The Big Idea of "Headship"
What is up with this idea of headship? It has long been used to "keep women down." But we've missed the mark here. I don't believe for a man to "stand up" a woman has to "sit down." So how do we both stand to reach our potential?
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. - Ephesians 5:23
Paul gives men clear instruction later in verses 25-33 to bring clarity to what this means. If we are going to marry one of God's daughters, we must be willing to follow Jesus' lead in how to serve our wives. How does Jesus "practice" headship and what does it look like? Go read these convicting verses! He gives up his own life by accepting the relational responsibility to cultivate the purpose and calling of the church. And it culminates in his own death on the cross. Husbands serve their wives by helping their wives reach their full potential...no matter the cost to themselves. Jesus served with blood, sweat, and tears to see the path cleared for the church to stand up.
Husbands, do you hold your wife back...or do you encourage her to embrace ALL that God has called her to be and to do? God will hold you responsible for how you treat your wife. If you do not treat her like Jesus already has...you are failing to live out the Biblical mandate for your marriage. Ask God to forgive you and immediately begin to encourage and serve your wife in this manner. It is that simple.
This will look different for every marriage. I suggest by asking what your wife feels called to be and to do. She may say, "I want to be a stay at home mom." She may say, "I want to go back to school." She may say, "I want to run for mayor!" Who knows, but asking the question is the first step to being able to serve your wife in this way. As your wife stands up, this doesn't mean you have to sit down! God will help you navigate the unique response your marriage will take as you embark on this journey...together. And together you will represent the image of God in your marriage.
What about women who do not have husbands? This week i had a conversation with a highly intelligent woman who had some honest questions about headship as she is not currently married.
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. - 1 Corinthians 11:3
Well...the good news is that Jesus is still committed to providing headship for unmarried women even as he provides headship for every man...and the ENTIRE church. Imagine...the King of the universe is committed to seeing every man and every woman reach their potential. Get plugged into a local church, not because you need to be "under the authority of a man," but because that local congregation is under the authority of Christ, where we all belong. In that divine order there is safety, clarity, and authority.
Together we stand. Together we reach our potential. Together we reveal Christ.