Between Stars and Shadows: The Philosophy of Desire and Wish by Adnan Qaiser (A Psychological Contemplation of Longing and Fulfillment)

Ladies and Gentlemen:

Socrates had said, “He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have.”

In the realm of human wishes and desires, I have observed a striking contrast in the way people engage with the divine. When filled with hope, they lift their eyes to the heavens, as if seeking affirmation from the cosmos. Yet, in moments of despair, their gaze falls downward, as though the weight of their helplessness compels them to bow before the gravity of their suffering.

This instinctive act reflects a deeper truth about human nature—our desires are not merely personal whims but existential currents that shape our perception of fate, fulfillment, and purpose. Whether in silent prayers or restless longing, we are driven by an intrinsic need to reach beyond ourselves, yearning for something greater, something that either grants meaning or alleviates our incompleteness.

But what truly defines a wish, and how does desire shape the course of our lives? Is it a beacon guiding us forward or a shadow that endlessly eludes us?

The word “wish” originates from the Latin desiderare, which itself is composed of two elements: de and sidus, meaning “from” and “star,” respectively. The prefix de can carry an intensive value, suggesting that to wish is to gaze intensely at the stars, yearning for something to happen, for fate to intervene.

Alternatively, if de implies removal, desiderare could signify turning away from the stars—averting one’s gaze in disappointment when long-held hopes remain unfulfilled. This duality encapsulates the very nature of desire: an uplifting force that fuels aspiration, yet one that can also lead to despair.

Desire has long been a subject of philosophical scrutiny. For the Stoics, desire is a treacherous force, an insatiable hunger that leads to perpetual unrest. To them, true serenity is found in a state of ataraxia—inner calm and imperturbability—where one is free from the turbulence of endless wanting. The only way to escape suffering is to master one’s desires rather than be enslaved by them. To desire less is to suffer less.

The same lesson is taught in Buddhism. According to Buddha our grief and sufferings (Dukkha) result from our perpetual greed and avarice called Raga, Lobha or Ta?hā in Sanskrit or Pali languages.

Epicurus, on the other hand, offered a more nuanced view. He distinguished between necessary desires—those essential for survival, such as food, water, and shelter—and unnecessary desires, which often lead to excess and suffering. For him, wisdom lay in understanding which desires should be nurtured and which should be abandoned, for the pursuit of unnecessary desires breeds dissatisfaction and enslaves the soul to an endless cycle of longing.

Yet, desire is not merely a source of turmoil; it is also the engine of our existence, the fire that propels us forward. Without desire, there is no art, no poetry, and no exploration of the unknown. It is desire that gives birth to civilizations, fuels revolutions, and compels the human spirit to transcend its own limitations. Desire embodies hope, a force that compels us toward a goal, a dream, or the fulfillment of an absence we feel within ourselves.

But not all desires hold the same weight. A person often experiences dissatisfaction when they lack clarity about what they truly seek. In modern society, we frequently inherit our desires from external influences—social norms, media, and cultural expectations—believing that certain achievements, possessions, or lifestyles will bring us happiness.

We are taught to long for what dazzles rather than what fulfills, for what impresses others rather than what nourishes the soul.

True fulfillment arises only when we turn inward, silencing external noise to uncover our most authentic and intimate longings. Only through self-inquiry and deep reflection can we distinguish between fleeting cravings and profound aspirations.

Nietzsche aptly observed, “He who has a strong enough why can bear almost any how.” Understanding our deepest desires grants us the power not only to pursue them but to endure the journey with purpose and resilience.

And yet, there remains an inherent paradox: desire is both the source of suffering and the essence of becoming. To desire is to acknowledge lack, but it is also to affirm life itself. Perhaps, then, the wisest path is not to extinguish desire, but to refine it—to elevate it beyond mere acquisition and toward the pursuit of wisdom, beauty, and the sublime.

According to Abraham Maslow’s (April 1908 – June 1970) famous “hierarchy of needs,” man begins to demand a higher level of attainment upon fulfilment of his basic needs. For instance, the moment man’s basic physiological requirement of “food, shelter and security” are met, he begins to strive for “love and belonging,” followed by “esteem,” only to end up at “self-actualization.”

Thus, it is not the fulfillment of desire that defines us but the direction in which it leads us toward an accomplished and fulfilling life.

Desire, then, is both the fire that propels us and the burden that weighs upon us. It is a paradox—capable of elevating the soul toward transcendence yet equally capable of chaining it to perpetual dissatisfaction. The great thinkers of history have wrestled with this duality, some urging restraint, others championing the pursuit of passion as the essence of existence.

Ultimately, the question is not whether we should desire, but rather, how we should desire. Are we led by authentic longing, or are we merely echoing the borrowed aspirations of the world around us?

Perhaps true wisdom lies in refining our desires—learning to wish not merely for possession, but for purpose; not for fleeting gratification, but for enduring fulfillment. For in the end, it is not the act of wishing that defines us, but the depth and direction of what we wish for.

In his timeless wisdom, Rumi had observed that “You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens.”

Remember: What many people believe as the concept of God (for the fulfilment of all their longings and desires), others term as “quantum physics.”

Happy reading,

~ Adnan Qaiser ~

February 24, 2025

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