To be better at controlling feelings of inadequacy do 9 things to improve.

I am surprised how many smart and incredibly talented people feel inadequate.

Feelings of inadequacy are painful and often inspired by the perception “we don’t measure up”.

Not feeling worthy is more common than most people realize, and little things can trigger a cascade of negative emotions that culminate in "feeling useless".

Understanding this insidious cycle can be challenging.? It normally starts with harsh self-criticism and is exacerbated by incessant social comparisons.

This negative pattern of self-debilitating noise often originates in childhood.?

We aren’t born feeling inadequate, but poor parenting is often the cause of kids that get the impression “They aren’t good enough”.

Once this unhealthy diagnosis of our potential begins, it’s difficult to break.

It’s like any other “bad habit”, it requires rewiring.

I believe there are four things that create feelings of inadequacy and 5 things we can do to prevent feeling inadequate.

“Imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together.”

To be successful at overcoming inadequacy try 9 things to improve:

Heres’ what might be happening:

Expectations

Unrealistic expectations can lead to a myriad of negative feelings, but they’re often the cause of feeling inadequate.? Expectations of people, colleagues, friends, bosses can create feelings of anticipation that seldom end favorably.? Assumptions about how we “should” feel predicated on someone’s contributions is a recipe for disaster.? Unrealistic emotional expectations are a primary reason many people “feel” inadequate.???? ??

Affirmation

Low self-confidence is a primary reason people feel inadequate.? Many people rely on outside affirmation to validate their self-esteem.? When we lack the ability to build authentic self-confidence based on internal parameters, we depend on people to offer affirmations to reinforce our fragile ego. When things outside our control constantly impact our feelings of self-worth, we lack the self-awareness required to manage our emotions.?????

Ruminate

I know many people that can’t let go of the past and move forward in the spirit of amelioration.? They dwell on negative history and beat themselves up over past mistakes.? This incessant cycle of pummeling themselves for previous setbacks fails to appreciate the importance of “healthy reflection”.? Focusing on learning from our mistakes is essential to leveraging past setbacks to make future improvements.?? ???

Values

One of the most important exercises in life is understanding our core values.? Without a clear idea of what inspires our soul and where we want to go, we relegate our future prospects for success to chance.? That’s never a good strategy.? Without a clear definition of what makes us tick, we often live our life according to someone else’s “idea of success”.? Identify our values and feel much less inadequate.???

“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.”

Heres’ how we can improve:

Dialogue

When feelings of inadequacy surface, show yourself some grace.? Begin by having a positive conversation with yourself.? Realizing negative feelings of inadequacy were probably transpired in our childhood helps obviate blame and guilt.? Realizing we are “feeling” inadequate is very different than “being inadequate”.??

Context

Appreciating we aren’t alone and understanding that many people suffer from the same sense of poor self-esteem helps reframe the magnitude of our catastrophic thinking.? We are all human, we are all fallible and we are all hurt.

Move

The best way to start feeling better.? Move your body.? Whenever you feel low, exercise.? It’s the magical remedy for feeling lethargic.? Activity is always a great way to produce the positive feelings that help us recalibrate and start feeling better.?

Confidence

Building better confidence is critical for being comfortable taking calculated risks.? The more success we enjoy, the more confident we become.? Confidence needs to be genuine and there’s no short cuts for creating confidence.? Hold your head high and embrace the hard work of personal and professional improvement.

Adversity

Many people just don’t like adversity.? Fear and uncertainty have a funny way of depleting our drive and ambition.? We can’t allow it.? We need to work through the pain and embrace the discomfort of personal growth.? Once we learn to appreciate the power of overcoming adversity, life gets measurably better and so do our feelings of inadequacy.??

“Confront your inadequacies and push your personal boundaries: It’s the surest way to grow, improve and expand the scope of your influence.”

Sum it up.

Any other suggestions for overcoming inadequacy?? Share your thoughts in the comments section and please like and share this article. I love learning from you as well.

About Steve:

Steve Wohlenhaus is CEO of Weatherology, the leading company in the world at disseminating audio weather information.?? Steve began his career as a major market television weather anchor in Minneapolis, where he received several Emmy Awards for science programming.? Steve is the author and host of the podcast program Anatomy of Success.? Reach out and connect with me on LinkedIn.? Learn more about my work and grab the free Weatherology mobile app by clicking any picture in this article!