#BEYOUROWN MEETS KAITLIN HOWITT

We meet Australian based creative entrepreneur Kaitlin Howett and founder of Bloom, an online program and community for young women that support their rite of passage from girl to woman. Alongside this, Kaitlin is also the co-founder with her boyfriend of Living In Love, a powerful project dedicated to igniting people’s passion for conscious relationships in the modern world, and guiding people through ways they can level up their partnerships. We explore the concept behind the launch of living In Love and also Kaitlin’s views on why alignment and soul purpose are incredibly important in order to strengthen our unique journey through life.

Hey Katlin, can you introduce yourself to us?

You can call me Kat, I’m a 22-year-old Australian living in the South West of West Australia. My love languages are physical touch and quality time, so basically if we can have high vibing chats and a cuddle then we can be friends. I live here with my gorgeous fiance and we are really, really passionate about teaching people how to really thrive. Thrive physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially, in love, and basically most areas of life.

I am the eldest of seven children, most of whom still live on the Cocos Keeling islands – where I grew up. They are a huge reason as to why I do what I do. Every single one of them is honestly so inspiring heart-centered, entrepreneurial and connected. I paint, draw, write and love to be creative. I end up being the big spoon every night.

I grew up wild, and rebellious, always challenging the rulebook society had gifted me. Which now channels into having a calling deep within me to show up in a way that evokes alternative ways of thinking and being for people. Humans absolutely fascinate me. Why we do what we do, believe what we believe and why we create the lives we live.

So We’ve both actually committed our work-life to educate people on how they can upgrade their lives consciously, and move through beliefs & emotional blocks that may hold them to an identity they no longer want to play in and to do it in a way that really nourishes the divine feminine within us all.

My favourite ways to enjoy my time, is to self-study, to spend time with really like-minded people who both challenge and uplift each other and hold each other accountable as our truest self, I love cacao ceremonies and connecting to myself, my love, and spirit regularly. I love self-exploration and meeting myself each day.

Can you take us through your journey to where you are now?

My parents are both primary school teachers, and they’ve always put so much heart into what they do, in order to teach in the most expansive way within the equation system. So growing up I developed a natural love for educating. I am the eldest of seven kids, so alongside the love for educating came a deep responsibility to make sure all of my siblings had the tools they needed to thrive too.

I began attending self-development workshops at the age of nine. At ten I became obsessed with manifestation and conscious creation, which then became second nature to me as I grew older. My first business was started at eleven with a friend where we would paint and sell our art at markets, and at fourteen I asked my dad to give me a job picking in the orchards, $3 a tub, so that I could save up $500 in $2 coins and attend a Theta healing workshop so that I could delve into my own lineage and clear my energy body.

At fifteen I traveled to Bali on my own to attend a weeklong camp for young kids, to really initiate them into adulthood. Delving deep into life skills, team building, and self-exploration. At sixteen I deeply understood that our generation was filled with so much magic. We didn’t want to do things the same way as generations before us.

Our truth, passion, alignment and soul purpose is simply so important to us. So a huge part of my journey is that at seventeen, I began network marketing and partnered with a beautiful health and wellness company that had so much integrity. I was able to educate young people how to create residual income for themselves and get paid to then go out and explore their soul work. It lit me up like nothing else, and lead to me traveling around Australia in a motorhome I bought, and get paid every single week on the road just for helping people find their freedom.

Following that, at eighteen, I went through a breakup and moved to Bali. It was in Bali where I felt my divine feminine essence fully for the first time. I realised how hard I had been Hustling, and how nourishing flow actually felt. How sensitive I was, and how beautiful my heart was. I had been so busy making it happen in a man’s world that I had forgotten to celebrate the magic moving through my veins as a woman.

So that leads to an entirely new chapter for me, and I began studying Tantra and the healing arts. I dived deep into self-work, on an energetic, physical and spiritual level. That’s when I began dating Tully, and we both became very passionate very quickly about a conscious relationship and the power that has in the world and for the children of the next generation.

We quickly birthed Living in Love – Where we run couples retreats, online course, and workshops. I also launched BLOOM which is an online initiation for young women into their conscious womanhood, a transition I am very familiar with.

Now, we are really just exploring what it’s like to be in a relationship with business/entities, and how to nourish the energetic relationship between us, and our ideas, and then how to best birth them into the world in a way that honours their essence.

I am so committed to showing my generation that there is another way, and it can be so simple. It can be easy, and it can light you up from the inside out. That connection to self is so nourishing, and relationships can be both connected and freeing simultaneously. That your ideas want you to live the life of your dreams, and our only job is to feel good and receive, over and over again.

What is a day in the life of you like?

Every day is a little different, as now I work and play around my mensural cycle. Imagine splitting your cycle up into 4 phases. Winter, Spring, Summer & Autumn. Winter is when you are bleeding, and need rest. I take things so much slower, I sleep longer, Netflix and I become buddies, and I am very self-reflective, letting go of anything no longer aligned with who I am.

Spring & Summer are the following two weeks, and my energy picks up again. I feel inspired so this is where I’ll likely be the most social, run events, do any speaking gigs, and really pour my energy into the business, self, relationship, and lifestyle. Then we move into Autumn and this is when I begin to slow down again, and really honour my ability to see any problems and navigate them (our brains actually connect differently during this week of the month).

So right now, during my Summer phase, It looks like waking up early, and my None before nine rule. (No social media before 9am). I honour that this is my time. So I’ll shower, have a smoothie for breakfast, and usually meditate or have some ceremonial cacao, journal, or write creatively.

Then until 12 is my creative time. It’s when I feel most alive. So I’ll write any social media posts, or plan any upcoming events etc. I’ll break for lunch – which my man often cooks me (We are both working from home full time which has both its challenges and triumphs)

Then the afternoon is a lot slower, often heading down to the beach, or into town to catch up with a friend, and I attend to any emails and life admin stuff. We do our best to switch off from social media as the sun goes down, but we sometimes have courses that are online and run into the evening. So after that Tully and I reconnect and go over our day together and wind down for the night.

We aim to have a day a week off our phones completely to really drop into presence again, and we ceremony/have rituals regularly that allow us to connect to each other, our hearts, our beingness and vision often throughout the week.

What was the concept behind launching Living in love – Your couples retreats & Programs?

Most people don’t have a framework or role model of a healthy relationship in today’s modern world. We are navigating social media and so many distractions. We felt so pulled to show this generation how sacred relationships can truly be and what’s actually available for us here. We’ve moved from role mate relationships where everything was really clear, where men mostly provided and women mostly created the home, into soulmate relationships where we are all so committed to honouring our path and becoming the most aligned, inspired versions of ourselves. We (as a collective) went from co-dependency to independent. Both of those don’t fully nurture what a relationship can provide. We are passionate about educating people on the dance. The dance between masculine and feminine, the dance between being sovereign, free, yet with an open heart and deeply connected to another.

To honouring relationship and all the magic. We want to show people how good it can really be, to overcome self-sabotage, to upgrade life over and over again, to consciously create a relationship of their dreams with intention, how to keep it real and bring it back to love.

Living in Love was born one night where Tul and I were talking about all the things we have learned (and embodied) over the years. I had been passionate (low key obsessive) about relationships through self-study since I was 16.

That night it was hot on my heart and I felt a fire in my belly to really show people the potential of a relationship and why it’s so important. I wanted to create a framework for the new way of relating, in today’s world. I wanted to not only teach people but offer them actual ways to integrate what they learn into everyday life – not just keep it as a nice idea.

Having a thriving relationship not only flows into every area of life, but it also gifts our children/future children a framework for a healthy relationship. They are developing their blueprint of what a relationship should look like straight from us, so in order to give them the tools to thrive, we need to show them. Children feel everything that goes on, even if it’s not spoken about – so it’s crucial to show them how good it can be so that they don’t have to grow up having to heal all the gaps like we all do.

We decided to run our first retreat – which was a huge success and such a magical weekend for us and all the couples who came. The retreats had so much interest internationally that we had to bring it online too. Now, we educate & guide couples through public speaking, online courses, one-day workshops, couples retreats & semi-private retreats. We have heaps of free content over on our Instagram along with all our updates on events etc.

How is Living in Love funded, is it bootstrapped,self-funded ect?

Right now, Living in Love is entirely self-funded. She’s still young herself, only just over a year old. We would love to call in an aligned investor one day so that we can expand, and channel (living in love’s) truest expression into the world.

It would be magic to have a School of love, where we have many teachers and experiences available for couples to really nourish their relationship in a fun way.

Can you tell us more about your brand DNA and ethos at Living in Love?

We are so aware of the disconnection of life in today’s world. We run from deep intimacy, are scared to be fully seen, and most of us don’t believe we could be fully loved. We fear that relationship restricts freedom – or that we need to be in a relationship to be worthy. Collectively we don’t understand how healing relationships and love can be when done in a healthy way.

This results in two people – who don’t fully know, understand or love themselves, and who have two completely different blueprints on what relationship should be like – coming together – and then wondering why it feels hard, and then expect the other person to somehow heal them. We avoid responsibility like it’s going out of fashion and most of us simply have no framework on how to navigate a healthy conscious relationship, or how to balance a relationship with the rest of our lives – we definitely weren’t taught in school.

This then gets passed down directly to our children, who grow up to have the exact same roadblocks. So to really change the next generation, we need to look here *Taps heart* and to our intimate relationships. Living In Love, is an entity devoted to guiding couples into a sacred relationship, to keep it real and bringing it back to love. Providing both conscious and practical content, teachings and experiences that can be easily integrated into everyday life, with the intention to show couples how good it can really be.

She is directed towards millennials and GenX but attracts all age groups who resonate with what she offers (basically all those young at heart).

The intention for couples who attend workshops/ retreats/ or work with us online –  is to really delve deep into their relationship with self (first) and then their partner, on a conscious, mental, emotional, physical, sexual and spiritual level. To really allow their relationship to evolve and reveal itself to them, and to consciously create the experience their heart desires. To reconnect with the sacredness and vibrancy of self-honour, love, and the freedom within commitment, and to lean into intimacy.

Living in love shows couples how to navigate every phase of the relationship – even when it gets uncomfortable (due to challenges or uncomfortable because things are so good). The big vision for Living in Love is to have both a 3D physical and online school for couples. Both a retreat style space with many available classes & teachers that people can come to and nurture their relationship, heal and evolve. A place that feels fun, expansive, and where couples can connect with like-minded others.

The sort of place young people wants to hang out and learn together. I’m not sure if you’ve read Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert or Earth is Hiring by Peta Kelly, but basically Living in Love is an entity, an energy/idea channeling through us. We are simply the vessel. So we trust her guidance and check in with her regularly for the next step. Sometimes it doesn’t always make sense but it is always perfect. We look forward to witnessing the evolution, playing our part and collaborating with people who are aligned with the vision.

Can you tell us the main contributing factor as to why so many of us women self-sabotage?

Oh my, What a topic. We each have an internal average ceiling on how good life can feel for us. It’s a completely unique person to person experience and is developed as we grow up. If we experienced a lot of love, success, abundance, joy & ease growing up – then our nervous system will be used to it. It’s familiar. If we experienced a lot of disappointment, chaos, sadness, loneliness, etc – then our nervous system will be used to that. It’s familiar.

Basically, self-sabotage happens when our nervous system get’s uncomfortable. Our primitive mind associates ‘familiar’ with safe. And our minds aren’t designed to have us thrive, be rich, be deeply in love all of the time, etc.

Our minds are designed to keep us safe and have us survive. Which is all well and good – except a lot of the time – familiar isn’t always what we want. We can stay in abusive relationships because it’s familiar. We can stay broke because it’s familiar. We can stay in stagnant friendships because it’s familiar. We create chaos or drama because it’s familiar.

So what’s happening is we sabotage when a category of our life is expanding and feeling better than it has before. Example – We might start earning more money than we ever have before, and our nervous system isn’t used to feeling that way. So we may go and pick a fight in our relationship to bring us back to our overall average of “how good can it get”, or we spend all the money as soon as it arrives so that we can go back to feeling financially stressed.

Something I noticed for me is that I grew up in a chaotic household. A lot of love but it was chaotic with so many children. I began drinking coffee at 18, and after a cup, I would feel great for an hour or two, and then about four hours later I would feel low key anxious. I didn’t realise that this was my way of inviting chaos and stress into my life as a subtle sabotage.

We sabotage in so many different ways for so many different reasons. We fear to outshine the ones we love, so we sabotage to keep ourselves small. We fear the responsibility that comes with success so we make sure we never get too successful.

We fear being abandoned by our community, so we sabotage to stay relatable. We fear that somehow we are fundamentally flawed or don’t deserve the love, or the money, or the wellbeing, or the success, so we sabotage.

So awareness is key. Awareness of the emotions that we are addicted to feeling, and the main actions we take that sabotages what we are trying to manifest and create into our lives. It takes practice, and we simply have to choose differently every time.

We love your YouTube Channel, can you highlight 3 tips to help us clear past beliefs & old money stories that will enable us to move forward?

 

1. Get really clear with the stories you are currently telling yourself about money. Usually, it’s what most naturally flows out of your mouth. My old ones were“I can’t afford that,” “I don’t have enough,” “You have to work hard for the money,” or “Having money means I’m greedy and not spiritual.” These were all beliefs that I thought were true – Until I realised that the belief comes first and the evidence comes second. Not the other way around. So just reflect on your upbringing. What did you hear about money? Did you associate it with stress? Arguments? Responsibility? Freedom?
2. Now, write down a more empowering story about money. Let go of what you know. Ask yourself, If I could fully choose my experience with money, from scratch, what would I choose? Examples of mine are: “Money flows if I am living in alignment.” “Money wants to nourish and nurture my life.” “I am organised with my money and honour and respect it.” “I circulate money to businesses and people I believe in.” Incorporate this into your everyday life, correct yourself if you are experiencing money in a way that doesn’t feel good. Honour every dollar you receive and spend. Thank it for what it’s providing you with every time you pay the bills (aka a warm home, a soft bed, running clean water, feeling safe and secure, the ability to feel grounded etc) Every time you receive it, thank money for flowing through to you.
3. If you feel like you have blocks around money – your emotional body is magic, I promise. It’s worth getting sad or getting angry and having a big cry to release. Go back into your memories around money. If right now you’re feeling stressed, go and let it out in a healthy way. If you hold onto these dense emotions they create blocks and then money cannot flow through, and if it tried, you wouldn’t be able to receive it. Money is energy that is all. So are your emotions so allow them to flow. By doing this you are clearing the channel. Your vibration is the magnet. A powerful practice is writing a love letter to money (You can read more about this in the book Earth is Hiring by Peta Kelly).Apologise for the past and how you’ve spoken about money or used the money. And then recommit. Your experience with money is a reflection of your relationship with money.

 You are also the founder of The Bloom Playground, can you tell us a little bit about that and who it involves?

The Bloom Playground is a conscious home for girls evolving into their womanhood. Her intention is to soulfully educate girls aged 15-21 on self-honour, alignment, money, business, sexuality, their emotional body, purpose, and community.

Right now she is expressed through an 8-week online journey for girls worldwide- an initiation through live video chats and an online community group. With a weekly class and assignments. So far BLOOM has impacted over 200 girls and opened a conversation of conscious living.

The community is potent and beautiful and so nourishing. The girls have organised their own in-person retreats following the course and are full of so many gifts. They understand Bloom is a beautiful way of life, and it doesn’t end simply because the course did. It becomes a part of them and gifts them to tools to navigate self-love, and relationships and how to show up in their truth in the world.

The bigger vision for Bloom is to have a podcast for teenage girls who are self-aware and want to spread their glitter with the world and provide a safe space to open up and explore. That and Bloom sister circles and retreats around the country and then the world. We are about to dive into a Bloom Facilitator training that will simply train any of the girls who feel called to lead, in hosting their own community groups.

Bloom was born through my love for one of my sisters Amber. She had just turned 15 at the time and was self-aware, but couldn’t fully relate to her social circles. So I created Bloom to help her initially, and to also establish a community of young girls who understood the same things so that they could have deeper conversations and keep each other accountable.

What about the Mens workshops that you offer?

I don’t offer men’s specific workshops myself, other than couples stuff, but my partner Tully does. He is such a grounded guy who loves to teach about leadership, holistic wellbeing, self-sabotage, relationship, business and so much more. He is a former physiotherapist who realised that emotional wellbeing, physical wellbeing, spiritual and financial well-being all hold hands. Especially for men and their mental health.

He is really guiding men into a new way of being and I’m trying not to be biased but it’s powerful to watch. He has a FaceBook community group for men called “The Conscious Locker Room” where they host weekly wisdom offerings where men share their genius.

He also does online and in-person workshops for men. My favourite thing about what he does is that he attracts men who aren’t necessarily on the personal development bandwagon but can really relate to them and he brings quite complex topics and simplifies them so that men can actually take them home and practice them into everyday life. It’s so special to watch.

Where can you see yourself within the next 3-5 years?

I won’t lie, I am such a nester. I love creating a home. And I love children. That’s probably a big reason why I’m so passionate about the relationship because I know how it affects kids. I watched each of my siblings download different ways of being based on my parent’s relationship during that phase of life so I know how powerful it all is.

In 3-5 years, I hope to have my children and really be embracing our family pod. I’d love to have a home, that represents and expresses who we are, one that feels clear, expansive and inspiring. I’d also love to be traveling with Tully & the kids, still hosting workshops & talks, experiencing cultures, and coming home to our sanctuary.

By then I can see both Living in Love and Bloom as established entities somewhat self-sufficient, with a beautiful team working with us to have the impact that we envision. Of course, surrounded by a tribe of like-minded beautiful people, creating their own expressions into the word.

What strategies do you have in place when looking at the expansion of Living in Love?

I know this isn’t typical, but trust. Trust and surrender, and listen to the subtleties. To trust our intuition.

If an opportunity comes up, we tune in and listen. We trust the guidance and act accordingly. We reserve the right to change our mind and always honour the highest good. I believe this is business of the new world.

These entities/ ideas, are here to channel through us, nourish us and to be nourished in return. It’s quite a feminine flow of doing business. And so far it’s worked magically. We definitely call on perspective and help when we feel like something is out of our skill set.

Our next step is hiring an aligned team, and creating some back-end systems as I know my strengths in the marketing and vision casting and the educating itself.

And likely have an official website/online portal be created. We’ve relied on the beauty of the Instagram world and it’s been so successful so far, but definitely, time to expand, as we don’t like to do things the traditional way.

Can you tell us what areas you have struggled in professionally?

My biggest struggle has been wanting everyone to thrive.

It feels uncomfortable if the people I love are struggling (in any area of life but specifically business) yet I am thriving.

I think it’s the classic self-sabotage and not wanting to outshine. I’m sure many others reading this can relate. I notice I have definitely played down my success or how proud I am of myself, in fear of making others uncomfortable.

I am only now owning the fact that all is perfect and everyone is exactly where they are meant to be. I am not responsible for anyone. Giving myself permission to be devoted to my purpose. I used to struggle with burning out a lot. I had a habit of going hard and then feeling so rundown and struggling to re-motivate myself. I realised it was due to not honouring my cycle and my femininity. I thought I had to go go go in order to be successful. That’s the old paradigm I believe. So Now I flow with whatever true for me each day, and that’s been so valuable.

Have you ever had any other mentor? If so how has this benefitted you to grow?

Yes! I believe having teachers and mentors can be so powerful.

I’m pretty fussy with mine. I make sure that I only ever learn from someone who is truly embodying what they teach. There are enough people on this earth simply regurgitating information and not enough people actually practicing when nobody is looking. I usually have a few different ones at any time, and they change often based on what I am called to study and learn.

What would you like to see changed for millennial women in business?

To start honouring themselves. To quit the burnout and the go go go hustle. We have been taught that in order to survive in a man’s world – we must become the men. We suppress our true authentic power and magic as women. The more of us who stand up in our truth and honour our open hearts, bodies, and innate knowingness, the more of us who will be able to enjoy this journey more. Our vibration is our magic. If it doesn’t truly feel good. Stop doing it and find a new way. It can be easy. It can be enjoyable. Slow down. There is no rush. Weave our essence through our creations. Our business is our art. We are allowed to nourish ourselves first.

What is the best piece of business advice you have received to date?

That my business isn’t me, so to stop taking it so personally. I am the vessel. The channel.

My business moves through me and I have been gifted the job of grounding it into the earth. It sounds woo-woo but I’m sure most of you with businesses have experienced that moment when inspiration strikes and we just have to act. It just moves through us. Honour that energy.

What is the number 1 critical lesson you have learned in your career so far?

From the wonderful Peta Kelly. If I didn’t know how it “should” be done, how would I do it? Trust myself. We need to if we want to create a new way.

How do you create an evenly balanced work and personal life?

Listening to my body. If I’m tired, I will rest. If I’m inspired I will work. If it’s sunny I will play and I do my best to live in a  mindset of expansion, not fear. Fear says “if I don’t work, I won’t achieve the vision, I won’t be able to live, I won’t be able to support my family or life”

Expansiveness says “by honouring myself and playing when I want to play, or resting when I want to rest, I am teaching myself that I am worth being honoured. And if I am worth being honoured, I’m also worth being successful, and being loved, and feeling alive. Money flows when I am in my alignment. Not when I hustle and feel like shit. My vision evolves and reveals itself to me when I’m still enough to listen”

Also, Scheduling. Not scheduling and creating no breathing room, but scheduling my work hours, my time with my man, my social time with friends, my time to simply be. The schedule creates a masculine container for the feminine (creativity, expression, ideas, enjoyment) to breathe.

The highlight of your career so far?

I have three! One: The final week the Bloom journey, with 100 young girls, and they would all light a candle through the screen and call on another girl to light theirs. The screen slowly lit up with all these beautiful young women and their candles, seeing the physical representation of how our own light inspires others to shine.

Two: The end of the first ever Living in Love retreat. On the final day we have our friend Tim Morrison host a Cacao ceremony and deep sound healing for all the couples, and afterward we all come together as a community and share our takeaways from the weekend. It was so high vibing that nobody wanted to leave and so many of us stayed onwards and just had pizza by the fire to soak up more of the good vibes.

Three: Just recently, Tully and I did a two-hour talk to a big group of people at the Reverence retreat in WA, all based on conscious relationship. It was so much fun and I honestly adored seeing the audience be so present and receptive and ask such amazing questions.

What gives you ultimate career satisfaction?

Checking in with people 6+months later and knowing that the changes they’ve made are long-lasting. That it’s so real and is truly helping people upgrade their lives and welcome in thriving. I know it kinda sounds cliche, but honestly, it is no fun thriving on your own. It’s so rewarding when people do it with you.

What challenges have you seen to have been presented during the growth of Living in Love?

The only challenge we’ve come across is the diversity of couples. We’ve had couples on the verge of break up in the same room as couples who are so rocking solid and just want to delve deeper into love. So facilitating rooms with those dynamics can be challenging – but it worked and grew us as facilitators and provided some beautiful reflections for everyone there.

Which other leading entrepreneurs and pioneering game changers do you also admire and why?

Great question. Mackenzie Marzluff and her partner Michael. The show me the transmission of deep trust and surrender. Peta Kelly, I’ve known her since I was 16 and she really is guiding millennial into the new way of living, creating, giving and thriving.

Right now she is really showing women a new way of business – that’s softer, slower and so potent. Alexi Panos and Preston Smiles as they are simply legends and such a power couple. Melissa Abrosini and Nick Broadhurst, another power couple and I love how she has nailed her marketing.

What is a good article or book you have read recently?

One amazing book I’ve read that’s super entertaining to read, directed to millennials in business is ‘Earth Is Hiring’ by Peta Kelly.

Top 3 go-to Podcast channels?

1. ‘The Melissa Ambrosini Show.’
2. ‘Nourishing The Mother.’
3. ‘The Mojo Mecca.’

How do you measure your own terms of success?

Alignment. If I feel good in my soul then things are going great. Its so simple, my emotional guidance system is my homie.

What does #BEYOUROWN mean to you?

Be your own. To really make your own rules. Question everything you know and decide if it actually serves you towards what you’re wanting to create for yourself. Be your own guidance, cheerleader, support. Nobody else can empower you.

Be your own rule maker and rule breaker. Be your own lover and create a life that feels good for you.No-body else has to live in your body except you, so make sure you enjoy it and you aren’t living in a world of comparison.

Lastly, what is next for you?

Right now, It’s focusing on getting married haha! We chose to do an express wedding and organise it all in two and a half months, so that’s happening. Then it’s to really be clear and feel good about the year ahead. There are so many moving pieces so surrendering to waterers in store for us!

www.beyourown.org