Benevolent Detachment

We are inundated with input. Blog posts, videos, commentaries, newsfeeds. A part of discernment is to filter all this, determine where we really need to focus. And that doesn’t include the stories which showcase the dark side of humanity, many of which are designed to touch our hearts. And can lead to worry and concern over the state of the world, our families, others we love and care for. Even with tight parameters, the amount of information, the problems of the world, can seem overwhelming.

The Question How do we maintain our sanity, our sense of calmness and peace, in the middle of all this? Yes, we can delink our technology. But how do we delink mentally and emotionally? How do we maintain our equilibrium, care for our souls?

Who Are We? In order to learn who we really are, to understand why we exist, to have clarity around our purpose, we must have a place in our lives where we are removed from the materialism, entertainment, diversion, and busyness that the Vanity Fair of our society and culture immerse us in.

In “The Ascent to Truth”, Thomas Merton says: “We look for rest and if we find it, it becomes intolerable. Incapable of the divine activity which alone can satisfy (rest)…fallen man flings himself upon exterior things, primarily for the sake of agitation which keeps his spirit pleasantly numb…and diverts us from the one thing which can help us begin our ascent to truth…the sense of our own emptiness.”

Benevolent Detachment Among those many activities which can keep us from rest are worry and concern. Whether for sick parents, a troubled friend, the most recent mass shooting, or losses due to war and other depravity. Worry and concern, even when or perhaps especially when grounded in something noble, can be a very heavy load. And with social media, the immediacy of text messages and personal phone numbers, it is as if the world can enter our personal space at any time.

What to do? Practice benevolent detachment. Choose intentionally to mentally and emotionally delink. Sit. In silence. And release everything. Every worry. Every concern. Every item on the checklist left undone. Release it. All of it. And invite peace, calmness, and stillness into your soul. Start a daily habit of 15 minutes of complete physical, mental, and emotional silence and peace.

There is a reason books such as “Boundaries” and “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A…” are selling millions. Push back. Insist on breathing room and personal space. Solomon said that a kind man benefits himself. Do this. Take care of your soul.

Credit Where Due Much of the writing I do on these topics is instructed by author John Eldredge. I’ve read most of his books multiple times over the last 25 years. Given my personal journey, they have been an absolute Godsend. I recommend his work.