#BeTheChange: From Adaptation to Transformation

?“Change is the end result of all true learning.” – Leo Buscaglia

Every day we learn to adapt to new circumstances.?We had to abruptly adapt to the new norm with the pandemic, which made it more noticeable.?But if you stop and think, you’ve been doing it your whole life. However, the changes that we crave the most, those things for which we’ve been getting feedback for a while, may not be so simple for us to achieve. I would like to share with you an excerpt from my book, which you will soon be able to read, to illustrate my thoughts on how we can make those changes that we desire so much.

“Today, virtually everyone speaks in any area of change, evolution and transformation. It’s just that there’s a lot of confusion as to what change is and what it entails. Repeating it aloud as a mantra does not help us understand it better, but rather feel more frustrated. It’s like we should know it, do it, understand it and not necessarily be able to.

Why is it so hard for us to change the things we want to change? Because we tend to assume that a simple idea is enough to modify our behaviors or those of the people around us. Almost immediately after hearing something we like or that challenges us, our mind convinces us that we can do so without considering the magnitude of the effort required. The idea of effortlessly changing those things that we crave the most, and are counterintuitive in many cases to the way we do things, is a common trap, which activates especially when we’re immerse in ourselves. Incredibly enough – or not so much – only when we project it on others, we become aware that it is not possible, that there is no sustainable transformation without conscience and dedication.

Understanding is not the same as knowing how to do it

If we knew how to do it, we wouldn’t have to learn it, and we probably wouldn’t even have to think about it. We’d be doing it by now!

In so many years of working with leaders and teams, I found countless examples of people and systems (teams, organizations, etc.) who claim to know something, even something they are passionate about, and that is key to their future, but they are unable to get it up and running. I encountered people who managed to achieve major changes, just to forget them at the first hurdle and take refuge, almost automatically, in their old habits and behaviors, which they themselves consider unproductive. And I’ve also seen many cases, where they managed to begin a path of profound transformation with lasting impact.

We’ve all been through these situations and we’ve been/are still “those people” in many cases. I have no doubt that those who are reading these words will be able to quickly identify many concrete examples of the difference between understanding conceptually versus making it happen and transforming, both in themselves and in others. The question is what will we do about it now, tomorrow, or when we re-realize that we are not just talking about people around us, but about ourselves as well.”

Powerful question to ask yourself:

What ingrained belief about?myself prevents me?from achieving a change I want?

Make change happen:

1. Choose one thing, just one thing, that you’ve really been wanting to change and that would have a high impact on your life (work, team, family)
2. Ask 3 people you trust why do they think this is hard for you.
3. Engage them to help you let go of your old-way and practice the new-way in a specific real-life situation
4. Make an appointment with yourself! Schedule 30 minutes weekly (add to your calendar now!) to reflect on what you learned so far and what you can do better in the next conversations
5. Try this for 4 weeks, and let’s see what happens!