The Benefit of the Best Assumptions

Recently, I’ve landed some interviews as a guest on podcasts. It’s been fun to talk about Master Storytelling, meet great hosts, and find interesting podcasts I didn’t know about before. None of the podcasts have aired yet, but I’ll let you know when they do.

?A couple of weeks ago, I had an interview set with a podcast I was excited to be on. Imagine my disappointment when less than 24 hours before the scheduled interview I got an email from the podcast interview coordinator saying the host had a personal conflict come up and they would have to reschedule. They left me with a web link to set a new time for our conversation.

In that moment when I’m feeling a bit disappointed, I have choices that will determine how I act going forward. I could choose to feel disrespected – hey, I set aside valuable time and they think their time is more important than mine. If I take that approach, I may be so offended that I won’t reschedule.

I decided to take the other approach. While I was disappointed, I still thought of times when this has happened to me – when I’ve had last-minute, unplanned emergencies that create conflicts. I wasn’t intending to be disrespectful, so I assumed the same good intent for the podcast host. After all, she did reach out with an apology. So, I rescheduled and looked forward to our next appointment.

When we connected on Zoom for the make-up appointment, the first thing the podcast host did was to apologize profusely for having to reschedule. Here’s the second place where choosing to think the best about the host’s reason for rescheduling becomes important. I was able to honestly say that it didn’t bother me and reassure her that I harbored no ill will toward her. If I had been feeling irritated about the reschedule, I might have said the right words, but the host would have known they were insincere.

As it was, she expressed gratitude – and some relief – that I wasn’t bothered by the reschedule. We had a wonderful conversation for the podcast, and I feel like I’ve made a new friend. I even got an unsolicited endorsement from the host at the end of the podcast!

What if I’d still been a little irritated by the reschedule? Not only would I have risked the apology not being fully accepted, but the rest of the conversation could have been stilted. And I’m guessing I wouldn’t have made a new friend or gotten the endorsement.

We live in a day and age where it’s easy to make negative assumptions about people’s motives or to take offense easily. Don’t believe me? Go read your social media feed. Let’s reverse that trend. Give other people the same level of consideration you would like to be given. As you do so, you’ll open yourself to more opportunities and greater friendships. Who knows – you may even get an endorsement.

Mark Carpenter helps people who want to improve the impact of their messages by improving their ability to convey powerful experiences as stories. He is a consultant, facilitator, coach, and co-author of the best-selling book "Master Storytelling: How to Turn Your Experiences Into Stories that Teach, Lead, and Inspire." www.master-storytelling.com