In Between Moments: Embracing Life's Uncertainty

“When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high. And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.” - John Greenleaf Whittier.

I was helping my daughter work through the poem, “Don’t Quit” by John Greenleaf Whittier. As we were working through it, I could not help but reflect on the in-between moments of life. It is common that when we think about our lives, we tend to focus on the big moments; the first time we got the big shandis - our arrival at Jozi, our first job, our first graduation, the time we were laid off, the time we bought our first car, the first time we heard someone say we are appreciated.

But what happens in between those moments?

In between the big moments of life, the moments that define our careers, the moments that change us, there are all these other countless small moments. And during these small moments there is a constant source of change: ourselves. We change because we grow older, we change because we learn new things, and we change because life forces us to adapt.

There is an old wisdom that life is essentially a journey of achievement. You set goals, attain them and are successful. That’s all well and good if you are living in the stone age. Our modern period is constantly changing, sometimes every day, and will continue to do so at an ever-increasing pace. The most useful way to think about our era is that of a constant process of adaptation rather than achievement: being ready for change instead of trying to achieve some goal or another outcome; being able to adjust quickly when the unexpected happens; developing resilience so that your plans don’t get derailed by whatever forces come along next.

Life is more about the journey, not so much about arriving at the destination. For every high moment, there will be an equal low moment; for every happy ending there is also an unhappy beginning. Embracing and adapting to the unexpected changes in life makes one open and ready for anything that may come your way. The best way is by focusing on the present moment - right now. We can't avoid the uncertainty of life; it's not something we can control or predict in advance, but we can be prepared for change and adapt to uncertainty. Rather than getting caught up in worrying about what could happen or feeling sorry for yourself because things didn't turn out exactly as planned, just focus on what you're doing in this very moment.

What helps me is thinking about my feelings as an opportunity for growth rather than something negative that needs fixing immediately! The answers to the intricacies of life can't be found in any one thing; they can only be found by examining all the different paths we take in our lives and considering which ones got us where we are now and drew us closer to where we want to be in the future. I'm going to embrace these in-between moments. I'm not sure if that will make me any less troubled, but it will undoubtedly chisel away at the numerous labels I've unfairly given myself over the years.

Next time you find yourself in a "moment between" - don't fight it; let it be. It's inevitable, and simply part of life's cycle.