This is the best thing I did in 2019 - and you should do it too...

At the start of 2019 I got an email from my HR lead which turned my stomach upside down. The email was short and straightforward: Do you want to be a mentor? 

My first reaction was doubt.

What if I fail to inspire my mentee and end up letting her down?

Do I have the experience?

What can I really bring to the table?

And then I felt the adrenaline. You know that rush you get when a challenge comes your way? That’s exactly the feeling I got that made me squish any negative thoughts. 

So, I said yes. 

Now that we’re a few months into it, this mentorship program has been one of the best things I’ve done in 2019. It’s made me grow personally and professionally. Which is why I highly recommend it to everyone reading. If you want to do something truly meaningful in 2020 but you’re scared you don’t have what it takes to be a mentor, then these 10 points are for you. 

1. Don’t underestimate yourself: It’s easy to be hard on yourself and assume you don’t have any value to add. Take a step back and put together a list of your skills and what a person can learn from you. Ask your colleagues how they benefit from working with you. It’s not just about the technical aspects; think about your soft skills too. In fact, this is how we were matched - I had the skill set my mentee was specifically looking for.
2.  Don’t rush the process: When we first met I knew the most important thing to do was to listen. I didn’t try to find any solutions on the spot or to create a plan. Instead, I listened to her fears, expectations and aspirations. Later, we talked more about her goals, what we wanted from our mentorship relationship and our expectations of each other. Only then, I created a plan with a specific timeline for each goal.
3. Stay on track: While the energy is high at the beginning of a mentorship relationship - things can fizzle out if you don’t have a blueprint laid out. I find the best way to hold both of you accountable is to create a plan together. This way you can be sure the goals will be met. You can decide how flexible you want to be. Of course be mindful of the pace your mentee wants to follow; although there’s nothing wrong with challenging them from time to time.
4.  You don’t have to have all the answers: There’s courage and bravery in admitting your weaknesses. Don’t worry when there’s something you can’t do yourself. If you don’t have the answer to something ask around, research or check with other mentors to find out how they’ve done it. For example, my mentee really wanted to improve the quality of her writing. While I don’t think I’m a bad writer, I don’t think I have the skillset to teach it. So I decided to surprise her with a writing course with the person who helped me find my own voice, Eva Fernandes. 
5. Set your own rules: Leave all your misconceptions of what a mentorship should look like behind and do what you need to do. My mentee and I set our own terms of engagement and decided to finish one goal at a time. We’ve taken it at our own pace.  
6. Share inspiration whenever you see it – it could be a quote, a little book, a movie, you name it! I decided to share the books that I found useful in my own growth journey – ‘Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway’ by Susan Jeffers and ‘Mindset’ by Carol Dweck. They’ve made a tremendous impact on my life and so I passed it on to my mentee.  
7. Don’t put an expiry date on the mentorship: In my head, this is long-term. It’s not just a year and then we forget all about it. It’s an ongoing process - the way it should be. When I look back at my own career, I know there are a lot of people who have positively influenced me because they took a long-term approach to our relationship. In fact, I still speak to all of my (unofficial) mentors. Once you establish that special connection, it never really goes away.
8.  Be ready to learn from your mentee: While you may have the official title as the mentor, the advice and learning will not always be coming from the top down. You’ve got just as much to learn from her as she has to learn from you. Tamara taught me how to understand and read people better and put my misconceptions of people aside. Before we started working together, I mistook her reluctance to take part in work projects for indifference. Now I realize all she needed was a small push to show what she’s capable of. 

9. Mentor someone outside of your team: Unlike the relationship between an employee and boss, a mentorship relationship has a lot more distance. This means you don’t get involved in the day-to-day tasks. Instead you can focus more on the deeper questions about purpose and life. In the process, you’ll end up taking a long hard look at yourself and learn a thing or two. 

10. Don’t make it all about work: In fact, I challenged Tamara to face one of our fears together – the fear of height. We’ve agreed to go ziplining together. I know this will help us establish a stronger bond together. Mentorship is not only about showing your strengths for your mentee to draw from, it’s also being brave enough to show your vulnerabilities, fears and insecurities, and how you can overcome them. We’re all human after all. (Pictures on this will be shared as soon as we do it!) 

As 2019 draws to an end, I can say that this mentorship has been a truly rewarding experience - we both helped each other navigate the challenges of work and life. I know that not only did I gain a mentee, I also gained a friend. And if you know me, then you know that for me, human connections are what matter to me the most. 

Have you mentored or been mentored? What would you add to this list? Let me know in the comments section below.

About me: I'm a mom of three and have been living in Dubai for the past 12 years. I’ve been working at OMD since 2008, kicking off in the branded entertainment unit and currently managing our company's marketing. When I'm not working, I'm either spending time with family, watching my favorite football team, Juventus, (hopefully) make it to the Champions League finals, or trying out new recipes that I post on @GeminiBakes https://www.instagram.com/geminibakes

You can also find me on Twitter: @loul81(although I don't tweet as much as I used to!)