Between Strava and a Hard Place: The Art of Juggling Life and Leadership

Umuzi Pulse brought to you by Lyndi Lawson-Smith

I sat down this morning to write an article about the complexities of managing an organisation that has more than doubled in size in 18 months because ChapGPT said I should. It was going to be insightful, maybe even a little profound.? But it’s a Tuesday morning and Strava tells me I’ve run 0 kilometres this week. It’s only Tuesday, but that’s 0 out of a target of 54. I don’t love a zero.?

Word to the wise: I’ve discovered in the last few months that the line between self-care and self-torture is a pretty fine one. Mog - she’s my inner critic* - and I have agreed that perhaps I’ve been erring on the wrong side of that equation recently. Mog says it's because running is ridiculous unless someone is chasing you, and since I won’t be winning any marathons, why would I bother? She’s also pointed out that someone else at Umuzi has already written something about running so it’s wholly unoriginal.

?I usually try to disagree with her on principle, but as my Garmin’s passive-aggressive reminders get louder, and the marathon date looms closer, I have to admit she’s not entirely wrong.

Mog, in her not-so-gentle way, also frequently reminds me that spending hours running every week seems absurd—especially when I’m juggling life as a mother-of-two-CEO-who-tries-not-to-order-takeout-every-night. And to be honest, some weeks, she’s right.

But it’s not just running that’s become more complex. At Umuzi, we’ve gone from a small team of 20 focused on local learnerships to a team of 45+, with global partners and a slate of ambitious projects. Back then, it felt busy and hard; now, it’s even busier, and the stakes are higher. Just like in all aspects of life - with time, the goalposts move, and the complexity grows.

The bigger we’ve grown, the more complex the challenges. We need better systems, and we’re pushing people to take on more responsibility, to grow in their ability to prioritise. We're solving bigger, more expensive problems, all while keeping the smaller ones from falling through the cracks.?

I struggle daily to find the balance between operational problem-solving and herding organisational cats toward an ambitious vision. But there is progress - we are getting fitter and stronger. We have structure, a vision and a plan. We have teammates who show up every single day, even when they are grumpy and tired and wondering what it is all for. And while there may be no easy sprint to the finish, I find real joy in that slog of being a part of something that will impact on young people for many years to come.

I've been reflecting on my life and work more than usual lately. Maybe it’s because I just turned 40, or because my littles aren’t so very little anymore. It could also be because I work with a mish-mash of Millennials and Gen Zs who are all about ‘balance’ and ‘emotions’, and constantly stretch me to pay more attention to both. Perspective is a funny thing. Many years ago, my husband and I came to a stark realisation: it’s nearly impossible to consistently succeed at work, eat homemade food, and exercise regularly. At best, we figured we could manage two out of three, and so we ate a lot of takeout.?

That was before our two children and two extra dogs. And before moving to the rurals where the Uber Eats sun doesn't shine. And before Umuzi.?

Fortunately, as we grow up, our perspectives shift. Mog would argue that this shift is less about my ability to juggle better and more about my ever-diminishing standards. She cuts deep.

My life, in its entirety, has developed a complexity that I couldn’t have fathomed at 25. Or maybe even at 35. But it is rich; with variety, with love, sometimes with balance, and with belief in my - and our - ability to make an unjust world just a smidgen better. To hold all these things though, I know that I need to learn to accept that winning isn’t the goal, that the pursuit of perfection is a fool’s errand and that progress isn’t linear. In every part of life, it’s about showing up, recalibrating when needed, and remembering that sometimes a zero on Strava, ordering takeout, or poorly hardcoding a spreadsheet (that you know full well both Mog and anyone who’s ever built a spreadsheet will undoubtedly make fun of later) is just part of the journey.?

*named for the forgetful cat who was never sure if she’d had dinner, and was a reluctant protagonist. Read into this what you will.?