The Best Leaders Frame Their Communications Around These Words: Here Are Three Ways You Can, Too

One of my favorite leaders, Oprah Winfrey, famously said: "What I know for sure: Words matter." 

As a writer, I share her belief. Words have the power to support and uplift, improve moods and nurture souls. They are essential for life, but can quickly destroy one as well. 

Consider then, for a moment, the words that you use—or don't use—with others.

As a leader, every time you open your mouth in a meeting or sit down at your laptop to craft an email, the words you choose send a message. The best leaders understand this and frame their communications around these essential words: Someone's always listening.

While that may seem obvious, this fact is often overlooked, particularly in today's frenetically-paced work environments where we're often juggling multiple projects. Yet when you are mindful and intentional with your communications, you can use them to connect, educate, and inspire your colleagues, clients and partners.

Here are three ways to up your awareness of your audience and improve your communications:

1. Be mindful of what you say (even if you don't utter a word).

Try as we might, it's nearly impossible not to let the happenings of our day—the good, the bad and the ugly—impact us. Whether it's the delight of hearing exceptionally good news, or the frustration of discovering your new puppy has destroyed your shoe, we're human, and we're fooling ourselves if we think we can mask those things at the office.

The truth? We're all mirrors. What you project is what you reflect, and others will pick up on this, even when you don't mention it. So if you're still angry about your pup's new chew toy when you begin a meeting with your colleagues, you may send off unintended and negative non-verbal cues. Remember, they're still "listening" to you, even if you're not speaking. Rather than have your team believe you're upset with them, consider sharing upfront what happened. This provides two benefits: a way to make you more human and relatable to your team so they can empathize with you, and eliminating any possible miscommunication.

2. Understand that sharing your wisdom transforms it into something even more powerful.

Wisdom is the ability to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense and insight. But it transforms into something truly powerful when it is shared through your written and spoken words.

Why?

Because all the wisdom in the world is meaningless without application. When you freely share your wisdom, you provide value to others. Your observations enrich their lives. You help them think about their situations in an entirely new light and encourage possibilities to emerge.

And when you do this on a regular basis, those most important to you will look to you as a guidepost, a trusted thought leader who strives to serve others by communicating the lessons they’ve learned in an engaging and compelling way.

3. Who your "audience" is—and what they need to hear—might surprise you.

The funny thing about communication is that even after you acknowledge that someone is always listening, you never know who that someone listening might turn out to be. Or which of your messages will strike a chord with that person.

It's easy for your communications to get lost in a sea of email. And you're constantly competing with a multitude of social media platforms and real-life conversations, so you never really know if something resonates. Until you do.

Recently, and on several occasions, I was surprised to learn that my words had inspired someone and that I had had a significant impact on their life. While it pleased me immensely, these people were not who I would have thought were my audience, nor were the pieces they referenced what I necessarily considered my greatest work. But no matter. It served as an important reminder of Oprah's belief: Words matter.

Never underestimate the immense power of your words to connect with others. Someone is always listening and probably needs to hear your message, even if you (and they) might not realize it at the time.

This article first appeared on Forbes.com.

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???Amy Blaschka is a ghostwriter who helps leaders communicate and connect better. Contact her if you'd like her help.?

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