Best Friends | #MyFridayStory No. 315

Few treasures in life compare to a best friend. While friends may come and go, best friends are those rare gems who stand the test of time.

Throughout your life, friendships emerge and drift apart naturally. Lives intersect for a season, then diverge onto new paths. With over 8 billion people and counting, our connected world fosters more encounters than ever before. The number of lasting bonds remains capped, however. The average adult can actively maintain just 150 friends, according to Dr Robin Dunbar’s seminal “Dunbar’s Number” concept. Your roster ebbs and flows based on personality, geography, career stage, and community engagement. Still, best friends float to the top. They transcend the mean no matter where you roam.

In her Psychology Today article “Children’s Growing Friendships,” Dr Elleen Kennedy-Moore outlines the developmental stages of friendship from childhood into adulthood. She compares it to learning to walk – friendship skills strengthen with age and experience.

Dr Kennedy-Moore created a four-stage model of this progression:

Stage 1 (toddler to age 9): “I want it my way!” Friendships are selfish rather than cooperative.

Stage 2 (ages 9-12): “Two-Way, Fair-Weather Cooperation.” Friends follow social rules but lack deep bonds.

Stage 3 (ages 8-15): “Caring and Sharing.” True intimacy emerges during this period.

Final Stage (age 12+): “Friends Through Thick and Thin.” Mature, compassionate friendships take hold for life.

But best friends—they’re a breed apart.

They’re the rare gems who care deeply about your well-being, heart and soul. And you care just as much in return—that reciprocal care is key. In most healthy friendships there’s mutual giving and taking. But your bestie gives freely from the heart, no scorecard kept. They’ve got your back—and your heart too.

Yes. True blue best friends are precious few.

I was blessed with a handful of those lifelong gems. Met my first one at five years young. His Cypriot family lived a block down, and his older sisters introduced us. From that day on, me and my best mate were glued at the hip through primary and high school. We drifted apart for a stretch during the grown-up years—jobs, marriages, moves and all. But we found our way back thanks to some old school buddies.

Soon after befriending my first lifelong buddy, he introduced me to my next bosom friend from two blocks over. His Cypriot family resided on one of those leafier, grander streets in the area, with a dazzling pool overlooking the valley - a contrast from most houses in our neck of the woods. When summer heat hit, we’d bundle our swimming costumes in a towel and plunge into its refreshingly cold water. We bonded inseparably into adulthood, never losing touch.

A year later, a new family moved onto our block, just doors down. I met another lifelong best mate. We’ve never lost touch and remain steadfast friends through thick and thin to this day. With the rugby field spanning before our homes, all of us local kids united there in play. My new friends and I attended the same institutions, quickly becoming steadfast pals to this day.

I gained two more best friends during my adult years.

At 38, I began reporting to a company director 7 years my junior. As an owner, he could influence my career and doubted my abilities at first. But 8 months of head-knocking later I’d over-delivered on bold promises. Somewhere amidst the scuffles I’d earned his deepest respect. We’re besties for life having survived many challenges and enjoyed victories aplenty.

Around then I also met a chairman and CEO who mentored our executive team. After his presentation I walked him out while he quipped, “I see you’re the energy here!” His 40th birthday party invite sparked another priceless friendship and mentorship that continues to bless my life. His family care for me more deeply than I deserve.

The truest friendships linger in your heart eternally. I’m thankful God allowed me several of those precious gems.

Happy Springbok Day!

Happy Reconciliation Day for tomorrow!

Have an awesome long weekend and please remember to be generous! ??

As always, thanks for reading ??

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