The Best Have No Preferences

“The Great Way is not difficult for those who have no preferences. When love and hate are both absent everything becomes clear and undisguised. Make the smallest distinction, however, and heaven and earth are set infinitely apart.” - Sengstan

The best Aikidoists have no preferences…

The other day in class, a student was having a difficult time doing kotegaeshi with their partner. As I walked by, the student looked at me with an expression as if to say, “It’s not me, it’s them!” When I inquired, he said in a hushed tone, “He's not taking the right ukemi.” I told him, “That might be true, but you are struggling because of your expectation as to how they ‘should’ be taking your ukemi rather than accepting their limitations and modifying your movement based upon what they can do.”

Furuya Sensei’s Zen master Bishop Kenko Yamashita used to say, “Nandemo omoidori ni ikanai” (何でも思い通りに行かない) which means “Nothing goes the way you want it to.” The Bishop’s words illustrate a fundamental point in martial arts training - we are not in control of anything outside of ourselves.

In class, many of us are perfectionists and want everything to be “just right.” In a class setting this might be ok because as we are learning the kata of the technique. Kata and repetition are how the techniques enter into our subconscious and become second nature. If we ever have to actually use our Aikido in a self-defense situation, it will be similar but not exactly the same. If we expect that the other person will move like our partners move in class, we will be sadly mistaken. If we can modify our movement to the situation or the attacker, we have a greater chance of being successful. To move accordingly, we will have to be fluid. This fluidity in Aikido can be thought of as ki no nagare (氣の流れ) or “the flow of ki.” Fluidity and spontaneity can only come after we have mastered the basics and those basic movements have effectively entered into our subconscious.

The main thing which impedes our ability to be fluid is our ego’s desire to maintain control and stave off uncertainty. To have a preference or a way in which we want something to go is a form of control. We want control and shy away from uncertainty because we think that will help us manage fear. However, fear is not something to be controlled but only accepted. This is where the Bishop’s words become poignant. When we can accept that nothing goes the way we want it to, we can accept that the fear exists, and we can loosen the grip it has over us.

It is not that we should be robots devoid of wants and desires. Allowing things to be as they “are” is a mindset. A trained martial artist has realized that control of anything external is just an illusion and thus all we can do is ride the tide. In the end, the only thing we can control is ourselves in this one moment.? Perhaps that is why the legendary swordsman Miyamoto Musashi listed “accept things as they are” as his first tenet to live by.

Life and Aikido training will be filled with ups and downs. When something untoward happens, it is only natural that it causes us to become upset. We get upset because that undesirable thing smacks up against our sense of entitlement and we don’t feel that we deserve it. The best Aikidoists know that the only thing that they truly have control over is themselves and how they act and react when something uncomfortable happens. Realizing this, that is why the best have no preferences.

Today’s goal: Go with the flow. Happiness comes to those who have no preferences.

This post appears in a slightly different form @ www.aikidocenterla.com/blog