Best Advice: Find Salvation Through Comedy
Okay, I realize that I'm not as funny as I think I am, which Mrs. Newmark will remind me about now and then.
However, sometimes I want to confront people with an unpleasant truth, and confrontation often makes thing worse. (By "truth", I mean what I think is the truth; please adjust for that.)
In the mid-eighties at IBM Detroit, I had a really good manager, John S., who told me that my confrontational habit had polarized my coworkers. They either hated what I told 'em or loved it. He pointed out that my sense of humor might be my only saving grace.
It took little time for me to realize he was right, and that in practice, it frequently didn't matter if I was right. Aaron Sorkin got it right in the movie A Few Good Men:
Tom Cruise, in character, demands "I want the truth!" and Jack Nicholson responds: "You can't handle the truth!"
Maybe 20 years after watching the movie, I realized that comedy is what allows humans to understand an unpleasant truth.
Sometimes it doesn't matter if I'm not really all that funny, or have any more good material. As Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David reminded George Costanza, it's okay leaving them wanting more:
Okay, I really do realize I ain't all that funny, but it works.
I'm never going to do standup comedy, but in that spirit, please remember to tip the waiters!
In the meantime, check this out...
Project Manager
9 年He thinks about Science development..
Co-founder at BillionairesBrain.com
9 年It's like sandwiching a painful criticism in between flattery and earned praises
Senior Software Engineer at Ripple Labs
9 年Comedy works better in UK firms than US firms. Joan Rivers would be at home in a UK firm, but probably fired in a US firm. British comedy is largely about poking fun at life, oneself and people in general. In the US, you can easily offend people when you try to introduce the back-and-forth teasing you get in the House of Commons. It's a bit like playing tennis with someone who refuses to hit the ball back.
Android Developer
9 年It works for some and not for others being on both the giving and receiving end. Remember: just because a few people find you funny, it doesn't mean that you are the kind that wins awards. Don't get mad if someone doesn't find you funny. There's a reason why people have meltdowns on American Idol when the judge that someone idolizes just told them that they simply aren't that good. You can easily be a jerk by being confrontational, yet having the wrong kind of humor. It can also really humiliate or embarrass someone. Be aware of situations that may be happening to someone, and check out someone's body language if you tell a joke, especially when bad news is given. Dina Claire said it best (one of the vocal coaches I have worked with): we all come from different life experiences, so what the guy next to you likes is different. People also have different levels of ability to accept feedback. Some people, like me, will hire people just for their feedback, vocal coaches in my case. Others just can't take it. Note that the ones that seek out the coach tend to have a better chance at winning something like American Idol Comedy is powerful. If your manager said it was your saving grace, the chances that you are good at it is higher, but remember the manager's field. Does he have a Bachelor Degree in comedy, or one in Computer Science? It can heal, but it can hurt.
Architecture & Design, Territory Sales Manager, Southern California
9 年According to Linked In, I have 8 qualities in common with you, Craig Newmark. However, after reading this article, I must add a 9th, and that is believing I'm funnier than I am, and a 10th, understanding the value of humor to teach lessons of hard-edged truth. Q:What is the quickest way to penetrate the heart? A: Laughter