Beyond the "F"

From a young age, we are taught to avoid failure at all costs.

I remember working hard in school, practicing every math problem of every book, aiming for a perfect score so I could get a spot at IIT Delhi — the top engineering college in the country. Things didn’t go as planned. I scored 98 instead of 100 and I got the top architecture college instead top engineering college. Though it was a big thing, but it felt like a “F”. With gathered optimism, I told myself - Everything happens for a reason.

(Before you think about it, yes, I admit, I was a nerd.)

In our grading system, “F” stands for failure, and it’s the only grade where the letter directly matches its meaning. “F” = Failure = Fear.

Today, I received the results of a fellowship I had applied for—a program that selects only 16 climate leaders around the world. I wasn’t accepted, but I am waitlisted. It’s neither an “A” nor an “F” - something in between. I’m close, and being shortlisted among the brightest minds globally is a big deal. I am confused about my own feelings! I felt more disappointment than proud. Why?

Psychologists Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky discovered that the pain of losing is twice as strong as the pleasure of winning. This explains why we fear failure so much—that we tend to view grades like “B,” “C,” “D,” & “E” as “F”. But that can’t be the whole picture.

Life doesn’t stop at “A.” It takes us beyond, shaping us in unexpected ways. Jack Ma talks about his many rejections—like not getting a job at KFC or being turned down by Harvard ten times. If he can believe failures were crucial for his success, looking back at everything I have achieved till date, I realize “F” cannot stand for failure. Maybe it stands for “Future”.

“F” in academics, work, stock market or love—

Let no one define what could have been better,

Maybe "F" is the best grade of all,

"F" holds my uniquely coded future. & felicity.

- Akanksha