Football, Baseball, Golf, or Rock Music, in which I had limited knowledge. Therefore, having engaging small talks across cultures was a skill I had to develop over the course of years.

Small talk is a significant aspect of building professional relationships and understanding colleagues as individuals. Over the years, I have learned to engage in small talk effectively and build strong networks. I cannot overstate its importance in how much it has helped me enjoy office settings, with my colleagues and customers.

The nature of small talk varies widely across cultures, as social customs and practices change. For example, what works in India, may not work in the US. And what works in the US may not work in Europe and so on. Yet, there are some universal things that can be applied everywhere.

Here are some key points to consider when engaging in small talk:

1. Avoid being transactional: Transactional interactions result in closed-ended conversations and prevent getting to know the person or understanding the big picture.

2. Don't get too personal: Avoid discussing personal details that others may not be interested in, such as your spouse's breakfast preferences or your child's college applications.

To engage in effective small talk, consider the following topics:

Basic demographics: For example, asking about someone's commute can lead to interesting conversations in the New York area. These are foundational topics that help you develop a better understanding of the person, leading to better next steps.

What do you do outside the office?: Asking about someone's interests or hobbies outside of work can lead to engaging conversations and help you understand their passions. This question always works, and I have experienced people opening their phones and showing pictures of their interests and hobbies. They have even followed up by sending links and information.

Any vacation plans for winter?: Questions about past or upcoming vacations can pique interest and reveal personal preferences.

Weekend plans: Discussing weekend activities can provide insights into a person's lifestyle and interests.

Streaming preferences: Talking about favorite shows or movies can lead to engaging conversations about personal tastes.

Stock market and economy: Discussing financial topics can provide insights into a person's investment interests and the economic outlook from their perspectives.

Books: Sharing favorite books or authors can lead to meaningful conversations about personal values and interests. A

Business or Technology Domain: As long as you have shared interests in a particular technology or domain, this is a great opportunity to learn new perspectives.

By following these guidelines and engaging in small talk, you can build strong networks, understand your colleagues better, and present yourself as a unique individual beyond your role.

So, small talk is actually a big deal! You may actually enjoy it.

Disclaimer : Thank you for reading this blog. The views expressed here are my own.