The best messages are lived

When love beckons to you, follow him, though his ways are hard and steep. For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning. —Khalil Gibran

Happy Ruby Anniversary, Margot Azmann . Same place, same sunshine and beautiful view, 40 years later. "The best messages are lived," it's said and that "a picture is worth a thousand words." So what might we have seen and learned in all this time together?

Most of all that love is such a big word, a faint recollection of universal life we seldom enjoy in this world. But as I always told our children: It is a vital achievement of social intelligence to interest others in you, let alone encouraging someone to wish to stay with you for a while or even for the rest of their life, and to continue to discover reasons causing you to frequently fall in love with each other all over again, while not taking for granted and losing sight of all the good and beautiful you've found already.

Secondly, in situations like this, you can always see how those photographed feel about the person taking their picture. Look again and see what we are seeing: Marcel, our third son – still recovering from serious long covid, the loss of his job, and his girlfriend leaving – and his gradual but beautiful recovery and return to life.

Thirdly, what are we continuing to give each other in recent years to show love and appreciation? Only what we believe has real and lasting value. No extravagant gifts, no new car, no extraordinary lifestyle, no expensive holidays – just the starting of A Chance for Happiness Foundation seven years ago, engaged in awareness raising regarding Mental Health and Wellbeing following the suicide of our then 18 years old daughter Lisa, and presently our organization of the new World Mental Health Forum . At our Facebook presence https://lnkd.in/dVxmg_GC you can see, in chronological order, what we've done so far.

Meanwhile, not for anyone's praise, but because it makes a big difference in terms of focus and motivation:

In all this time, we have never turned our many activities into a business, paying anyone's wages or even so much as personal expenses, unless absolutely necessary, from any donations we received to do this work. Simply because taking even a small source of light where there is no longer any left is far too sacred for us to eventually muddy the waters by running a mental health lecturing and conference and being part of everyone's party and network and on and on and on business. To us, it just doesn't feel right.

And finally, of course, you can see how Margot and I feel just coming out of yet another extremely difficult time for us in terms of our recent London Mental Health Week 2023 experience. Because after all these years of working and saving and excitedly looking forward to it, we made our biggest mistake yet, based on well-intentioned assumptions regarding temporary partnerships we thought for sure we could safely rely on. But we are learning and our memoirs since Lisa's passing in 2014 are another harrowing chapter of heartbreaking adventures with our fellow human beings richer.

So after all is said and done, I wonder: How then, instead of simply giving up, do we eventually turn into exceptional human beings? And my answer is: Think about it. Humiliation is a wonderful experience. It keeps us ever more about the work and less and less about ourselves. If we refuse to deal with it, how serious are we?

After all, we are not going to be respected and loved for suggesting to change a world that always wants to stay the way it is. As German poet Johann Wolfgang von Goethe asked, in effect: What is it, therefore, about this force, far from understood, that in forever seeking evil creates nothing but good?

And that change we are all seeking also means that we simply cannot continue doing business with each other relying on the same mindset that got us into this terrible global situation in the first place. There is a tremendous task before us, so let's keep going. Respected and loved or not, it's worth it.

"When love beckons to you, follow him, though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning. Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun, so shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself. He threshes you to make you naked. He sifts you to free you from your husks. He grinds you to whiteness. He kneads you until you are pliant; and then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of life's heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure, then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor, into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.

When you love you should not say, 'God is in my heart,' but rather, 'I am in the heart of God.' And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course." —Khalil Gibran

Personally, I am tired of a world talking about how much it knows while passively watching how little of it is actually done. And quoting from @asxmaali on X (Twitter): "Speaking up for things that align with your values doesn't ruin your career, it clears the way for you to have an ethical one." We extend our heartfelt invitation.

Descending Sophia (2022), mischtechnik (oil and egg tempera on polycotton) by Daniel Mirante and now in the permanent collection of www.achanceforhappiness.museum. Sophia, Greek σοφ?α, was an important Hellenistic, Platonic, and Gnostic concept denoting cleverness, intelligence, and wisdom, even forming the root of the word philosophy, meaning "love of wisdom".

World Mental Health Forum. Because mental health and wellbeing are everyone's business. For more information on how to join forces and work together, please get in touch at office(at)worldmentalhealthforum.com. A 100% charitable initiative rather than a self-serving enterprise.

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