BEST ADVICE: Let Go...
Jasbindar Singh
? Growing Emerging Leaders ? Online Emerging Leader Programme on Influencing Skills ? Leadership Launchpad ? Executive Coach ? Coaching Psychologist
Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.
Hermann Hesse
Life can be messy.
Things happens as we get thrown curve balls.
We do our best to be to have things in control BUT how much control do we really have?
Perhaps this is a message for all the perfectionists amongst us!
When we try and 'exert' control in a situation where we don't have much control, we experience more stress and an exacerbation of our physical and emotional vulnerabilities.
If you are a manager you may be holding on and not delegating well.
As owner of a SME, by not letting go, you may be getting hooked into working in the business, not on it.
As a business leader - rather than be adaptive - you may be fighting the larger macro trends going in a direction you had not anticipated, wanted or planned for.
Perhaps the best we can do is to the following:
- Recognise that PERFECTIONISM and the need for high control
especially against the tide, comes at at COST - CONTROL what we can and LET GO off what we can't
- Be ADAPTIVE and
- Adopt a GROWTH MINDSET of learning and mastery
- Trust, coach, MOTIVATE and ENGAGE others better
In our personal lives also, trying to control ultimately leads to a life full of frustration as we clash against another's free will.
So how about you?
Where are you on the continuum of high versus low need for control?
Of course having a low need for control or being flexible DOES NOT MEAN letting go off standards. But ultra high, inflexible standards along with trying to control what is outside our realm, is inevitably not only impossible but hard to sustain.
Recognising this, on the other hand, could mean being more realistic, easing up on yourself and those around you and enjoying the journey along the way.
In our personal relationships, it could also mean live and let live.
Your thoughts?
Click here if you would like to connect or you can FOLLOW ME as per above.
If you are looking for a speaker, facilitator or coach, call me at +64 27 280 3335 or via [email protected]
As a leadership coach, team facilitator and speaker, I love working with organisations and savvy managers and leaders to grow and engage their teams better. I also love speaking to different audiences on such topics including finding and living our mojo and leadership and life transitions.
For further articles on careers, leadership, personal and professional development, sign here for your free monthly newsletter https://eepurl.com/FvR1r
Other leadership posts you might find of value:
What makes for great leadership
How to Influence with Integrity
Calling all introverted leaders
Creativity in Leadership and Entrepreneurship
Image courtesy of Danilo Rizzuti at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
PhD, MPhil, PGD, BSc, Chem.Tech. Eng, Text. Tech, C.Text ATI, C.Col SDC, Diplomate SDC ~ The University of Leeds
9 年Letting go off is sometimes the most difficult proposition there is Jasbindar Singh especially when emotionally involved.! it is fascinating, some times them emotions could even be platonic and yet how difficult to let go off after you have found them. 'Thank You'
Lecturer, Health Management, Divine Word University
9 年Those who fear failure before embarking has already failed the efforts for success. Those who are brave are those that take the challenge! Good leadership issue.
Assurance, Advisory, Consulting, Risk Management, Resilience | CISA | CISM | CISSP
9 年Thanks Jasbindar. Great piece of leadership advice. The act to control can be replaced by "influence" in most situations, and it puts a different perspective on things. Having the ability to influence decisions, situations, deals, environments, etc may be far more powerful than wanting to influence.
Assistant Inspector at Comptroller of Maryland
9 年To sum it up in one word, proactive! Taking a proactive approach will allow you to anticipate potential problems, adapt to change, empower employees and be a servant leader.
Analista de Gest?o em Saúde na Fiocruz
9 年Amyr Klink, Brazilian sailor, in his book "Dreams Management" is a phrase that says right on the point that you make. There is a time when you look at your boat and redo all the planning several times. Not lack anything but you are there on the pier watching the boat. It is the time of departure. At some point you just have to loosen the grip and begin the journey. Go! Otherwise, you begin to doubt yourself, get to Temar crossing and run the risk of never unberthing your boat.