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Is it Better Being in an unhappy Relationship?

Annette Tavitian

Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Counselling |Adult Childhood Trauma |

发布日期: 2023年1月29日

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Is it better staying in an unhappy relationship?

It's the ultimate question!

Should you choose to just be in a relationship, for the sake of it, or be alone and wait for the right one to come along?

One may argue that the right one may not come along, but I'm of the belief that it will happen if you want it to.

I am fortunate to have met so many people in my life both older and middle aged though who have healthy relationships, who are able to work through their issues together. They may not always be happy, but they are happy enough that they want to stay together, and make it work.

When asked what kept them together - "Communication".

So when do you need to make the decision to call it quits?

That comes with it's own repercussions, and any split with your partner should be made carefully. If the relationship is with a Narcissist especially, you need to ensure that you have the right support available to you.

Having a relationship with a Narcissist can be incredibly challenging. If you are thinking that you can change a Narcissist, then you probably should rethink that one again. Unless that person is actually willing to change, put in the work and show you that they want to make the effort - assume that it's not going to happen until it does.

Clients with Narcissists often tell me these reasons for staying together:

For the kids
Because they have mutual friends
Their parents like their partner
He's a good person
They deserved to be spoken rudely to by the partner
Afraid of being alone
They can change him
He's financially supporting them
They provoked him being mad
He's a drunk but he promised to go to AA

Do these reasons sound valid to you? Maybe some.

Society has placed so much emphasis on the importance of relationships, that we forget that we can be happy for short bursts without having intimate relationships. This doesn't mean indefinitely, but especially jumping from one toxic relationship to another toxic relationship is going to be detrimental and unhealthy.

Comfort and codependency are another big reason why people fail to let go of toxic relationships, as we get used to having someone around their prescence becomes comforting. Physical sex, words of affirmation, physical affection are all wants and needs we have.