Beyond the Gavel: Why Empathy Makes You a Better (and Nicer) Lawyer

The legal profession often equates success with courtroom victories and climbing the corporate ladder. Top lawyers earn coveted spots in the "Hall of Fame" and firms brag about their headcount and brand recognition. Yet, amidst this pursuit of legal prowess, there exists a concerning phenomenon—the prevalence of lawyers who excel in their craft but falter in their day-to-day relationships and personal conduct.

I've crossed paths with a few lawyers who embody this weird disconnect. These legal eagles, courtroom wizards though they may be, can be really mean, or even downright abusive, outside the spotlight. It's a reminder that being a good lawyer doesn't necessarily equate to being a good person.

One glaring example is the mistreatment of support staff. Some lawyers fail to recognize the value of associates, paralegals, and administrative personnel, treating them with disrespect and disdain. Whether it's berating junior lawyers, overworking paralegals or creating a toxic learning culture for young pupils, these behaviours not only harm morale but also erodes trust within the firm. When respect is absent for fellow lawyers, the treatment of "lesser" staff becomes even more abysmal. I have seen cleaners, drivers, despatch runners or office clerk be shouted at for making small mistakes.

Young lawyers and pupils are especially vulnerable. Fresh out of law school and eager to prove themselves, pupils often get thrown into the deep end.? They're expected to perform like seasoned lawyers, forgetting that pupillage is all about learning the ropes, not just filling a position.? Some pupil masters seem to miss this memo entirely! There is a reason why the Malaysian legal system mandates that only lawyers with at least seven (7) years of practice can take on pupils. This requirement exists so that these experienced lawyers are prepared to mentor, guide, and shape the next generation of law professionals.

Even sadder, some see pupils as merely cheap labour.? They pile on crazy expectations, forgetting everyone messes up when they're new (hello, weren't we taught mistakes are how we learn in school?).? Instead of letting pupils sink their teeth into real legal work or shadow their masters in court, they get bogged down by repetitive tasks day in and day out. Transcribing notes of proceedings, binding cause papers and hauling document bricks to court – sure, everyone's gotta pitch in sometimes. But if that's the daily grind, might as well just hire a paralegal assistant.

Then there are the lawyers who clearly haven't mastered the art of chill and relax. Rage outbursts and hostility become their go-to communication style – seriously, the "throwing files" norm needs to go away. It creates a work environment thicker than fog with fear.? Imagine walking on eggshells just to talk to your boss, wondering if they're “in a good mood?”. These mood swings are a major productivity buzzkill.

?

This wasn't exactly uncommon at my old workplace. I got hit with insults like "slow" and "lazy" more times than I care to remember.? They even tried to mess with my head, questioning my education with stuff like "Are you sure you're even a UM grad?" or "Did you really get an A in this subject in law school?"? Turns out, I wasn't alone. Many of my former colleagues went through the same experience. Isn't that just plain bullying? Maybe lawyers should take a page out of their own playbook and ask themselves: would I appreciate being spoken to like that?

?Deep down,?everyone's human,?even lawyers!?We all have emotions,?and a positive work environment with a little motivation goes a long way.

When I was practicing, my former employer would throw stuff like " This is not the way I taught you.” Had I possessed the courage at the time, I might have pointed out his own failings.? His relentless pursuit of legal victories appeared to have come at a significant cost. He had become a slave of the profession, neglecting the importance of fostering relationships with his colleagues and people around him.? Furthermore, his known role as a human rights advocate rang hollow in the face of his dismissive behavior.? His actions stood in stark contrast to the ideals he supposedly espoused. Really, how can one truly champion human right while those working closest to them feel entrapped and enslaved by a system of overwork and under appreciation?

?

The environment fostered in my previous workplace was particularly toxic when it came to personal well-being. Any disclosure of personal struggles or challenges was met with a dismissal of their ability to contribute effectively, essentially deeming them expendable. This harsh reality was evident in the experiences of at least three (3) of my former colleagues who sought psychiatric treatment and medication due to the relentless pressure and complete disregard for work-life balance. Once, I addressed the growing workload by explaining I was only a pupil and still learning. The response? a curt, 'Then learn faster’.

?

The pressure didn't stop at the office door. Weekends often meant work texts pinging your phone, like a never-ending game of notification whack-a-mole. But here's the thing: not everyone has a free weekend to dedicate to work. Some colleagues have families and children to look after, parents who need a helping hand, or simply need some personal time to recharge. A quick message checking in and asking if they're free for work, along with a friendly "how's it going?" or “what are you currently up to?” shows a little respect for their time. After all, family (or that well-deserved downtime) should always be a priority. It's not like we're raking in the overtime pay anyway.

?

Senior lawyers, who often own and manage their own firms, may not fully grasp the financial realities faced by their younger colleagues. Unlike associates and staff, senior partners typically have greater financial security and are less likely to experience unemployment (unless their businesses are struggling). Additionally, they often enjoy greater flexibility in terms of scheduling and taking leave. Hence, implementing flexible work arrangements, such as providing work-from-home options, performance-based bonuses, and additional allowances, can be impactful gestures that demonstrate appreciation for the hard work and dedication of younger team members. These measures not only improve work-life balance but also serve as powerful incentives for attracting and retaining top talent.

?

In short, being the “senior lawyer” is not a free pass to mistreat others.? In the grand tapestry of our legal careers, let kindness, integrity, and empathy be the threads that weave together our professional legacy.? After all, the victories we win and the cases we argue are just a part of the story.? The true measure of our success lies in how we impact the lives of those around us and the positive mark we leave on the legal landscape.? Let's strive not just to be great lawyers, but also to be exemplary human beings who inspire the next generation of legal professionals.

?

If you’re already a great lawyer, why not try to be a better person?