BIG Dreams and Little Kids

5 ways I chased my ambition in the thick of early parenthood

I’ve talked to a lot of young parents who have huge dreams, but are lucky to be getting a full night’s sleep. I get it because I’ve only recently emerged from the throes of early parenthood. As someone with a full life (big job, managing my own book and brand, raising 11 and 13 year old girls and supporting a partner who has a demanding profession), I invite them to give themselves some grace, while also trying out the 5 steps I’ve taken to chase BIG DREAMS while raising LITTLE KIDS.?

Here goes:

1) Hire a coach – In order to get really clear on where you want to go on the most efficient path, hire someone to help you get clear. This is what I did in 2015. Not only did it lead to the idea for Small Town Leadership and Let Her Out, but it sped my path to making it happen. If you are the type of person who appreciates tough questions and likes to be held accountable for progress, a coach can be your ticket to success. Coaching changed my life. It could be the best investment you make in yourself at this point in your life, too.?

2) Find and use your “Fringe Hours” – I learned about the concept of fringe hours on a podcast from author Jessica N. Turner way back in 2015. It’s where the Pomodoro Technique (focusing solely on one thing for 25 minutes) meets those small pockets of time when your kids are a) in bed b) watching a 22 minute cartoon c) participating in their weekly dance/soccer/karate class or any other activity that doesn’t require your full attention. This is your time to get things done. I’ve built, rebuilt, written, recorded, and created more content in these fringe hours than any other blocks of time. The fringe hours can be your time to make progress on you!?

3) Write it down – if you have an idea, strike while the iron is hot and write it down! I have a clear memory of a motivational speaker who came to my high school telling us that the reason 98% of people don’t achieve their dreams is because they don’t write them down. He then went on to encourage us to become part of the 2%. I believe this more than ever. In addition to post-its galore on my desk, I keep a running Google doc titled “Unpublished Content.” When an idea hits, I write it down. If I have 10 minutes when the flash hits, I write as much as I can in the moment. (That’s how this article came to be.)?

In addition to capturing these in-the-moment thoughts, I also write down my accomplishments and goals on a monthly basis. I look back at the content I created and delivered, the coaching clients I served, the connections I nurtured, and the progress I made toward my larger goals. Then, I craft a set of goals for the upcoming month. This usually takes me 15 minutes, and sets the course for a productive month ahead.

4) Lean on your partner – I couldn’t have done half of the things I’ve done in the past ten years without the support of my husband, Rob. I've had seasons in my life where I've had to travel a lot for work and commit to activities in the evenings and on weekends. I used to have extreme guilt at leaving my family to chase these dreams, but now I realize that I’m a role model for my daughters. They are learning from me what it takes to be a leader and build a business. I’m also showing other parents that it’s OK to put your partner in charge while you go after your dreams.?

5) Identify the right time to get started – You will always be able to come up with a dozen reasons why now is not the right time to pursue your dreams. What if I challenge you on this and simply state that: Now is the perfect time for you to pursue your dreams. Waiting for your kids to be out of diapers will turn into waiting for your kids to start kindergarten which will turn into waiting for your kids to graduate from high school. By then, your dream may be lost. You might lose yourself in the process. The next 10, 12, or 18 years are going to pass by quickly, whether or not you are pursuing your dreams. Why not jump in and make it happen, NOW? Your kids, partner, friends and family deserve to see you showing up for yourself as much as you show up for them.?

If you already have your big idea, this should be a good blueprint to get you started. If you don’t know where to even start with your big dream, hire a coach or use some of your fringe hours to explore. Enlist the support of your partner to help you get started.?

Don’t let having little kids get in the way of your big dreams. You are showing them a way forward that will stick with them for a lifetime.

Thank you for reading this newsletter. If you joined in order to follow along with?52 Weeks of Meaningful Connections,?feel free to visit the website or catch up through LinkedIn. I hope you will enjoy continued content on meaningful connections and living authentically. I draw on my experiences as a coach, author and speaker, as well as the roles I play in the world of wife, daughter, mother, sister and friend. If you enjoyed the initial 52 weeks or my bestselling book?Let Her Out: Reclaim Who You Have Always Been, you'll continue to experience content like that here.