Believing the Little Voice that Says “You Must”

This is a platform to share the radical pivots, risks, self-evaluations and reflections of people I admire. We dig into the moments that led the people in their lives to go, “She Did What?!” and ultimately, to their personal or professional metamorphosis.

Alyse Nelson is a leader of leaders.? As the president and CEO of Vital Voices Global Partnership, Alyse leads the strategic vision of Vital Voices. She has dedicated her career to the mission of investing in women leaders around the world. A cofounder of Vital Voices, she has worked for the organization for more 25 years. Under her leadership, Vital Voices has expanded its reach to serve over 20,000 women leaders across 184 countries and territories. This May, Vital Voices opened the first-of-its-kind Global Headquarters for Women’s Leadership in Washington, D.C.?

Alyse is a regular speaker on leadership and global women’s issues. She has spoken before the United Nations General Assembly, the Clinton Global Initiative, Fortune Most Powerful Women, Oxford Student Union, Women in the World, among others. She has conducted leadership training with women at the Central Intelligence Agency, DFID, the UK Development Agency, Fortune 1000 companies and at numerous conferences.

Alyse is a Member in the Council on Foreign Relations and serves as an official Observer for the World Bank’s We-fi Initiative for Women Entrepreneurs. She serves on advisory boards for The B Team , Chime for Change and Global Citizen. Fortune Magazine named Alyse one of the 55 Most Influential Women on Twitter and she was featured as one of Newsweek’s 150 Women Shaking the World. Alyse was honored in 2015 with a Tribeca Disruptive Innovation Award and in 2018 Apolitical named her one of the most influential people in global gender policy.

As we started our conversation, I was immediately struck with Alyse’s forthright observation that our individual paths are rarely perfectly planned. We often hear from our readers that they experience discouragement when faced with a set back. But here, Alyse reflects that in her experience, a path with ups and downs is both perfectly normal and can be a great teacher. She shares,

One of the things I’ve learned along the way is that a person’s path to leadership is rarely planned out perfectly – it’s an experience that begins with a conviction to do something.??

For me, one of the most pivotal decisions I’ve ever made was in August of 1995, when I was 21 years old. I was coming of age in an increasingly interconnected world, desperate to understand my place in it as an American woman. I heard that the United Nations was planning its Fourth World Conference on Women in Beijing, China. It was predicted to be the largest-ever gathering of women leaders in history.

I had to go. I saved and borrowed, and I bought the cheapest airline ticket I could find — one with four layovers before touching down in Beijing. As it turned out, buying the ticket was the easy part. I was denied my request for a conference visa by the Chinese Consulate. For two straight weeks, I went to the consulate every day. I eventually wrangled a tourist visa, which didn’t guarantee that I’d be allowed into the conference. I told myself I’d figure something out when I arrived. It would be an adventure.

The conference, for me, began on the last leg of my journey. The energy on the plane was electric — it was filled with women attending the gathering, including my seat mate, Gertrude Fester, a South African who had been imprisoned for her efforts to end Apartheid. There was a sense that we were on our way to be part of something historic.

I remember standing in a swarm of thousands of women on the first morning of the conference. Suddenly, I felt very small. I realized that these women hadn’t come to Beijing to understand their place in this world. They had come to fight for it.

?Being there, my eyes were suddenly opened by the stories of so many women and the issues they faced. But I kept wondering what was I doing there, why did I feel so compelled to travel all this way??

On the last day of the conference Hillary Clinton spoke in an overflowing hall, in her now-famous speech she proclaimed “human rights are women’s rights and women’s rights are human rights.”

?I felt like she had been sitting with me in all those conversations with women over the course of the week and was now bringing their silenced voices to the world. Here was a woman who knew the power of her voice. She used it to speak up for those whose voices were silenced or ignored. She was so certain of her conviction that she was willing to stake her name and reputation to defend it before the whole world.

I was stunned. I had come to Beijing questioning my place in the world. Here was my answer. I knew I didn’t have the power or platform of someone like Hillary Clinton, but I had a voice, and I knew, then and there, that I wanted to use my voice to create a space for women around the world to be heard.

Taking the leap of going to Beijing, following my passion and believing in that little voice that said “you must” changed the trajectory of my life. I think it’s an incredible gift to take bold risks when you are young, it makes them not as scary to make in the future.

?Beijing was the starting point of a journey that’s taken me around the world and shaped my understanding of leadership. It led me to a White House Internship and to the State Department to work for Secretary Albright, where I joined the team that launched Vital Voices.

?The interactions I had with women leaders in Beijing helped determine my sense of purpose, and my driving force. This was the first in a series of lessons I’ve learned from women leaders, lessons that have not only become the core of Vital Voices and defined our mission as an organization, but guide my own leadership and how I make decisions.?

We’ve had many smart, determined leaders featured throughout this series, but Alyse’s tenacity to visit a consulate for 2 weeks straight to attend a conference reaches a whole new level! It’s clear that Alyse’s determination and pursuit of a very specific goal opened up so many opportunities. When she left for Beijing, she never imagined she’d be leading the organization carrying the mission of the conference forward, but that’s exactly what happened. This is a great example of how a 'She Did What?! ' move can sneak up on you and take you by surprise. We don’t always know how one decision might lead to a totally new career trajectory or path.?

Equally important to Alyse’s determination is her self awareness. Did you you catch what she says? She listened to the little voice telling her “you must.” I find this so important. Even as a 21 year old, Alyse had the self awareness to listen to her calling and then the courage to follow it. I asked Alyse if she had an annual process she goes through to help her stay focused and honest with herself while navigating these pivots. She shares,?

I am not a believer in having a plan for your life. So many of the experiences and opportunities I’ve had, I never could have imagined or planned. But I do believe you need to be true to your driving force. For me, a driving force is the ultimate north star.?

I discovered my own driving force through my experience in Beijing, when I was just 21. And it hasn’t changed since — I am driven to use my voice, my platform and my power to create a space for women around the world to be heard.?

Whenever I’m grappling with a decision or strategy, whenever I’m not sure which is the right way forward, I ask myself if what I’m considering is aligned with my driving force — does it honor my sense of purpose? Figuring out the answer to that question always leads me in the right direction.?

For anyone thinking about making a foundational change, I would say you need to pay attention to that little, persistent voice. Figure out what you feel strongest about, and let that conviction guide you. Trust that it will get you closer to living your purpose. You won’t have all the answers, but if you’re listening to that voice, that driving force, you won’t believe what opportunities and experiences will open up to you. Just keep going.

Alyse’s first major She Did What?! Moment occurred early on in her career. So I was curious how her reinvention/growth process has not only changed and evolved over the years but also how she stays motivated to grow and evolve. In her response, Alyse points back to her conviction in the power of women leaders, a belief that she has devoted her life to through the mission of Vital Voices.

Everything I do, and everything we do as an organization, is really guided by the 20,000+ women leaders in our global network. As the world changes, they adapt. As new crises emerge, they respond. And we are right there with them, standing with and behind their heroic efforts.?

?We are constantly looking for new ways to support them, to meet immediate and long-term needs — whether we’re talking about climate change or ongoing crises in Ukraine and Afghanistan…or even creating the first Global Embassy for Women Leaders. We just opened our doors this year and hope it will be a place of collaboration and support, but also amplification. These are incredible women who, even in the midst of an unimaginable crisis, are thinking of others, mobilizing networks and resources, seeing possibilities where others see only problems.?

I think these last couple of years have been extreme and world-changing in so many ways. But as we know from history, times of crisis are also times of profound opportunity. I think we have a once in a generation chance to leap forward — and women leaders are how we can do it. Listening to women, investing in their solutions, raising our voices in support of their ideas, that’s how we get to a more equitable, prosperous future for everyone.?

I definitely feel a sense of urgency at this moment. And a sense of opportunity. I hope we can rise to meet both. And I hope we all choose to fight for women because, as I see every single day, women are fighting for us.

?Alyse’s 5 tips for radical self-evaluation?

I always come back to the lessons I’ve learned from Vital Voices leaders around the world. Everything I’ve learned about leadership, I’ve learned from these transformative women leaders. I realized over time that there were a set of five core, guiding principles or characteristics that the most effective leaders embody. Together, they form the Vital Voices Leadership Model.?

Whenever I evaluate myself and my leadership, I reflect on these five core principles and ask myself if I’m practicing each of these in my decision making. I think they absolutely apply to anyone who’s looking to evaluate themselves and consider how their leadership measures up.?

1. Driving Force or Sense of Mission: Do you have a clearly defined driving force? Are you dedicated to leaving a legacy that is larger than yourself?

2. Strong Roots in the Community: Are you identifying with the needs of others and acting inclusively to address the perspectives of everyone who has a stake in your work?

3. Ability to Connect Across Lines that Divide: Are you building consensus within a community? Are you partnering with unlikely allies and advancing a truly shared vision for progress?

4. Bold Ideas and Bold Action: Are you taking creative risks and being solution-oriented? Are you actively thinking outside of the box to overcome challenges.?

5. Paying it Forward: Are you mentoring or sponsoring someone in the rising generation? Are you pursuing your driving force sustainably, making sure that your work and mission will outlast you?

Thank you Alyse for sharing your approach with She Did What?! From your first 'She Did What?!' moment to your bold vision for launching a global headquarters for women’s leadership there is much to be learned by your thoughtful approach and determination and we are grateful for you sharing with our readers.

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