Beyond the Balance Sheet: Retirement’s Unsuspected Challenges

Transitioning to retirement can be far more challenging than anticipated. Even when you are financially set, retirement can catch you off guard. Many find themselves with feelings of darkness, loneliness and a profound sense of loss that they never expected. I saw this happen to my mother back when an illness forced her into retirement. Suddenly the one thing that had been absolutely core to her self-identity – being the owner of a dance studio – was gone. She couldn’t dance. She couldn’t teach. She couldn’t run her business. On top of all this, Mom also lost her daily routine, her main source of social interaction, and her reason for getting out of bed in the morning.?

Transitioning to retirement can be difficult.

Whether it is planned or forced upon you, you may find that retirement isn’t the life or lifestyle you expected. The reality is that retirement can be both exhilarating and daunting. Either way, it often leaves people shocked by the depth of its challenges. Some end up in crisis mode, needing more support than family and friends can give.?

Whether it is planned or forced upon you, you may find that retirement isn’t the life or lifestyle you expected. The reality is that retirement can be both exhilarating and daunting. Either way, it often leaves people shocked by the depth of its challenges. Some end up in crisis mode, needing more support than family and friends can give.

If you want the transition to retirement to go more smoothly, you cannot just take it lightly and assume you’ll “figure it out when the time comes.” Here are four things to consider…

1.? How you’ll spend your time – If you’re accustomed to the fast-paced, high-pressure world of being a business owner or executive, suddenly having nothing but unstructured free time can be overwhelming. What are you going to do all day? To avoid just sitting in front of the TV all day, think in terms of using this time to discover or rediscover things that truly bring you joy and fulfillment. Embrace your newfound freedom by setting goals, pursuing hobbies, focusing on new and existing friendships, and exploring new interests.

2.? Your identity and status – For years your work has defined your sense of self and self-worth.

Now what? What I’ve seen is that the change in self-identity can be much more difficult for business owners, because quite often their self-identity is essentially the business. Many see what they do as who they are. Who am I? I’m the owner of a boutique HR consulting firm.

?For business executives, a big challenge is often the sudden lack of status and authority. One moment you’re the Big Cheese, with a staff of people who follow your orders and treat you with deference. The next moment you’re just another old, retired person.

3. Your social connections – If you’re used to the camaraderie of the work place, even if it’s only on video conferences and the phone, losing this can be extremely isolating. Many retirees end up feeling a profound sense of loneliness or possibly even depression. In fact, this overall sense of loss – losing your social connections, identity, purpose, status, etc. – is sometimes called the “dark side of retirement.” The transition isn’t always rosy, and friends are not always empathetic or supportive regarding the challenges you’re going through.?

While it’s definitely a good idea to proactively seek out social interactions and foster meaningful connections, many retirees also benefit from working with a life coach or therapist to help them through this transition.

4.? Your purpose and personal growth – As the saying goes, if you’re not growing, you’re dying. The good news is, retirement is a new chapter, ripe with opportunities for personal growth and exploration. Who do you want to be? What do you want to retire to? What will be the purpose of this next chapter in your life? What do you want to be remembered for? Many retirees choose to volunteer, pursue creative endeavors, learn and experience new things, travel, spend time with loved ones or enjoy other activities.

While financial security is certainly important for a comfortable retirement, you need to recognize the broader aspects of this life transition. By starting to think about retirement before you actually retire, and approaching this phase of life with openness, you can make your retirement years truly fulfilling and meaningful. May you finish strong!